Missed Photo Ops on the Way to the Donut Shop

Yesterday, on 1/24, I went on a most unexpected adventure.

⚡__________________ ⚡

I'm an old bisexual white man passionately in love with a younger gay black man. He's put me through hell the last few months. Technically we are currently broken up, but he lives in a bedroom across the hall, and I see him, my "ex" every day.

What sucks for me is I still love him, and every time I think I've reigned in my heart, he weasels his way back in.

I could go on... but this isn't about disappointments of the past.

This is about gratitude! ⚡😁👍

Just to complete the background story... I can't drink. I can't drive. I have epilepsy. I've had to rely on others for transportation ever since the seizures started five years ago.

Also pertinent is I have no family or friends outside De's (my ex's) circle. I'm often the lone white face amongst beautiful black people.

⚡__________________ ⚡

So, on Thursday-Friday night, De was drinking E&J. He drank way more than normal.

And he was kind to me, warm to me, dancing around, singing, laughing like a madman.

I've seen him amped up and bebopping around before. That wasn't new. It was his attitude about me that was shocking.

But I told myself that he's always nicer to me when he's drunk.

We have a friend that lives with us, who works third shift. When he came home around 4:30 am, he was surprised to find us up.

It was like the Universe prepared me for what was ahead. I was tired Thursday and took long naps, enabling me to be up til dawn on Friday.

Just as I was about to bed down at roughly 7 am, De's mama called to say we were going to a donut shop in another city, about a 45-minute drive from where we live.

She was driving since De was plastered.

I don't have much of a sweet tooth. I wouldn't drive a half mile away for a donut, let alone to another county.

But De talked me into it. It was weird having him want me to go with him and the two people he loves most. It felt like it did when we were together, when he used to love me.

⚡__________________ ⚡

For me, January is always beyond crazy cold as hell. Anything below 67 makes me shiver. And we just had a cold snap here in Central Indiana where it was -12 for a couple days.

We've had roughly 3" of snow in various spurts over the last couple weeks.

Friday morning at dawn, it was 15 degrees.

🥶🥶 Freezing. 🥶🥶🥶

I had no clue that I'd using the cold for art.

De was behind me as I left the house wearing my coat and four layers of clothes.

The sun was rising.

I haven't seen a sunrise in years.

Pinks, reds, oranges, and the accented white of the clouds were splashed out atop the blue sky. The sun was very low on the horizon, a giant blinding spot.

I immediately thought about taking a photograph.

Leaving the house doesn't happen to me every day, let alone with this kind of timing.

There were tree branches in the way. I would need to find a better spot to take a picture.

De excitedly said, "Go, go, GO!"

So, disappointed I couldn't capture an image of Sol, I hurried to his mama's car.

The trip to the donut shop was a laugh riot. His mom was so animated. She talked all the way there.

Since De was plastered, he was pretty boisterous too.

His mama seems to like me. She actually told me she loved me after our excursion.

She said that I have 2% black in me.

I laughed and said, "Works for me!"

The morning sun was blazing as we drove east.

Everyone was so excited when we arrived at the gigantic shop, because of the vast selection of donuts. The place was as big as a Texas Roadhouse.

I was excited because of the company.

On the way home, We Who Had Been Up All Night were exhausted. De was the only one who was drunk when we started out and he passed out the moment he ate all his donuts.

His mama was talking all the way home.

I was just idly listening to her (thinking I would have preferred any Mexican dish over d0nuts), when I looked off to my right and saw a deer.

I was awestruck. ⚡

The barren Hoosier farmland was blanketed white. There was a fence line, probably a boundary between properties, and along it was also a line of trees, stretching off for acres. That's where the deer was, moving along beside those trees, and I quickly realized there was more than one.

There were seven, maybe as many as ten deer!

The way the wild creatures ran was like jump after jump-- bounding along. To describe it as 'running' feels like it would conjure an inaccurate image of what I saw.

They were all in a perfect line, one following another, leaping, bouncing, long-hopping.

I only saw them for a minute.

It happened very fast.

But I thought immediately a couple things. The first was...

SYNCHRONICITY!

God/the Universe/Fate put all those deer at exactly that spot at exactly that moment for me to see them. It gives me greater faith in the divine.

I'm so thankful!

I don't believe in coincidences.

Let me tell you too: if you don't believe in coincidences, it changes your attitude about everything!

When you see the world through that lens, with coincidences redefined as 'little' miracles, there are these instances of what feels like empathy and telepathy combined.

Like you walk through the door at Walmart thinking about an old friend you haven't seen in years and out walks the old friend, thinking of you. It's an encounter that only takes minutes as you say hello, smiling... but it's orchestrated synchronicity for the betterment of you both.

Seeing those deer running across the snowy countryside provided me with a mystical moment, a feeling of Connection.

I've felt very alone and disconnected lately.

The other people in the car were... I don't even know how to describe it... "mildly impressed". If I asked them now what was the best part of that morning, I'm certain they'd all say something about the donuts!

I wanted a video of those running deer.

I wanted a photograph.

If I'd been on the right side of the car, I might have been able to take one. But my friend was on that side. And it happened too fast.

Like the sunrise, I had missed another photo opportunity. ⚡🫤

But I was thinking about ya'all!

And I was determined to commemorate my adventure with a photograph, one way or another.

Seeing the sun through the frosty window gave me an idea....

Do you like my canvass?

Love & Light to Everyone on Vocal.

⚡💙⚡

Stay warm!

______________ Bolt⚡