Simon Aylward
Bio
Undiscovered Irish Playwright and Poet - Seeker of eternal youth - Wannabe time traveller and believer in spiritual energies - Too many books to read, not enough time!
Achievements (1)
Stories (89)
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My Children's first Profanities!
My son attempted his first swear at just four years old. He was watching a Power Rangers battle on my 50-inch flat-screen one morning, when he decided to join in. He did this by repeatedly bashing his action figure Tommy, off the evil Goldar’s head.
By Simon Aylward10 months ago in Humor
Life, Death and Onions. Top Story - March 2025.
The familiar blend of Victorian and modern architecture shifts my thoughts between past and present. Craning up at the glass tower where my wife lies in pain and uncertainty, I wonder what might come next in this continuing period drama. As I enter, the warm disinfectant air hits my nostrils and I drift back twenty years. My very first day as a hospital Porter …
By Simon Aylward10 months ago in Confessions
May The Cakes be with You
"What the hell are you munching on now? The play's about to start!" Rosie whispered harshly at Robert and scowled. "That hippy parent with the dreads was selling homemade Rocky Road," Robert replied. "Oh, don’t be such a misery luv, it all goes towards the school funds."
By Simon Aylward10 months ago in Humor
Why I Quit Sunday School
Now that I'm over halfway through my life and full of Yoda-like wisdom, I realise that my values have frequently been shaped by those poignant moments in childhood that I would rather forget. This particular incident likely turned me towards atheism …
By Simon Aylward10 months ago in Humans
I’m Sorry We Stole Your Golf Balls!
(Content warning! contains Irish teenage expletives!) As a young teenager, I had a friend called Jack that was a bit of a kleptomaniac. So much so, that he was expelled from his Grammar school for stealing a Roman coin from a museum. I thought that was pretty cool!
By Simon Aylward10 months ago in Confessions
