comedy
Comedy and humor in the sexuality space.
The End of Fear and Loathing
We had plenty of sparkling water, along with enough high-octane Starbucks pit stops mapped out for the whole trip — minus that wasteland north of Hot Springs. But the road ahead was long and hilly and I didn’t bring my reading glasses…now where did I put my CBD oil?
By Jean Campbell4 years ago in Filthy
It is With Much Regret That I Must Inform You I Cannot Accept the Position of Your Boyfriend
Author's preface: While digging through my vast archives I stumbled across this humor piece from 2018. It was a response to an article in which the author informed a sometimes hook up partner that she would accept him as her boyfriend were he to meet a series of very specific requirements. She wrote it in the form of a job acceptance letter in which she was the company CEO and he the job applicant. It was hard to tell if she was being serious or if it was all tongue in cheek. In any case I had to respond in kind and what you see below is that response. Unfortunately I cannot locate the original article upon which this was based and did not link it for reasons I cannot recall, but most likely simple laziness. This post was particularly popular (for me) and it spurred a lot of discussion in the comments section. Not sure if this is going to make the 600 word cutoff or not so going to pad this preface with just a couple of sentences worth of nonsense in order that I might play it safe. Hmmm. Maybe just one or two more filler sentences and then I should be good. This would be the second filler sentence. And, to play it really safe, here is the third. Thank you six hundred word count minimum for another waste of thirty seconds of mine, and whoever is reading this, day. Dumbest rule, ever. In any case, enjoy!
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Filthy
Losing My Virginity in Public
As a teen, I wasn't overly into sports. I wasn't one of the many kids at my school with an obsession for skating, or surfing, or passive activities like watching anime or playing video games. I wasn't a big reader nor addicted to the cinema. I found the other boys at my high school were interested in a wide variety of things, but myself, I only cared for the girls.
By Regular Person5 years ago in Filthy
My Filthy Mind
Before I start, don't dare tell me that you don't have a dirty mind. Yes...I mean you, standing by the fridge and thinking "That cucumber is thicker than my mans dick!" or "My female crushes nipples taste as good as those cherries look." You cant tell me that you people who write the filthiest stories have not been there, because in order to write a filthy story in the first place, one must have a filthy imagination, and please, do excuse me (or not!), but I do have a very filthy mind when it comes to both men and women, and to you embarrassed to read this, I stick my tongue out and say "Nah! nah! nah! I'm too hot to handle for you!"
By Carol Ann Townend5 years ago in Filthy
St Nick The Dick
Foreword By Robbie Smithson I think its obvious Santa is an asshole. There’s a song called Grandma got run over by a reindeer. Hmmm, who drives reindeer again? OH, I think its Santa Claus, aka St. Nick. Mr. Vehicular manslaughter himself. So why was Santa not paying attention enough to notice grandma, before she got ran over. I’m gonna have to guess he was drinking and driving a sleigh. That is strike one, St Nick… you asshole.
By Luke Simpson 5 years ago in Filthy
I was a 5th Grade Sex God
Hi. My name is Stuart and I would like to invite you to travel back to the 1980s with me so I can share with you, how my odd little brain had me fooled into believing that I was the greatest womanizing virgin that had ever walked the Earth. I was convinced that my woman loving would go down in history, overshadowing tales of the great Don Juan Demarco and Gene Simmons of the rock band, KISS, who was my god and idol that I so excessively had posters and pictures of, plastered on every wall in my bedroom from the ripe age of 6 years old.
By TANK TANKENSTEIN5 years ago in Filthy
Greatness Is in the Hole of the Beholder
There are two main reasons why Gideon always chooses the penthouse suites of the Palm d’Or hotel chain. One are the voice activated blackout window panels: to keep his one-night stands fast asleep as he quietly hotfoots it out; that way, he never risks awkward and pointless morning-after banter. The panels are impeccable at their job; not a sliver of light creeps in, and there is never any talk of next encounters.
By Pedro B. Gorman5 years ago in Filthy
Handle With Care
Alfie really fancied Emma, and he was quietly confident that she felt the same way about him. Their kissing and fumbling had become quite intense of late, and Alfie felt sure that it was time for him to make the next move. He had no reason to doubt that she would respond in a mutually satisfactory way when he did so.
By John Welford5 years ago in Filthy
