Teenage years
A Letter I’ll Never Send
Dear B.B.W., I think I’m going insane. I think I’m in love. Is there truly a difference, Lady Aphrodite, or will I need therapy? I can’t help myself imagining you in instances I didn’t know I’d ever want, yet suddenly I want to kiss you in the rain. Suddenly I want to watch the sunset, hold hands in a corn maze, throw flour at one another, and receive flowers on my birthday. In second grade, I swore an oath to never have crushes on stupid boys. I wonder what that girl would say to me now, gawking over the tall nerd. I’ve tried to get over myself but I can’t handle just being your friend. I want something more. I need it.
By Abby Campbell4 years ago in Confessions
All About My Crazy Life
Introduction: My name is Sabrina Siren Black. This is my witch name. I use tarot cards and I also use this name to remain anonymous because I am not comfortable using my real name. I am apart of/ created a coven called Children of the Shadows and I am also the High Priestess. My boyfriend is Puerto Rican and Italian and everyone in my family outside of my immediate family will be really pissed off because he isn't white since my family was raised with a different generation. My boyfriend knows that I am a witch since I have laid ALL of my cray out for him since day 1. I had asked him out, and even though he knows all of my craziness and the craziness of my family, he still agreed to date me. We started dating while school was still going. I am now a senior in high school and my boyfriend is now a junior in high school. We met in the Auto Collision class (car painting class) that the school offers. Also, we met 3 weeks after school started because I enrolled late due to a COVID quarantine. I was so upset since I was worried I was going to end up in virtual school again. I didn't want to spend one of THE most important years of high school. I spent a majority of my junior year taking tests that I didn't take in freshman and sophomore year and also the PSAT's and the ACT (twice). I hope this year is a lot different since it's my last year in high school. Most of my friends are now juniors except for one person but she ended up moving to another school because her parents decided that. There's talk she may be coming back to the school she left but who knows? Her parents are still saying it's undecided. My hope is that she comes back considering senior year won't be the same without her. I may have met her 3 weeks after I got to the school, but with the time we had, we became best friends. Hell, less of best friends and more of a family. She is like the mom of the group and her boyfriend would be the dad of the group. She calls me her baby and I like that she does since it proves to me that she cares for me and the moment she first called me her baby, I knew we were going to be even closer than we already were and guess what? I was right. When she had to leave, on her very last day, we cried and cried because of how much we were going to miss each other and now she lives almost 2 hours away. Hopefully, her stepdad won't be a dick and will let her and see how much she needs her Colonial High School family needs her and misses her. I had my childhood stolen on June 20th, 2020 at 4:30 am because I was raped by someone I truly trusted. After that, I became different and considered cutting myself to feel SOMETHING, ANYTHING and I didn't. I have been sober, as a result, since January 2019. In that time, I have turned away from the Catholic faith and turned to the fact that I am a psychic medium and can hear, feel, and see dead people and I can read tarot cards. I have also turned to witchcraft since that became an outlet for me.
By Sabrina Siren Black4 years ago in Confessions
There are a thousand different ways to cry
I’ve been a “crybaby” to many since I was two. I was always labeled as sensitive or weak, because my favorite way to express myself was through tears. But after years of being called everything under the sun for expressing myself, I chose to hide my feelings behind a mask. So I decided, why not write those many moments down here. The moments that I hid from the world and the moments that made me feel the most vulnerable.
