Moscow's Calling - 31

This conversation happened on September 6, 2024 as it was decided that Trump's sentencing in the hush money trial will be delayed until after the November election.

"Hello, Donnie?"

"Hello, Vlad, how are you?" [chipper]

“You never called me back about Macron, Donnie, as promised.”

“Well, didn’t he let your guy out on bail?”

“That he did, Donnie, that he did. But I wanted him to be released completely so that I could get him home.”

“Do you want me to call Shrimp again? I can totally do that.”

“Not now, Donnie, let’s wait and see what the French decide to do with him. But thank you for the offers. Do I hear you are in a good mood?"

"I am, Vlad, I am indeed. I've been exonerated. Completely exonerated, so it's a good day."

"Exonerated from what?"

"The f*cking hush money case."

"Oh really? I heard that your sentencing was postponed but not that you were exonerated."

"Same thing, Vlad, in my book. Same thing. I won't go to jail before the election, and after the election I will just stop and cancel all trials and investigations against me. Stop and cancel."

"That is if you win the election, Donnie."

"Not if, Vlad. I will win. They have no choice but elect me. No other choice, Vlad."

"Who they, Donnie?"

"The American people. The Biden-Harris choice is horrible for them. So horrible! They have no choice, they will elect me."

"You are not running against Biden any more, Donnie."

"I still can't believe they did it to him, Vlad! Just kicked him out like that. He should just show up at our debate and claim his nomination back. Can you believe it, how they simply threw him out of the party! And Kamala is so horrible, Vlad! They have no choice but to elect me."

"You do understand that some things cannot be simply manifested, right, Donnie?"

"Not for me, Vlad. I can manifest anything. I've been doing it all my life. I'm good at manifesting, the best actually. So I'm manifesting my electoral win.”

“Well, good luck with that, Donnie.”

“Is that sarcasm, Vlad?”

“Of course not, Donnie. I’m rooting for you and sincerely hope you will get elected.”

“And I hope you will help me, Vlad."

"I am doing what I can but you must have heard that a major part of my disinformation operation has been blown up by your DOJ."

"Can you believe the audacity of that, Vlad? They are claiming that all the Republican talking points have been created and paid for by Russians. By you, Vlad!"

"Right? Like Vivek said, as if Republicans have no head on their shoulders and can’t see what is really going on. But it was a big blow, Donnie, that operation was significant.”

“We can probably do it through Truth Social, Vlad. It’s doing very well, much better than I expected. In fact, so much better that I need to think about how to make it even better for me.”

“Don’t try to sell your social media network to me, Donnie, you know I don’t use them at all. It would be weird…”

“I’m not weird, Vlad, not weird at all.”

“Who said you were weird?”

“The f*cking Tim Walz! Imagine, me weird. I happen to be a solid rock, I'm not weird. And JD is a good, solid guy. Not weird at all. And Melania is my wife.”

“How is she, by the way? I haven’t heard anything about her for a long time.”

“She is Ok, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“Yes. I haven’t seen her in quite some time. She went to New York City to put Barron to school and stayed there. Just stayed there, like she is going to school herself. But she is still my wife.”

“Why are you bringing it up, Donnie? I know she is your wife.”

“Well, some people say she wants to leave me, get a divorce. But she’ll never do it, Vlad. She’ll stay with me until death. Until the very death. To a certain extent, life is what you do when you are waiting to die...”

“Wait, Donnie, are you doing your famous weaving on me?”

“How did you know, Vlad?”

“That’s what you told recently yourself at a rally, that you talk about like 9 different things at the same time, and then brilliantly weave them all together.”

“See, I can’t help myself, Vlad. That’s how I talk and the fake news media say I’m babbling. But I’m weaving, Vlad, isn’t it beautiful?”

“It certainly is, Donnie. Ooops, I’m getting another call. Gotta go now, bye, Donnie!” After abruptly hanging up, “His weaving gives me a headache.”