Funny

The Voice from the Coffee Machine
Andrei woke up half an hour later than planned. He grumpily hit the alarm clock, which had once again become the enemy of his morning, and yawned as he headed to the kitchen. The only thing that could bring him back to life was a strong, hot cup of coffee.
By Nataliya Vdovenko10 months ago in Humor
The Great Avocado Uprising
It all started with a simple grocery run. Greg just wanted an avocado. That was it. A single, ripe, reasonably priced avocado. Maybe some chips. But fate, or perhaps the avocados themselves, had other plans.
By Faceless Lim10 months ago in Humor
The Closest Exit May Be Behind You. Runner-Up in Absurdist Awakening Challenge.
My ponytail whipped behind me as I sprinted to Terminal C. There was no way I could miss my connecting flight. Dodging screaming children and reckless travelers, I stumbled to gate C24. The jetway was empty.
By Alyssa Musso10 months ago in Humor
Digesting Words
Heavy rain continues to pour, creating red puddles of goo. I don’t have another name for it. It has the consistency of blood, but I’m unwilling to investigate.
By JBaz10 months ago in Humor
Aisles of Absurdity
In the sleepy town of Quirkville, where even the lampposts hummed forgotten jazz tunes, a perfectly ordinary Tuesday morning was about to be transformed into a spectacle of absurdity. Harold, an unassuming accountant with a penchant for mismatched socks, set out for his weekly grocery run, unaware that destiny had conspired to rewire the fabric of his mundane existence.
By Cai Fox10 months ago in Humor
Johnny McGory. Top Story - March 2025.
Shall I tell you a story about Johnny McGory? Shall I begin it? That’s all that’s in it. Oh, don’t go pulling such a face on me. That one always made you laugh when you were a kid, and I don’t mean to imply that you’re a goat now. Ahh, there’s a smile.
By Alexander McEvoy10 months ago in Humor
The Dad Joke Showdown
It was a quiet Friday evening at Charlie’s apartment. The kind of night where the air outside was crisp, and inside, the only thing louder than the hum of the refrigerator was the laughter of friends gathering for what could only be described as “The Ultimate Dad Joke Showdown.”
By Chxse10 months ago in Humor
A Funny Thing Happened to Me After Work the Other Day
I’m about to dust off a real old vaudevillian chestnut. A funny thing happened to me after work the other day… You always hear that line or some variation of it on TV or in movies whenever they bring out a hacky comedian—“A funny thing happened to me on the way over here…”, “A funny thing happened to me the other day…”—and it’s always followed by some really corny old joke that’s been done to death like, “A funny thing happened to me on my way here to tonight: a guy comes up to me and he says, ‘I haven’t had a bite in days!’ So I bit him!” or “A funny thing happened to me on the way here: a guy walks up to me and he says he hasn’t tasted food in over a month, so I says to him, ‘Don’t worry; it still tastes the same.’”
By Frank Macaluso10 months ago in Humor
Just Walking My Dog
Bob yanked the dog leash from the tabletop. It slipped from his butter-covered fingers, but he managed to catch it in a heartbeat while also smacking his knuckle on the underside of the wood. Sucking in the pain (and his pride) he gestured to the door. “Come on, Muggles,” he said. “Time for walkies.”
By Euan Brennan10 months ago in Humor
Immersive Art
Unlocking my front door, I entered my apartment and slammed the door as hard as I could. I was sent home early from work because I was placed on administrative leave for the third time this year, and it was only March. Well, at least it was still with pay, but one more infraction for whatever reason this quarter, and human resources told me they’d have to terminate my employment. To say I was pissed was an understatement, though.
By Mother Combs10 months ago in Humor
Detour
As Michael reversed out of his driveway and began the familiar drive towards work his stomach rumbled. He had been too nervous to eat this morning, his mind swimming with the presentation he would have to give later today. He regretted it now as his stomach's emptiness made itself known, but it was too late to go back. The boss wouldn’t be happy if he was late. This presentation, his boss had insisted, was of the utmost importance.
By S C Goode10 months ago in Humor
Egg-stra-sized . Runner-Up in Absurdist Awakening Challenge.
That time I went to Toronto for a weekend visit with my friends, the drive back didn’t go as expected. Whenever I am in Canada, I stock up on Canadian honey and snacks at Costco. I’m not the only American doing that. There are no Costco stores around Buffalo, so when I shop at the Niagara Falls Costco, I see many cars with the US plates.
By Lana V Lynx10 months ago in Humor