Moscow’s Calling - 30

This conversation happened on Sunday, August 25, 2024.

“Hello, Donnie!” [chipper]

“Hi, Vlad. You sound happy.” [grumpy]

“And you do not. What’s on your mind? I saw you had a great visit to the border.”

“Yeah, I thought so too. It was a tremendous visit, great visit. But then it turned out that they took me to the part of the wall built by Obama! Can you imagine, Vlad, Obama built the wall too! Can you believe it? And now the media all over it, mocking me! I hate him so much!”

“You should fire some people, Donnie.”

“Yeah? Like who?”

“Whom, Donnie, you should fire the people who worked your schedule. They should have done their research properly about the wall.”

“Ohhhh, Vlad, what if it was sabotage?”

“From your team? Then you should not just fire them but take care of them permanently, if you know what I mean.”

“But what if it’s someone from the local organizers, secretly working for Biden?”

“You mean Kamala? You are not running against Biden anymore.’

“No, not Kamala. Biden, she has no power yet. Not so much power or money as to buy people. Not so much.”

“Have you seen her fundraising numbers, Donnie? She is well ahead of you.”

“No, Vlad, she has everything in the open. I have a lot of money coming in that is in the dark. A lot of secret money, Vlad!”

“Really? From where?”

“My billionaires. My good buddies, billionaires. After she said she’d raise corporate taxes to 28%, a lot of them started coming to me. And crypto, Vlad, so much crypto I don’t know what to do with it.”

“You do remember you owe me two billion dollars, right, Donnie?”

“Thanks to your reminders, I do. How can I forget, Vlad, when you bring it up every time we talk? Ooooh, would you take it in crypto?”

“Sure, Donnie. But in crypto it’ll have to be three billion because I will have to convert it into real money.”

“You must be kidding me, Vlad, that’s like 50% more than I owe!”

“You just said you had so much crypto you didn’t know what to do with it.”

“Yes, but in millions, for the campaign, Vlad!. Not in billions! Just millions, only Elon can get loans in billions and not pay them back.” [chuckles]

“Seems like Elon is just like me, right, Donnie?”

“What do you mean?”

“I also gave you billions and never got them back. Only requests for more.”

“That’s not fair, Vlad. So not fair! You know I’m good for it when…”

“Yeah, yeah, when you sell your Trump Media stock, I remember. Anyway, it’s not what I’m calling about.”

“Oh, yeah? What is it about then, Vlad?”

“Do you have any leverage with the French government, Donnie?”

“You mean with Shrimp?”

“Yeah, Macron. Maybe some old favor he owes you?”

“Maybe. Why?”

“The French security services arrested my tech billionaire, Pavel Durov.”

“Oh, I’ve heard about it. Today. Both Tucker and Elon wrote about it, something like the darkness coming down onto humanity.”

“Yeah, and freedom of speech suppressed in Europe.”

“Yeah, yeah, freedom of speech is important. I thought this Telegram guy was on your wrong side, Vlad?”

“Yes and no. He went to Azerbaijan to meet with me, but I couldn’t see him then and he stupidly went to France. Should have gone back to the Arabs.”

“So now you want to talk with him?”

“Yes. I want him back.”

“Another prisoner exchange?”

“Can’t wait that long. For the prisoner exchange, he needs to be tried and convicted in France. That could take months. I can’t wait that long, that’s why I’m asking if you can influence Macron.”

“Well, I can call him any time. Any time I need anything, he told me. Let me talk with him, Vlad, I’ll let you know what he says.”

“I will appreciate it, Donnie. Have to go now, bye. Oh, almost forgot to congratulate you on the RFK Junior endorsement!”

“Yeah, not much of an endorsement, he is even weirder than Vance. Can you imagine, so weird!”

“Yeah, yeah, I remember the bear story. Really have to go now. Please call Macron.”

“I’ll do it right now, Vlad.”

“Thanks. Bye, Donnie.”

“Bye, Vlad,” after hanging up, “It’s good to do favors for him. Let me call Macron…”