Stream of Consciousness
Word of the Day: 頼もしい
I am starting to both love and hate that I am back into learning Japanese. As I look at the tv screen, I realize that I am living a double life with the fact that I am lying about doing weed. I... No. I have to believe in my self and my own actions. I have to understand my purpose though. And that sounds so existential.. I really like Japanese but I think my purpose is my writing here... Or maybe it is all I can afford at the moment. I want to enjoy my time.... afford, yes. I am poor as fuck and can't afford anything right now, not even time.
By Kayla McIntosh2 months ago in Confessions
Word of the Day: 劣等生
I already wrote this but it got deleted for some reason. I just want to destress before I have to spend the rest of the day ( literally the rest of the day ) just studying Math and Japanese. Mostly math though since I have that pesky test tomorrow.
By Kayla McIntosh2 months ago in Confessions
echoes of my derangement
have you ever heard of a self-fulfilling prophecy? well, that's the story of my life. but instead of a nice, neat line, my path got twisted over itself creating echoes from my past into my present. maybe that's just part of growing up, but mine are all laid on top of each other like a mess of fingerprints on the windows of my soul. maybe that's just part of growing up, too, but i think it's probably not. this feels like one of those stories you tell where you think it's normal until everyone is sad at the end.
By Maia Gadwall the metAlchemist2 months ago in Confessions
ramblings of a madwoman
so i think i figured out how, biomechanically speaking, metAlchemy works in the brains it works in (most/all) and why there might be an exception in my husband. ready to take a trip on the crazy train? it's about to get delusional in here, folks. here's your chance to walk away.
By Maia Gadwall the metAlchemist2 months ago in Confessions
Word of the Day: 優等生
I accidentally drank too much last night and threw up in the shower ( I cleaned it up afterwards but..) It happened because I bought alcohol instead of weed because I didn't have enough for delivery ( your order has to equal 40+ dollars to enable delivery ) and it already got sort of late/passed the delivery window and I didn't want to walk to the store to buy some directly so I thought I could just do that. Big mistake.
By Kayla McIntosh2 months ago in Confessions
Word of the Day: へとへと
I am in Japanese class and the Japanese teacher is scolding everyone about the test. I am correcting everyone's wrong answer they are blurting out while writing this so I am like, just not in the mood. I understand her frustration though, I mean I don't really get to practice Japanese anywhere except with Yukki san, but he is talking in a stream and it is just.. yea.
By Kayla McIntosh2 months ago in Confessions
SECOND LIFE:. AI-Generated.
Rayan Khan lived a quiet, nearly invisible lifestyles in Lahore. At 32, he had no circle of relatives, few pals, and a recurring that hardly ever changed. every morning, he walked to his small photograph layout studio, sipped chai on the equal nook stall, and again to a modest condo packed with books and silence. He was content—or at least he idea he turned into.
By The Writer...A_Awan2 months ago in Confessions
Word of the Day: おばさん
I don't really need to write anything but I think I want to just get used to sitting at the dining table again to work on homework. I need to work on the presentation tomorrow but I am trying to follow my todo list faithfully and it says that homework is up next.
By Kayla McIntosh2 months ago in Confessions
Word of Day: 練習
Yea, I think I am sort of getting sick. I feel like jittery and my cheeks are hot. When I get home I need to sleep and drink some tea or something. I am not sure what I am doing but deep in my gut, I feel off for some reason, even past physical. I feel spiritually/mentally off right now. I don't know why. I hope I am not getting sick.
By Kayla McIntosh2 months ago in Confessions