By M4 years ago in Confessions
All My Boy's
Growing up I never felt the love my heart and soul desired, the love my body wanted I’ve always had high hopes that I’d find it. I’m 19 and have only come across something about 3 times in my life. Ever since I was about 5, I’ve always wanted a fairy tale type of love, you know life something in the books or the movies. I’ve always had a vison that I’d fall in love young, and we’d grow up together and get married all that kind of good stuff. Well, life didn’t turn out the way I planned my cards were delt to me way different that I had ever expected. At the age of 5 I had this massive crush on a boy that lived across. His name was Cameron, he was about 7. Blonde hair-colored eyes about 2/3inches taller than me. I remember we kissed in the back of the apartments, just a little peck on the lips because we didn’t want to get caught. He ended up moving soon after. I didn’t really care for boys much after that. I was the oldest out of 4 kids, and the only girl. So eventually boys got on my nerves because I was around them all the time 24/7. I didn’t have a thing for another boy until I was 7, I was in the 3rd grade. This is when I found out I had a thing for bad boys. He was a grade or 2 above me. He was bad in school and at home, he wanted to fight all the kids around. But something about him being bad was attractive. I eventually didn’t like him anymore and went on with my life. I had ended up moving new schools, something closer to the house. At this new school there was a boy, a boy who liked me very much, I can’t remember his name, but he was in the same grade as me and I just happened to be lucky that we ended up in the same class. We kind of sat next to each other. He was brown skin, taller than me by a couple of inches. He had long hair and loved to play tether ball. I remember when we decided to be ‘’ boyfriend and girlfriend’’. We started to play on the playground a lot, and he would even stop playing tether ball just to come play with me. I thought we were just good friends, but everybody in our class kept asking us if we were dating and id just laugh, because I was only 7. But one day after lunch we decided to play tag with a couple of our friends and we both wanted to run together. We stopped to catch our breath and he told me, ‘’ all the boys keep saying were dating’’ and I stopped and said ‘’ its kind of like we are but were just friends’’ and he responded, ‘’do you want to be my girlfriend?’’ and I said ‘’ do you want me to be your girlfriend’’ he said ‘’yea’’ and from that day on I was in my very first official relationship. I think back and laugh because even the boys back in that time era had more class than anybody does today. I eventually ended up moving schools and moved to a different city. I was starting 4th grade. I went to a pre academy, which was 4th – 8th grade. My brothers were still in what they considered elementary. This was the first time I would ever be going to school alone because my brother was a grade behind me, so we had always gone to school together. It wasn’t that bad because the schools were literally right next door to each other, there was just a fence in the middle of the school field to separate us, so at lunch I’d go to the gate and see my brother playing kick ball. I eventually got used to going to school alone and stopped worrying about my brother. I would get home and hour earlier than my brother would, so I would meet him at his school bus, because it dropped him off in the front of our apartments, one day he got off the bus with this light skinned boy. To me he was the cutest thing I had seen in a while. Even though he was only in the 3rd grade I was determined to get him. He eventually started coming over to our house and asking for my brother to come outside. They would go outside and play, do what boys did. I had friends of my own, so I’d go play with them. I eventually told my brother I liked his friend and him being a good little brother at the time. He went to school and put in a good word for me. I was 8, soon to be going on 9 in a couple of months. I had ended up writing a note to him and told my brother to give it to him at school. I eventually ended up getting a note back from him asking me did I want to be his girlfriend. Of course, I responded to his note saying yes. So, we started dating, it was hard because my grandma was very strict and I would have got my ass beat if she found out in was out here liking on boys, but it eventually got easier because his mom and my grandma had become good friends, so we played outside with him all the time. We would write notes to each other every single day, boy do I miss the old days. He would make me things at school and give them to me, I thought I was living my fairy tale. Well one day his mom was having a birthday party for his little brother, I thought