One foot in front of the other

I don't think there is a word in Psychology that carries as beautiful a meaning as Resilience. How many times have we fallen, repeatedly, and yet, with each adverse situation, we have grown stronger. Even when the road seemed endless and insurmountable, we were surprised by our own ability, which we thought we didn't possess, to rebuild and rise again. Resilience, in a nutshell, encapsulates this ability. It is a word that we should incorporate into our daily lives from now on.

I understand that at times, life presents us with challenges that seem insurmountable. Some might argue that being resilient in such circumstances is almost impossible. However, we can learn from every experience, and with each setback, we emerge stronger and more determined to conquer the world. Through this article, we aim to cultivate resilience, to grow and fortify ourselves internally, so that when life throws its curveballs, we know how to bounce back (wink emoji).

I can and want to be resilient. What should I do?

Being resilient does not mean that you do not experience pain; on the contrary, it is the ability to acknowledge it, confront obstacles, adapt, overcome them, and grow stronger in the face of traumatic situations. This translates into improved mental health and emotional well-being, enabling you not only to find comfort within yourself but also to understand that nothing in the world can hold you back.

Unfortunately, there are moments in life that hit us hard, such as the loss of a loved one, the consequences of war, or receiving a diagnosis of a disease. It is true that the world may seem to be falling apart, and the concept of resilience we are discussing today may feel distant and unattainable. That is why it is important to take your time, process your emotions, analyze the situation, and when you feel ready, lift your head, put on your boxing gloves, and step back into the battle. Overcoming challenges should be our life motto.

Resilience is something to which we all have access. You just need to believe in it and cultivate it. Here are some mechanisms for effectively coping with adversity:

- Work on building my self-esteem, learning to love myself, and trusting my abilities to face any situation.

- Recognize the problem, take responsibility for it, and be honest with myself.

- Set clear objectives and goals in life, determining what I want to do and how I will achieve it.

- Continuously strive for self-improvement and challenge myself to develop new skills.

- Analyze each adversity, assess what is within my control and what is beyond it, find the positive aspects of each situation, and seek creative solutions (Plan A, Plan B, even Plan C, as many plans as necessary without giving up).

- Learn from difficulties and grow with each experience, as there is a lesson to be learned from everything and everyone in life.

- Always strive to do good and establish relationships based on respect, affection, and honesty. Remember, what you give is what you receive (as they say in the movie Mamma Mia! (2008), "It's called karma, and it's pronounced 'ya'!"). Even if others don't reciprocate, continue giving your best because sometimes people simply lack affection and need a helping hand to foster resilience.

- Surround yourself with social support and a positive environment that promotes resilience. Seek relationships characterized by trust, mutual assistance, and the ability to withstand challenges.

List of films to watch that will help you cultivate resilience:

Resilience allows us to set aside negative thoughts. This concept provides us with the opportunity to adopt a humanistic perspective on the often cruel world we inhabit today. It instills the faith we need to acknowledge our individual mechanisms and effectively confront challenges.

The movies listed below depict adversities that unfold from the opening scene until the very end. However, their protagonists will demonstrate that resilience is not an unattainable feat.

1. In search of happiness / The Pursuit of Happyness

A film directed by Gabriele Muccino (2006)

Chris Gardner (Will Smith) is a man who fights day after day against the vicissitudes of a life that does not treat him well, in order to achieve the welfare of his son Christopher (Jaden Smith). Minute after minute the film shows us increasing obstacles that he has to face, however Chris never gives up. It tells us 118 minutes of the daily life of a man who undoubtedly constitutes the personification of the word resilience.

The film is based on the life of Chris Gardner, a man with an incredible story of self-improvement, who has been going through difficult times since his childhood. But that each obstacle made him giant.

Resilient quote from the movie:

“The future is uncertain, absolutely, and there were many obstacles, twists and turns to come, but as long as I kept moving forward, one foot in front of the other, the voices of fear and shame, the messages of those who wanted me to believe that I was not good enough, would be calmed down".

2. Frida

A film directed by Julie Taymor (2002)

The renowned Mexican painter Frida Kahlo faced many adversities in her life, however, she never gave up in the face of pain, on the contrary, an even stronger capacity for survival developed in her that made her the icon she is today worldwide. This film, with a duration of 123 minutes, reflects the complex life of Frida (Salma Hayek) since before her accident, and how with that bold character that characterized her, she knew how to have a positive and developing vision of life that allowed her to overcome every obstacle. Despite the fact that Frida has been questioned throughout history, we cannot deny that she is undoubtedly a great example of resilience.

3. 127 hours

A film directed by Danny Boyle (2010)

A movie based on true events, which makes it even more impressive. The plot addresses the 127 hours that Aron Ralston (James Franco) spends trapped in a canyon in Utah where he falls canyoning. His right arm is trapped under a stone preventing him from getting out. Many are the vicissitudes that Aron has to go through, however, he shows immense willpower accompanied by enormous sacrifices that he must make to try to escape.

Believe me, it's worth watching these 94 minutes that reflect a story as amazing as Aron's.

Resilient quote from the movie:

“Don't give up Aron. Do not give up".

4. 12 Years a Slave

A film directed by Steve McQueen (2013)

It was 1841 New York, and Solomon Northup (Chiwetel Ejiofor) was a black carpenter and violinist who enjoyed a free life with his family. After a few drinks with two men on a tour he is drugged, kidnapped and sold into slavery away from his loved ones. Solomon's life changes drastically, and the freedom and identity he once possessed disappears to instead go through 12 years of slavery filled with physical and verbal abuse. Northup does not rest and shows us, in the 134 minutes that the film lasts, a capacity for perseverance that will make him mobilize his behavior in the search for his freedom.

5. La vita è bella/ Life is beautiful

A film directed by Roberto Benigni (1997)

I don't know about you, but every time I watch this movie, my chest tightens and tears flow uncontrollably, just like in its well-known final scene (depicted in the photo above). It is a profoundly moving story that, for 116 minutes, transports us to the somber years of the Holocaust in Italy. The protagonist, Guido Orefice (played by Roberto Benigni), is a charismatic Jew who, along with his son, is sent to a concentration camp due to their heritage. In this unfathomable reality, Guido must undergo a profound transformation, finding solace in optimism, imagination, and the pursuit of a positive outlook, all to shield his son from the brutal truth surrounding them. Undoubtedly, this movie is a timeless classic that showcases not only resilience but also an incredible and creative ability to recover from unimaginable adversity.

Resilient phrase from the film:

“With will you can do everything. I am what I want”.