How to Identify and Deal with Emotional Triggers

Have you ever been having a good day, and you get a telephone call and someone mentions something that upsets you? Have you seen a person who reminds you of someone who caused you pain in the past? Have you ever heard a song that reminded you of something you would rather forget?

Those are triggers because they are flashbacks to things you don't want to think about. In fact, you have probably buried them so you wouldn't have to think about them. Unfortunately, everyone gets triggers that ruin their day.

What Is a Trigger?

A trigger is something in your present that reminds you of something in your past. Even though this article focuses mostly on triggers that cause you pain, know that some triggers can also put a smile on your face.

For instance, the smell of food could remind you of what your mother or grandmother cooked when you were younger. In that case, the emotional trigger is positive, bringing about pleasure rather than pain.

No one is exempt from having emotional triggers. Everyone has personal triggers that are unique only to them. A trigger for one person might not be a trigger for someone else. When confronted with triggers, some people are so strongly affected that they get panic attacks.

You know if you have a trigger if something that somebody says makes you feel bad, sad, anxious, angry, depressed, shameful, and even guilty about an experience.

Triggers are basically people, places, things, or events that remind you of something unpleasant that you would rather forget. A trigger could be a song you hear that reminds you of an unpleasant experience in the past, such as a romantic breakup.

A negative trigger conjures up memories that remind you of your original trauma, pain, or discomfort.

How Triggers Come About?

Anything can be a trigger. It can come about by any of the five senses: sight, sound, smell, touch, or taste. It can be one or a combination of the senses.

Sight: Seeing an accident on the highway might trigger the trauma of a family member who was killed in a car crash.

Sound: Hearing someone talking about something that traumatized you in the past might trigger that emotion in the present. Hearing a song that was associated with a bad experience in the past might trigger unpleasant feelings in the present.

Smell: The scent of perfume or food can trigger memories of happy or sad times.

Touch: Touching a garment, a photo, or other objects could evoke positive or negative feelings.

Taste: Tasting food can transport you back to a past eating experience, whether it was in your family's dining room or at a restaurant with a friend that you miss.

Triggers are very personal. If you have survived a traumatic experience, then you are most likely to have some sort of triggers.

Common Triggers

• anniversary dates of losses
• reminders of trauma
• reminders of failures
• family arguments
• being judged, criticized, teased, or put down
• hearing others boast about their success
• being yelled at
• anything that makes you feel uncomfortable
• seeing someone who mistreats you
• experiencing one or more of the five senses

How to Deal with Triggers

You can avoid coming in contact with triggers if you know what they are. Look back over your life and identify those things that made you angry, sad, or depressed in the past. If there is a recurring theme, and those memories still make you angry, sad, or depressed, then those are your triggers.

You can avoid some triggers by avoiding people and places that trigger flashbacks of unpleasant situations. The bad thing is that it is impossible to stay away from everything and everybody, such as your family, friends, co-workers, and church members. They might be the ones who caused you to have bad experiences in the past, and they continue to do so in the present.

During family gatherings, someone might reminisce and remind you of something you would rather not talk about. Sometimes they will go on and on without realizing that the conversation is making you feel uncomfortable. When that triggers unpleasant feelings, try not to engage in the conversation. Excuse yourself from the group as inconspicuously as possible.

Sometimes people will deliberately poke you just because they know you have a certain trigger. When that happens, do not engage with them. If you let the conversation continue, it will make matters worse and that is what the person wants just so he or she can get the upper hand on you.

Author's Note

This article was written based on personal experiences. I know what my triggers are and the cause of them. When I experience negative triggers, it takes me a while to get over them. Therefore, I avoid them as much as possible.