shit was going well. Until my brother had ended up getting into trouble on the school bus, now like I mentioned before my granny was strict. She didn’t play that shit. My brother came straight home and got his ass beat. My grandma would always check our backpacks if we got in trouble at school, so she decided to go through his backpack well luckily, she only pulled out his homework that he never turned in and went to the room to whoop him because if she had gone to the bottom of his backpack, she would have seen all the notes I was writing to that boy. I know I’m probably wrong for this, but I went in his backpack took out all the notes I could find and threw them under our couch, but I couldn’t keep them there because my grandma cleaned the house everyday so she would have found them, I had to come up with a plan and fast. My grandma eventually took us to the party 10 minutes later. I had my plan in my head I just didn’t want to get caught. So, I waited until I knew my grandma was comfortable and told her ‘’ granny I left my jacket at the house can I go run and get it?’’ I knew she would say yes because she was old and didn’t want to walk all the way back home. She gave me the key and told me to hurry up. So of course, I run to the house in case she changed her mind, I opened the door and lock it right behind me as I went in the house so that way if she was behind me, I would know. I went in the kitchen grabbed a grocery store bag and stuffed all my love notes in the bag and tied it up. I got my sweater and put it over the bag just in case she was at the door. I got out the house safe she was still at the party. I locked the house up and stuffed the bag in the bushes by the house. I knew the gardeners would come Sunday morning and throw it away when they cut the bushes. I went back to the party like nothing happened. This is where I started to get ahead of myself because I thought we’d be ‘’in love’’ forever. Me and this boy started to get into arguments over everything and I should have known I was going to be a toxic bitch when I got older because when he would be mean to me or break up with me, I would go be a total bitch to his little sister and now when I go back and think about it, I should have been nice to her because she was really only a kid. This boy and I were off and on until I was in the 5th grade and decided to cut the relationship completely off before I got to the 6th grade. Let’s fast forward sometime. In the 6th grade I was doing well in school my grades stayed at a C or better. My life changed a lot in the 6th grade I was starting to become way more mature and kept myself looking good. I had always worn a bra since I was in the 2nd grade even though my boobs didn’t come in until late 5th grade. By time I was in the 6th grade my boobs were a B cup. Probably the biggest in my class specially to have an ass to, you’re probably thinking I had all the boys all over me. I did but I didn’t at the same time. It was weird. Boys were shy, so now that I think about it, it was ok. Well, there was this one boy I started to have a big crush on when it came around fall. He was a very tell dark skinned. He wasn’t skinny, but he wasn’t fat either. He would always come to school looking nice in a fresh white or black t-shirt. He has the cutest smile with a baby face but the most grown looking face. I remember he was a bad kid in school but had such a big heart. He didn’t take anything from anybody. One day he got into some trouble in school and came into the classroom playing music. The girl sitting next to me said ‘’oh that’s my song’’ and he looked at her and said ‘’no its not, you don’t know this’’ and he looked at me, for some reason he scared me that day, and I think he knew he scared me because that same day he kept looking at me as if he felt bad for me, but I thought he just wanted to keep intimidating me. Even though I was scared that day is when my feelings for him got strong. I had ended up telling one of my friends that I thought he was cute, and I liked him. Word had eventually got around to him and one day in class he kept smiling at me and I would blush so hard that my face turned red, and I’d end up smiling super hard. My heart couldn’t stop racing and my hands were sweaty. I can’t remember if he passed me a note or came up to me at lunch, but I’ll never forget he said ‘’everybody keeps telling me you like me’’ I smiled and said ‘’yea I think your cute’’ he said ‘’ well do you want to be mine’’ and I responded blushing so hard my face was hot and I said ‘’yes’’ we’d sit next to each other in class he’d look at me all day and have me smiling from the time I got to school until the time I left. In history class we watched movies and he would come sit next to me because the teacher let us switch our seats. He’d come across to come next to me and I’ll never forget how gentle he