Latest Stories
Most recently published stories in Psyche.
Being Bipolar
It's so difficult to explain, doesn't matter how much a person wants to understand you they just don't quite get it. I watched my mom suffer from it, she freaked me out and I would constantly yell at her to take her meds, I always thought that was the answer to everything. Pop one pill and she would go back to functioning like a normal "sane" person.
By LeAnn Murch5 years ago in Psyche
The Promise I Couldn't Keep
I will start off with a back story. I was raised in an very abusive household and beyond that, raised in a horrible environment including my neighborhood and my schools (Gangs, shootings, drive-bys yes even at the schools.) Growing up I've seen 3 people die in front of me, one being a fellow classmate during recess in 4th grade. Needless to say I was raised in trauma. Fast forward to moving to a small town and meeting the only person in my life I've ever been close to. My best friend/sister Daytona Hudgins.
By Victorya Dianna Marie Smith5 years ago in Psyche
Letters to my mental health (part 2)
Fuck off depression. No one likes you, especially not after today. You invited me over and made me sit in the dark, in the silence and think. Do you not remember what happens when I'm left with my own thoughts? It didn't help that you sat there staring at me, encouraging me to fall deeper into a hole. Why pretend to be my friend, lure me in, only to make me feel worse. And it doesn't go when you leave. Nope, I stay like this for a while. Sometimes it can be weeks before my mood picks up again. Sometimes the day I start to feel better you pay me another visit and I end up back at square one.
By TheAdventuresOfRoo5 years ago in Psyche
Affects of Abuse
She looked at herself in the mirror blood on her face and what would most likely be a black eye. She couldn't help but to wonder how she got there. She remembered the first time that she sow her mothers face the same way. It must have been happening for a long time before she sow it, she realized. She toke a deep breath and did the only thing that she knew to do, she cleaned up. She cleaned her face up, and got herself together. She went out into the living room and realized how much her life had become just like her childhood. The life that she swore that she never would have, the life that she promised herself she would never let happen. But somehow it had become the one thing that she never wanted, the one thing that she knew maybe. And just like when she was her a child she cleaned up so that she could go to sleep and wake up like it never happened. She went to sleep telling herself that she just needed to not make him so mad, she just needed to change and be better.
By Talara Nolan5 years ago in Psyche
I Am the Honey Badger
I have scars on my arm put there by me. After being hospitalized over 20 times, you would expect a lot more than there are. Or you would expect a lot worse fate for myself. Fortunately, I made it through. But, not without help from professionals and support from the people who care about me.
By Isabel Ann F. S.5 years ago in Psyche
Make Friends With Your Demons
I have always struggled with mental health issues, especially with depression and anxiety. Most of the time I’m an extremely bubbly and positive person. I thrive on positive energy, I’m full of ambition and motivation and love to uplift people. However from time to time, depression creeps up on me and I fall into a vicious cycle of negative thought, mixed with anxiety and hopelessness. I’ve always imagined depression to be this dark demon that embodies you, crawls deep inside of you, lays his nest in the core of your chest and refuses to leave once he feels your warmth.
By SabrinaSpsfk5 years ago in Psyche
RIP
I got this tattoo when I was 18 years old. I was struggling with substance abuse since I was 14 years old. Anything from weed to extremely hard drugs. I went to treatment a few times, at that age I was forced so I didn’t take it very seriously. It was hard on my family financially and emotionally. Eventually I pulled myself out and started working full time and made something of myself. What inspired me to get this prayer on my body was to remind myself of my past but to also honor those who have passed. I grew up in Maple Grove, MN. Well. For my teen years I did. My group, whatever you want to call it. The “popular” the “sport people” the “pretty people”. Ew but yes I belonged to them. We all used drugs. Bad drugs. Some socially, some daily. I can count on both hands how many friends I have lost due to heroin overdoses. Being that I was nearly one of them, but I survived my OD in 2012. When I was resuscitated three times, all I can remember when I went out was that it was complete darkness. There was no light. There was no “my entire life flashed before my eyes” I was just done. I was in the ICU for 8 days. I didn’t have medical insurance. It hurt me in so many ways. I got this prayer to keep me guided, but also to honor my friends who didn’t get as lucky as I did. Now, recently, fast forward to 2020. My mother was a avid alcoholic since the age of 13. She hid it pretty well throughout my life as she was very in and out of it during my childhood. I knew at the age of 7 that if my mom started shaking, she needed a beer. Or preferably vodka. She battled and battled to get sober. She attended various treatment programs anywhere from 30 days to 120 days. My dad wouldn’t really allow her to see me due to this issue she had. He had 100% custody due to the fact. When I got my own car at 16 I would go and see her frequently. She drank because she lost her marriages and children because of drinking. However it never helped her stop. I tried my most possible best to try to inspire and influence her to do better and be better over the last decade. I gave her two of my pure bred Labrador retrievers so she felt like she had a purpose in life. She didn’t work. So she was home every day, all day. My step dad worked to take care of her. Over the last year she progressively got worse. She would say and do very mean things to me while drunk. She would call the cops on me knowing it would screw me over (license issues) we got into a very bad fight one day as well and to this day it makes me sick. My mom, at the age of 56, had lost this battle with addiction and alcoholism. On July 3rd, 2020. My 4th of July weekends will never be the same. I never got to see her speak or open her eyes since she was rushed to the ER for liver failure. Her skin was bright bright yellow. She told the doctors she wanted to die. She didn’t want any machines hooked up to her, she wanted to die. They drugged her up and let her go over a course of 14 days. I was able to speak to her and get the last twitch of a smile out of her... I sat there for a hour and asked why the world was taking my mom from me at the age of 26. Why couldn’t she have just snapped out of it like I did. She had me? The dogs? My step dad? She had a easy life? Why? Why did she want to die so badly.... she killed herself with the bottle. Not only was her liver failing but so were her kidneys. She then got a infection in her brain which took over her ability to function. Talk, look around etc. We transferred her to a hospice where she passed less than 24 hours. We said bye to her as she was already passed away. I won’t forget how I saw struggle all over her face, blood not wiped up around her nose and lips. Etc. but they had the nerve to tell me she peacefully went in her sleep. She was cold. More vibrantly yellow. I said goodbye to my mom on her deathbed at the age of 26. I miss her so much. And I miss my friends. This is why I have this tattoo. To honor those who have struggled with addiction and who have lost the battle with addiction.
By Marissa Locke5 years ago in Psyche
Abuse and what it’s done to us.
Abuse affects the brain, abuse, and neglect and trauma changes the brain structure and chemical function. Potential effects include feeling fearful most or all of the time. Trauma disorders cause extreme fear of anxiety depression outbursts flashbacks and other symptoms that can cause significant impairment. I've seen how all this affects my child and I. My child's outbursts are often extreme. She has bad behavior and cannot regulate emotion and functions poorly socially. This is hard for us at family gatherings and when it comes to school and friends.
By Kayla Hofer5 years ago in Psyche
