satire

Politicians provide us with all of the comedy gold. We're only mere curators.

Calling Moscow - 6
This phone call took place on January 7, 2022. “Hello, Vlad?” “Yes, Donnie,” to the side, “Shit, I forgot to tell Peskov not to put him through today.”
By Lana V Lynx4 years ago in The Swamp
My Corona
This satirical rant was written and first published in the opening days of the Covid-19 pandemic in 2019. Its headers should be sung to the tune of My Sharona by The Knack. Listener discretion is advised.
By James Garside4 years ago in The Swamp
Omar's Diary for November 2021
To quote a member of the servant species in the popular culture of the entertainment industry, Arnold Schwarzenegger, “I am back”.
By Alan Russell4 years ago in The Swamp
I love Ford trucks because they bring me closer to my dead grandpa
I'm a real, honest American. I believe in the fundamentals: tradition, adherence to tradition, and taking offense to those who try to improve on tradition. If it was good enough for our forefathers, it's good enough for us. I'm not some statue-toppling leftist who gets their rocks off by erasing the lessons of the past.
By A. George4 years ago in The Swamp
I’m A Black Man
I am a black man. Therefore give me money, privilege, and status because, you know, I am a victim. All white people MUST clap on this article, comment, and highlight points you agree with; otherwise, I will think you are a racist.
By Frederick Emerson4 years ago in The Swamp
The White Male Narrative
Little girls are made of sugar and spice, but boys are made of something else entirely; Especially white boys. With so many magical stories around us; tales of bravery, rich fantastical universes intertwined with deep wounds and intricate circumstances, the most compelling tale is the one right under our noses: The Narrative Of The White Male.
By Bonnie Joy Sludikoff4 years ago in The Swamp
Post-Thinkers and the World of Tomorrow
Imagine, it's the year 2045, a mild 104 degree summer morning in Eugene, Oregon, and before you even wake-up, you already have over one-hundred thousand likes for a tweet you didn't write on a story you haven't even read yet.
By JLB4 years ago in The Swamp
Diner Oranges To Unionize
This week, after a 19-year battle in California, Democratic Governor Gavin Newsom signed legislation granting collective-bargaining rights to more than 40,000 oranges. The slices of oranges on the sides of your steaming plates of eggs are launching a new campaign to unionize. They are not just lukewarm sponges used to soak up the layer of sizzling potato grease and frigid watery chunks of parsley, they are members of society that demand rights. These are mothers, fathers, spouses, and children, just like you and me. They state that the battle began in order to combat the misuse and misallocation of their talent, energy, and flavor.
By Julia Neal4 years ago in The Swamp
Let Them Eat Cheese
Let Them Eat Cheese Ok, I am retired, and I got bored writing about serious things and thought a little humor was in order.
By roy Slezak5 years ago in The Swamp
The Secret to Eliminate Self Evident Truths And Live Your Authoritarian Dreams
Hi, I am Alexo Googlard, creator of FIST UNITED, the premier final solution think tank for bringing order out of chaos. I am here to give you the key to unlocking the Rubik's Cube standing between you and that revolutionary plot to distract the masses and fulfill your plans for insurrection. That’s right now you can be among the 1% of initiates in A Brave New World who are living their totalitarian dreams!
By Althea Veritas5 years ago in The Swamp
Donald.Trump.Is.Dead
I’m sitting on a bench, just off the rough of hole number 6, at Trump’s golf course. The Secret Service just hauled away the body. They told me to clean up the mess on the ground, but I don’t think I will. I don’t want to be infected with the same worm that consumed him. There’s probably eggs in that pile of poop. I’m still trying to process the events of the last hour. Actually, all the things that have happened, ever since I knew the Donald. He was one of the most arrogant bastards I have ever worked for. In a way, I loved him.
By Steven Bridenbaugh5 years ago in The Swamp
Nibbles to 12th May 2021
DAVID AND GOLIATH (cotd) The wine Box (David) vs Tesco (Goliath) In Nibbles (4th May 2021) I wrote about a local independent alcohol retailer having its very survival threatened. A national retailer was applying for a licence to retail alcohol from its own premises twenty metres away. The hearing with the local authority for this application took place on 4th May and extremely sadly I heard that Tesco, the national retailer, has been granted a licence.
By Alan Russell5 years ago in The Swamp