was to be a big mean boy. So, the teacher would turn off the lights. And he was scared to hold my hand so I remember I would sit with my hands on my lap because I was nerves. All my friends were smiling at me which didn’t make anything any better. So, he started to rub on my knee because he didn’t want to just grab my hand. His hands were so big, and I knew he was nerves because they were so warm, I could feel it through my jeans. So, he slowly worked his way up to my hand and grabbed my hand and started holding my hand. I felt like the prettiest girl in the classroom because he decided to be so slow and gentle with me and it was just the cutest thing ever. So we had a good relationship for about a month or 2, until I got into it with 1 friend and she went around the whole school telling lies about how I was fake, and was talking shit, a couple days later I just couldn’t believe all my friends that I’ve been knowing since the 4th grade turned their back on me like nothing, he ended up giving me a note on our way to lunch saying he was breaking up with me and I just threw the note in the dirt because I was truly hurt I couldn’t believe this bitch had done this to me when I let her in my house to have dinner with my family multiple times. I eventually got over it and knew who my real friends were, and they stuck by my side every day. Well at least until we ended up moving again. We moved states this time, I was 3hours and 19 minutes from my friends. I was absolutely devastated. It took me a couple of months to get back into my groove of feeling comfortable around people I didn’t know. I had to make new friends. We’ll I made a couple friends, but it was never the same. The school year of 7th grade was coming to, and end and I had to prepare to go to the 8th grade my last and final grade in middle school. Well as I thought I had it all planned at as usual, life took a turn. I’ve always loved going swimming since I learned to swim. Well, we moved to a place that was called little Mexico, you should know why it was called what it was called. Well, there was this boy, very good looking first crush I had in a long time. I was 13 at this point in mt life. We’d go swimming with him every day, play basketball, just do what kids do in the summertime. My mom and grandma were still strict on me. Probably even more so that I was already entering puberty and had a monthly period. My body started to change in was I hadn’t noticed until I didn’t have a gut anymore. I grew a couple of inches taller; I was about 4’11. Still very short to be going to the 8th grade. I realized my ass got bigger and my waist got slimmer, and my shorts were starting to fill in all the right places. I always wore crop tops because something about showing a little stomach drove the boy’s crazy. He was always so nice the boys made store runs every day. And even though I never asked for anything he’d always bring me something back, it could be chips or a drink or even and ice cream he always got me something. Something about him was different from all the boys I had ever talked to. We’d sit outside on the stairs and talk for hours. Well, I had later found out that he was 16. Of course, I would have gotten in trouble because my family always thought the worst. But I didn’t care I was willing to go down if it meant I was going to be happy. he knew I started to like him I could tell he was feeling the same way because he started to get closer, he wanted to always touch me. It could be my hand or my arm. But nothing to obvious. Well, I had made a new friend that summer she was about 16/17 but really had my back. She knew I liked him, and she’d always make it so obvious, but he was a boy he didn’t catch on. but a couple days later that all changed, this day was like I’ve been waiting for this my whole life. Well at least that what I thought at the time. This day we decided to play basketball first, well they played, and I watched. It was so hot we decided it was time to get into the pool. He looked at me different this day. A way he’s never looked at me before. We swam in the pool for hours. I eventually had to get out and go eat and shower because it was getting late, and I just wanted to hang out since the sun had gone down and it was cool enough to just enjoy the air. We sat on the stairs and ended up alone. Everyone had disappeared, we to his and chilled inside with his sister. His sister and I were in the same grade and went to the same school, so it wasn’t weird at all. We ordered pizza with a couple of other friends and sat at the table telling jokes. By the end of the night, we were alone again and this time in front of his door. We were sitting there talking a while and I decided it was getting late and I should go home. As I get up to walk away, he stands to, I go hug him and as I do I tell him ‘’I’ll see you tomorrow’’ and as I walk away, he pulls me by the arm back to him I asked ‘’ what are you doing’’ he just grabs me by my big red blushing cheeks and kisses me. I thought I was a princess in a Disney movie. I had never felt so magical in my life., for once I finally felt my age. In that moment I wasn’t a little girl anymore, I was somebody’s girl. After a kiss goodnight I went home, got comfortable only to see my phone is going off. Its Facebook, I said to myself ‘’who could this be? Do they not see what time it is?’’