Broooos Please Nooooo 🫂 We Meme You Both So Much!!!

Hello again! 👋😁⚡

It's me! I'm __Lightning Bolt⚡.

I'm a lost satirist who has wandered far from usual home. I generally publish collections of crackpot memes over in the Humor Community. But all that real action right now belongs in the Swamp.

If you are wondering why it has been so long since I last did an episode of this series, I have My Excuses. The last few months have been a hectic time for us all...

... but nothing like this last week!!!

It's the Donald Vs Elon!

I haven't been on the edge of my seat like this since I saw the original King Kong Vs Godzilla as a kid!

Before I continue, as always, I have a few

\\___W A R N I N G S___//

You are about to enter a hostile environment! Combat is taking place below. Your safety cannot and will not be assured.

If you have loved ones who are astronauts in need of return to Earth, prepare for horrible news.

If you are Kanye, go away. I owe you no royalties for my title. You can't get blood from a turnip anyway.

If you are one of those spammers, those 'bad actors' who will comment on this story moments after I post it, you aren't fooling anybody.

Elon, if you're reading this and want me to stop shit-posting about you, that's what the tip feature is for.

And {read the earlier episodes of this series} the standard cautions also apply: you could fall in love me, be irradiated, contract malaria, have delusions of grandeur, experience a midlife crisis, lose your capacity to cook, be put on an extraterrestrial's junk mailing list, yadda yadda yadda.

But let's look back for a moment

Remember how calm things were right after Trump took office? 😂😂🤣

Every day, we always knew exactly what to expect.

It was a New Age in American Politics!

Trump was constantly flaunting his expertise on the world stage.👇

💛 And Donald loves him some gold! 💛🪙💛

Besides flattery, the best way to buy into Trump's good graces is with gold. 🪙

Have you seen the White House since his occupation?

The Donald constantly needs a bigger and bigger treasure trove to prove he has no desire whatsoever to be king.

He wants Canada to be the 51st State. He wants Greenland Just Because. In his overinflated mind, there is no way Mexico should be entitled to that perfectly good Gulf.

But don't think he's greedy!

All that gold surrounding him has nothing to do with his under-inflated dick & over-inflated ego.

All the world leaders talk about him behind his back.

There isn't a sovereign alive who doesn't know Trump's Achilles' heal is greed.

He envies anyone who is richer than he is.

Ostentatious displays of wealth are something the Donald especially craves!

Before the Big Breakup between the Billionaires, memes were flying in with regularly. We had all the typical topics that make Trump unlike any President ever: his vengeance, his bigotry, his ignorance, his open displays of graft.

⚡😁👍

Because nothing says, "I care about Social Security" like your own personal horde of gold.

MEANWHILE

For months, Donald & Elon were raising their bastard child DOGE, like the Thorne family raised Damien. Trump & Musk declared they were on a mission to "cut waste." That's billionaire code: for "decimating agencies vital to vulnerable Americans well-being."

Planes started crashing. Intelligence leaked. Disaster response was a disaster. Education was attacked. Medical research was halted.

Measles had been eradicated, until these people got their hands on the reigns!

Death, disease, inflation, the rich getting richer while the poor get poorer, open bigotry back in fashion, hatemongering from the top trickling on down--

It's like living in 1925 instead of 2025, only with cellphones and spray tans.

Such a nostalgic age to be alive! ⚡🥹

Since Trump is determined to stifle free speech in defiance of the Constitution, couldn't we start with every statement made by the Secretary of Health and Human Services? Please??

Before this Epic Hissy Fit between Musk and Trump, I had barely begun collecting all the TACO memes.

You know about T.A.C.O., right?

Trump loathes the nickname!

😂🤣😂😂🤣🤣

You see how upset he looks? ⚡😁👇 Poor Donny!

When it comes to his inane, self-destructive, prejudicial (penguin targeted) tariffs,

Trump

Always

Chickens

Out.

It makes perfect sense, and he sees it as an insult.

What could be better for meme-ing?!?

We need a meme that conveys how the standard taco crumbles as it's taken out of its wrapper.

Am I right?

No one could ever doubt he's so much more agile than Biden!

⚡😂👆 🤣😂😂🤣

🤢🤮🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮

In the WARNING at the top, I should have cautioned that some of these memes could be nauseating. They can leave afterimages inside your head that are disturbing.

_______ My bad. 🤷‍♂️

And don't forget to leave out quality cannabis for the Easter Bunny!

Regardless of what moronic thing the President has done on any given day, Fox News and Newsmax just keep spinning his idiocy as some kind of genius calculation in his masterplan. Sycophants sling crazy explanations for Trump's silliness, looking for any shit that might stick with other conservative kooks.

Much of the time, MAGA doesn't even hear Trump's stupidest statements. Right-wing media edits his insanity (and mistakes!!!!) out of their lives.

But there is one meme that is timeless. It never ceases to delight most of the world while pissing off the Cult of MAGA.

⚡___________________ ⚡

So Think Back

It wasn't all that long ago when Romance Was Still in the Air in Washington.

Remember?

On February 7, 2025, Elon Musk tweeted,

"I love the @RealDonaldTrump as much as a straight man can love another man."

Straight?

Who's he think he's kidding?

No one has that many kids who isn't a closeted bisexual trying to overcompensate.

And why is this all coming out during Pride Month?

🤔🤔🤔

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Here's the timeline of the World's Most Watchable Catfight.

