Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guy
Bio
I am a humorist who writes short poems and mostly limericks. The purpose of my poetry is to put a smile on people’s faces.
Smiles and Laughter are what I am after because those are both wonderful things.
Stories (42)
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DR. STEIN RULES GOLF
DR. STEIN RULES GOLF CONCEPT The whole idea behind Dr. Stein Rules Golf is to make the game more fun, especially for beginners, occasional players and those players who do not possess the skill to play the game at a serious level where they are trying to shoot a low score and lower their handicap. Again, it is all about making that “walk in the park” and spending quality time with your friends more fun without any frustration and embarrassment from your lack of athletic ability and lack of skill at a very difficult game that very few people play well. It focuses more on the social aspect of the game more than the competitive athletic aspect. It’s about having a good time where you laugh at the bad shots and cheer for the good shots. It’s for those golfers who feel that they had a great day at the golf course with their golf buddies when there are more good jokes than good shots, which most likely be the case if you choose to be playing Dr. Stein Rules Golf.
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guy10 months ago in Humor
National Caregivers Day
Unfortunately, I have much experience as a care giver. I have lost two wives to pancreatic cancer. They were both beautiful, wonderful people with kind, loving hearts who had life taken away from them much too soon. I was with them both at the very end after doing everything that I possibly could to help prepare them for the inevitable and provide them with any and all the comfort I could. As a caregiver, I became highly aware of their every need and did whatever was necessary to provide it for them. It was life changing for me in many ways.
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guy11 months ago in Poets
A Dreaming of Hitting It Big Classic Art Meme Limerick
How does one become unexpectedly rich? Someone, maybe a rich relative who’s ass you’ve been kissing for years, dies and leaves you money? You might have a misguided sense of entitlement that this could happen. And imagine your disappointment when you discover that Aunt Lilly left a million bucks to an animal rescue shelter and all that you got was a $5 McDonald’s gift card. I am pretty sure that the way most people think they are going to become unexpectedly rich is by winning the lottery. Yes, someone has to win…but I am also pretty sure that there’s a better chance that you’ll grow wings and fly before you win the lottery. That said…you can’t win if you don’t play!
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guy11 months ago in Poets
National Jump In A Puddle and Splash Your Friends Day
#StepInAPuddleAndSplashYourFriendsDay “If you are feeling somewhat mischievous (in a nice kind of way), join in on the celebration that all kids will love and all the young-at-heart adults will love just the same. Put on your boots, raincoats, slickers and grab some rubber duckies, too. Skip along the way. Splashing in puddles can be a terrific way to relieve stress. There’s no right or wrong way to splashing or stepping in a puddle. We’re going to get wet and probably a little dirty no matter how you do it. So splash away.” – National Day Calendar
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guyabout a year ago in Poets
An Appropriately Disrespectful Classic Art Meme Limerick
I am a fan of the Classic Art Memes that have been a big hit on Facebook. There are many groups that post them. There is much clever creativity on display when someone takes a classic painting of a person and/or people and turns it into a popular social media post by “putting words in their mouths.” For me, they have been an inspiration for limericks. I have stockpiled quite a few to work on, knowing that they have a muse quality that I will be able to capture with five lines of wisdom, wit and rhyme. And there are those, like this one, where it happens the moment that I see it, usually with some form of the last line popping into my head. I am sure that 2025 will be filled with Classic Art Meme limericks – the fun’s just starting.
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guyabout a year ago in Poets
Valuable Advice About Free Advice
I learned a lot about life working in my dad’s junkyard. It was a place that always had unusual and interesting characters hanging around (like myself). Some of these characters were junkyard philosophers and some of them gave me some profundity that I think about a lot. One piece of junkyard philosophy came from a street hustler who did some time for armed robbery. He was a very observant fellow who got his education at the school of hard knocks. He offered this about things being “free.” He would say, “ ‘FREE’?? There ain’t nothing ‘free,’” meaning that there was always a price or catch. And in the case of “free advice” the price is the potential consequences from listening to advice from people that do not have a personal interest in solving your problem. When things go South for you from listening to them, they are going to quote Brother Bluto in Animal House – “You fucked up. You trusted us.”
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guyabout a year ago in Poets
A Convert Me? No, I’ll Convert You!
This meme brought back some memories for me. A long time ago in a galaxy far away, I attended a college in the Bible Belt. We would, on occasion, be visited by fundamentalist Christian missionaries. My Christian roommates assigned me, their Jewish roommate, the task of sending them away. I would answer the door wearing a Star of David necklace, a yarmulka and boxer shorts with my kitchen shears in my hand. I would educate them about the Jewish ritual of a bris and offer to show them that I was circumcised. Then I’d show them the kitchen shears and offer to convert them to Judaism on the spot They’d leave and not come back.
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guyabout a year ago in Poets
Spicy Is Dicey
There are those who cannot get their food spicy enough. It may be a cultural thing where the food they were raised on is smoking hot and they have acquired a taste for it. And then there are adventurous eaters who love Mexican, Indian, Szechuan and other foods loaded with fiery peppers. But if you like your food high on the Scoville scale you have to be prepared for seismic gastro-intestinal reactions and volcanic repercussions.
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guyabout a year ago in Poets
A Collection of Thanksgiving Thoughts and Limericks and a Poem
Thanksgiving is around the corner. It is a food and family festival extravaganza in America. The grocery stores are locked and loaded. There are lots of places that offer prepared Thanksgiving dinners. And, for those who want to forgo cooking and cleaning and catering to relatives that they have to pretend to like, there are many restaurants that will be serving Thanksgiving dinners. I have exercised this option successfully many times and had some exceptional Thanksgiving dinners. Had my fill, paid the bill and then went home to watch football and chill.
By Joel Kravitz The Limerick Guyabout a year ago in Poets