. I did what any regular person would do, I picked up my phone to see what it was, and it was him texting me telling me goodnight and how I was the prettiest girl, and he couldn’t wait to spend time with me tomorrow. Being around him just made feeling like I was living on cloud 9, with everything I’ve ever wanted. He wanted me to be a princess, and a princess is what I was. I never wanted the days to end. We’d text all night until we feel asleep. Nothing could get in the way of me being happy. we decided to spend 4th of July together. Who doesn’t want to spend holidays with the person they ‘’love’’? We went swimming but I didn’t want to swim all day, so I came up early and got dressed for the day. He decided to come in my house, with my brother while I was getting dressed. Not a big deal, until all three of us decided to stay in the house. My brother went to the bather me and him decided to stay on the balcony. My mom came in and seen us standing together. My whole day turned upside down. I wore a scarf as a belt for style, but I wore it to the side of my pants. My mom calls me to her room and asks me ‘’what are you doing?’’ I responded ‘’nothing just talking’’ she looks at my pants and asks me ‘’why is your belt to the side of your pants?’’ I said ‘’because this is how I styled it’’ she proceeded to say ‘’I hope you guys weren’t up here doing anything you’re not supposed to be doing’’ and if you know you know every time a parent says that to you, it makes you nerves even if you didn’t do anything. So, for the rest of the day, I decided to keep my distance from him because io didn’t want my mom to think anything. My whole family decided to come over that day. We’ll it was almost time for the firework show. Who doesn’t like to watch fireworks? So, all my friends grouped up and we found a good spot to watch fireworks. While we were chilling on the balcony of the stairs he decided to come and hold me from behind and we watched fireworks. I fell more ‘’in love’’ by the second. The tighter he held me. He griped me in all the right places. I couldn’t even come to terms with what was happening I just never wanted it to end. Well while I was in a ‘’love’’ daze my older stepsister decided to come look for me. Oh, she found me, but she found me all hugged up and enjoying myself. He eventually let me go, and he let me go just in time because about 3 minutes later here comes my mom screaming…………. To be continued
By Simpllyy 174 years ago in Confessions
Youth camp of southwest Ohio
I remember as a teenager I would enjoy going to this southern youth camp in morrow Ohio. At commissary they had some delicious nacho's with warm cheese, always the perfect cheddar cheese warmed up on the side of the tortilla chips.
By Angelina F. Thomas4 years ago in Confessions
Love story
It was just another of our usual gatherings. That day we decided to play hide n seek. And it was ___ den. The moment ___ went to count, he held my hand and took me somewhere to hide. I didn't know what that place was but yes it was magical. We were hiding there and as usual having our talks. He the one talking talking and talking and I like always just lost in him. Suddenly I heard someones footsteps, I thought its ___. And in an instant I put my hand on his mouth to shut him so that we don't get caught. But He KISSED it. I don't know what happened to me but In an instant I withdrew my hand and came out whereas in that moment I wanted something else. I wanted just to be with him. But I came out running and surrendered myself in the game. After that moment, I became quite and started ignoring him. I was lost. I didn't know what to do, how to react to what just happened! So what I did was to act NORMAL like nothing happened. Then the clock struck 6 and it was time to return to our homes. As I was just stepping out, I heard him say I will drop Nimisha! My heart skipped a beat. I said No I can go on my own, you don't have to. He just didn't care and said its too late I will drop you atleast till the metro station! I agreed thinking the way is not too long I can manage by not talking to him. But who knew what is going to happen. And then he suddenly said we will go on foot. I also wanted to and also didn't want to but I reluctantly said OK. In The first few steps we both didn't speak a word and had an ackward silence between us. Then he finally said I AM SORRY!