On Friday, May 30th, Donald Trump ushered Elon Musk out of the White House with all the usual pomp and circumstance. Trump said, "Elon gave an incredible service," and that, "There's nobody like him."

THANK GOD, there's nobody else like Elon!!!

Naturally, Trump gave Elon some gold.

For a few days, it seemed like T & E might keep it civil...

... but then, no one was surprised when, on Thursday, June 5th, it turned dark. (Nobody was surprised, that is, except Fox News commentators and right-wing podcasters like Joe Rogan.)

The ALERTS started going out, like tornado warnings.

⚡___________________ ⚡

⚡___________________ ⚡

Within a day, everyone worldwide dropped less-pressing concerns (like hunting and gathering) to watch the developing spectacle.

Elon swung the first swing.

Elon went on to say,

"It will massively increase the already gigantic budget deficit to $2.5 trillion (!!!) and burden America (sic) citizens with crushingly unsustainable debt."

All around the world

production ground to a halt!

Trump responded by saying that he was "very disappointed" by Musk's comments. He always likes pretending he's the reasonable one. 😂🤣

Both of them related their own version of what happened.

"Without me," said Elon, "Trump would have lost the election, Dems would control the house, and Republicans would be 51-49 in the Senate."

{{ Note to Musk: remember those facts in the future when you wonder why Telsa dealerships are on fire. }}

Trump replied that he would have easily won Pennsylvania without Musk's help.

Oh, these girls!

Musk was All In for a while. He was frothing on his own little platform. He talked about Trump's Big Bill calling it "Ugly" instead of Beautiful. How rude!

Elon even said, "It is time to create a new political party in America that actually represents the 80% in the middle."

In the middle?

Trump then did what every sleazeball does. He called his ex crazy.

Have you ever noticed that no matter how disconnected Biden is from any situation, the Donald still finds a way to mention him? It won't be long before Trump will be blaming Joe for the South losing the Civil War.

⚡___________________ ⚡

For those of you scoring at home, Reason will still ultimately prevail in Washington.

God Bless Bernie Sanders, a True American Patriot!

At just before 3 pm on June 5th, Elon was hitting back at Trump. He said Trump was obviously lying that Elon cared about the EV mandate. "So sad," he said.

The situation was getting serious.

Personally, I don't have much sympathy for anyone who owns a Tesla. I would have thought they would have seen the handwriting on the wall when they saw this...

But as the billionaires battled it out, each from their own safe space, it was clear what a chaotic time it was for everyone.

[Qatar was still sleeping off a hangover from its wild night partying with Donald.] So the next breaking development in the story was this....

In fact, I can't verify it for certain, but I think the next salvo from Trump was this one. ⚡👇

And then Elon took the fight to a whole other level. He wrote...

"Time to drop the really big bomb: Donald Trump is in the Epstein files. That is the real reason they have not been made public."

Suddenly everything made sense!

All the right-wing commentators were in a mad scramble as Musk was melting down.

Joe Rogan said that someone should take away Elon's phone.

Hey, Joe! You can't take Musk's phone without taking away Donald's!

That's the Right to Bear Arms in the year 2025!

That meme ⚡👆 represents the general populace at large.

Adjustments would need to be made in order for a meme like that to properly represent these girls.

Trump is entirely too decrepit to hold his feet up like that. He'd be sitting at desk with gold decorations and a US flag behind him. Elon would be sitting at a big desk with a humanoid robot standing behind him.

But they would both still have their backs to one another, facing nothing but cheering throngs.

⚡___________________ ⚡

ELSEWHERE

You would think he'd be more outgoing after killing a pope.

⚡___________________ ⚡

It was apparent that nobody in America could mediate this catfight.

Word was getting out to the most secluded Americans, even citizens who had isolated themselves for the sake of their own sanity.

I'm human. I was like everybody else. As all this bickering took place between Musk & Trump, for several days I felt a renewed reason to live.

Even before Elon started his breakup-badmouthing, the Epstein allegations were already whispered about. Donald is a pervert, a womanizer, and a philanderer. That's been proven. He lied about it under oath.

He also likely turned a blind eye to pedophilia.

Nothing all that surprising there.

But we know what to do if your ex says something scandalous about you.

✅☑️✔ First call them crazy. ✔️

Then call into question their veracity with allegations of drug use! Basically Donald said...

'Elon is a speed freak!'

That's a believable accusation too!

And we're all like....

Burn, baby, burn!

It pays to be an optimist.

I try to look on the bright side.

Even in the bleakest times, capitalists find a way to prosper. ☑✔️

Trump & Musk's rants can no longer be found in cyberspace. They've been taken down.

But we did enjoy the Truth while it was on naked display!

To recap.....

Trump created this crisis in L.A. where no problem existed a week ago.

I can't sum up the protests in California better than a resident. Check out Jimmy Kimmel's monologue at the end of my story. He not only shows video of what's happening in Los Angeles, he shows a montage of what a dozen past Presidents have said about immigrants.

One last meme to top everything off.

This might be my favorite commentary of the year.

Does anyone know Jane of the North?

I want to be her friend!!!

⚡_____________⚡_____________ ⚡

6/11/25

It seems like Elon & the Donald might be reconciling already.

All good things must come to an end.

________________________Bolt⚡

Participate in No King's Day *** June 14, 2025

Turning Americans against Americans, Trump = our wannabe king.