The loneliness of the human being

Have you ever had those days when you wake up feeling down, not wanting to talk or see anyone? With an almost scary need to be alone, to immerse yourself in the solitude of your home? I understand you. It is normal and more common than you might imagine. This feeling, I would say, is even necessary to develop and enrich yourself as a person.

The human being is a social being by nature. They need interaction and communication with others for the formation of their personality. After all, this is what sets us apart. However, it is also necessary to have a certain dose of solitude, of absolute silence, where only your thoughts are your company, to reflect on yourself, your desires, and the activities that you may fear expressing in public. Loneliness is sometimes a good companion. But when does this behavior border on what is "normal"? Note that I put "normal" in quotes due to the controversy and complexity surrounding the term. When can we definitively determine what is normal and what is not?

Stay with me until the end if you want to know more about this topic, or if you simply need a good movie that reflects and helps you understand the internal struggle you experience on those days. Perhaps these recommendations can be of assistance to you.

Loneliness: A Common Phenomenon?

Loneliness, despite being the absence of social interaction, should be observed from a more optimistic perspective that doesn't view it solely as a negative feeling. Instead, we should consider the diverse opportunities for personal growth that arise during moments of solitude.

From the moment we are born, society instills in us the fear of loneliness, of being alone, or of losing someone. It is undeniable that this feeling of loneliness can bring about sadness, longing, or despair because, as we have already seen, we are inherently social creatures who develop through interaction with others. However, not everything about our lives is social. It is necessary, at least once a day, once a week, or once a month—whatever time you, as an individual, need (which may differ from others because we are unique and different beings)—to find solitude. Reflect on what you have achieved in your life and what you aspire to achieve. Meditate, try to quell the internal fire, or discover that perhaps the work you have been doing for years is not ideal for you. It is in these moments of solitude that you may discover that painting, dance, or another activity best represents you. Loneliness undoubtedly fosters autonomy, helps you develop skills independently, and allows you to see the world with a different, perhaps deeper, perspective. It is in these moments of solitude that you come to understand the true value of things.

We must clarify that excessive loneliness can have various negative consequences for individuals. We are discussing here the moments and spaces of solitude necessary for self-discovery and introspection, but once this need is fulfilled, it is important to return to interaction and social contact with others.

What Activities Can I Do in These Moments of Solitude?

The activities vary depending on individual preferences and characteristics. However, here are some suggestions that can bring pleasure, mental well-being, and help you make the most of these moments of solitude. Rather than viewing them as the absence of others, see them as opportunities for growth and enjoyment.

Now, let's move on to the list of five films that explore the theme of loneliness from different angles, offering valuable lessons. These films may present behaviors that seem strange to some but "normal" to others. I encourage you to explore them on your own.

1. Taxi Driver

Directed by Martin Scorsese (1976)

Starring Robert De Niro, this classic film follows Travis Bickle, a Vietnam War veteran who, consumed by loneliness and chronic insomnia, takes to the streets of 1970s New York to rid them of evil. Jodie Foster also delivers a remarkable performance as a 12-year-old prostitute whom Travis wants to rescue. Considered one of the greatest movies of all time.

2. Her

Directed by Spike Jonze (2013)

Featuring an outstanding performance by Joaquin Phoenix, the film tells the story of Theodore Twombly, a lonely man who finds love and happiness in a relationship with Samantha, an artificial intelligence virtual assistant (voiced by Scarlett Johansson). It offers a reflection on modern relationships, increasingly devoid of physical contact. The film received critical acclaim and won several awards, including an Oscar for Best Original Screenplay.

3. Christine

Directed by Antonio Campos (2016)

This film explores the real-life story of Christine Chubbuck, an American journalist who committed suicide while live on air in 1974 at the age of 29. The movie, featuring an excellent performance by Rebecca Hall, delves into the loneliness and depression that Christine experienced due to various events in her life.

4. Shipwrecked/ Cast Away

Directed by Robert Zemeckis (2000)

Starring Tom Hanks, this widely-known film follows the story of Chuck Noland, a FedEx systems analyst who becomes obsessed with his work, neglecting important aspects of his life, including his relationship. After his plane crashes, leaving him as the sole survivor, he finds himself stranded on a deserted island, completely alone. Through facing his own emotions and fears, he discovers the true value of things and learns to grow. Tom Hanks delivers an exceptional performance that earned him a Golden Globe for Best Actor in a Drama.

5. Le Samouraï/ The Silence of a Man

Directed by Jean-Pierre Melville (1967)

This classic French film starring Alain Delon portrays Jef Costello, a stoic hitman who carries out assignments with professionalism, loyalty, and silence. As with any film, there is always a twist. Costello, a man with a solitary life, finds himself entangled in a mission where he becomes a target of the police due to a witness and a dubious alibi.

"There is no greater solitude than that of the samurai, except perhaps that of the tiger in the jungle"