By Pierre4 years ago in Confessions
How I Beat Death
It all started off on a humid summer night. It was just me and my cousin driving around town late at night doing the normal teenager stuff. It was about 2Am at this time, us being dumb kids we decided to smoke at a park, it seemed like a pleasant park in a good neighboorhood. We rolled a blunt and hotboxed the car everything went good until we seen a silver ford explorer pull into the park entrance, everybody can guess who it was just by the car. The police drove slowly over to my car mind you I have tint so they can't tell if someone is in the car yet, I look over to my cousin I can feel his heart beat through his eyes I coulda swore we were going to jail. I looked over to my cousin and told him they didnt turn on the lights yet im gonig to just try to drive off and see what they do, and of course they turn on the lights and pull us over in the middle of the parking lot you probably thinking awe thats not to bad you just got a little weed on you out past curfew but no thats the complete oppisite. My cousin came from a rough side of town so he always kept a gun on him, out of the blue he decided to put the gun underneath my seat all in a matter of seconds. Then I hear a door slam I look out the mirror and see a sheirif and the town we were in was had a smaller population and was in between to big cities so they didn't have a police station the sherifs just patrolled the town. Back to reality the sheriff knocks on the window I roll it down he instantly smells the weed but I wasn't freaking out yet beacause we were in illinois and weed is legal. So i go on to tell him weed is legal and you can't search my car but I had to give him my drivers liscense to prove I was eligable to be driving and he said " it is absolutley not legal for you guys at least you are both minors". so we go on talking he said the words that haunt me till this day, " so when my partner gets here were gonna do a quick search of the car and call your parents. minutes later his partner arrives we get out the car no hands cuffs or anything he just pats us down finds nothing and then he moves onto the car. This man is literally tearing my car apart looking for stuff then I hear the words "oh wow what do we have here". he pulls out the mac11 my cousin had on him but the officer pulled out the clip adn said so your essentailly walking around with a mac11 bb gun. I couldnt help but laugh and look at my cousin with a distressed face. they gave us a ticket for smoking the weed and just took the gun for evidence they called my mom and auntie to come pick us up good thing my dad lived down the street they took us there for the night and god was on our side. But heres when the story has a drastic change of events, I stayed up the rest of the night because tomorrow was my first day of work of my very first job ever. i was excited, morning came i dropped off my cousin all dressed for work had the music blasting what could go wrong. Then as im driving I get on a road called wadsworth its a 2 lane road that merges to 1 lane. Im already in the left lane so no need to merge there is a white chevy malubau in the right lane just next to me she slows down so I slow down thinking she is trying to merge but there is a gravel drive way on the right side of the road so I speed up thinking she is turning into there then all of a sudden I see a car turn right in to me trying to hit a U-Turn in the middle of the road, I swerve in to the lanes of on coming traffick god bless there wasnt any cars coming at the time, but the car keeps going and mind you Im doing at least 60 at this time in a brand new dodge challenger the car hits my back wheel I spun out and started to flip I swear I thought that was my going to be my last time on earth. as my car is flipping in the air I put my hand to the roof and said please god help me, after I rolled one more time the car landed up right I look at my body and feel fine, then I look inside the car and my radio was on fire I unbutton my seat belt get out the car and just take a minute to just breathe. Then a black lady gets out the car and comes up to me and says "how the F*ck are you not dead". I finally realized what happended and I look at my car it was tottaly destroyed, at that point i wasnt even thinking about me I was thinking about my baby all smashed up and windows broken.so now I analyze the seen to find the person that hit me I see the white chevy and young girl no older then me gets out the car and I just sat there in disbelif she didnt even come over to apollogize but that black lady was my gaurdian angel I call her that to this day she called the cops before the girl tried to flee the scene. emt and the police arrive shortly after they took me to the hospital I wasnt even hurt foreall I was just trying to get a check at his point you feel me. But heres the crzy part I got to the hospital everything is good i check out to be fine then an officer comes in the room and says ''sorry to tell you son but that young lady had no drivers license or insurance it wasnt even her car". she ended up going to court had to pay $20k in fees but thats it. I was out a job and a car, got ptsd from the situation and she just kept on with her life like nothing happend. but its been a little over 10 months now Im still recovering i went and got baptized the same weekend and just thanked god I was still here. Hope yall like the story its 100% true I know its some flaws in my story but I literally just typed this in 30 minutes. thank yall and enjoy...
By Dre Harden4 years ago in Confessions
There Are 7 Tips For Mastering Time Management
Time man that is all about working smarter, not harder. It’s more than scheduling your time; it’s maximizing the productivity of each day so you can get more done and achieve your goals faster than ever before. Here are seven tips to help you master Time Management so you can get back to doing what matters to you—and have more time to enjoy it!
By Unmotivated World4 years ago in Confessions
Toxic love
I started my first job at 16, and I worked in fast food. 6 months into working I was told that we were getting a new manager from another store. All I knew about him was that his name was Drew and he was transferring over because of a gnarly breakup with anther manager. I had no idea that he would not only change my life, but change me as well.
By Poptart4 years ago in Confessions
