happiness
Happiness, defined; things that help you find happiness, keep it, and share it with others.
Hello Self Care, Bye Self Destruction
After a year of sulking, denial, despair, depression and a copious amount of wine and seltzer’s I am bull dozing full force into 2021 with a conscious and focused effort on my mental wellness. I am going to manifest positivity, stability, independence and consistency. How will I accomplish this, you ask? I couldn’t seem to find it at the bottom of a bottle or in my many attempts at a flailing relationship in 2020. So I’m going to dig deep into myself, expose all the wounds, worries and insecurities and examine them, tend to them and allow them to heal. The new me, not a different me, but a stronger and unbroken me, is going to practice self-care, follow my passion and for a dash of healthy, practice moderation in all things I enjoy. I am going to be 35 this year and throughout my life I thought I had experienced the worst of the hard knocks and heart aches and chocked each up to a life lesson that I have learned from. But it’s so easy to get lost in the moment and let negativity and toxicity envelope you, you forget that you can’t control what happens to you in life but you can control how you react to every situation. And that’s life, a domino effect of situations and events. And let me tell you, 2020 is what kicked me right in the ass to realize that. I had self-destructed completely. A 5 year relationship ended with a boom, I up rooted my kids over night to my sister’s house and instantly lost my independence. I had no car, no job, and I blamed everyone else for it. There was nothing but broken pieces that surrounded me and I lived in it, breathed it and eventually became it. I detached myself emotionally from the people who loved me and who were there for me and became obsessed with what I had lost. Until something changed in me. It was New Year’s Eve, just minutes away from 2021, the clock was ticking towards midnight. I was sitting with my younger sister in the backyard, looking up into the sky, I was wrapped in a blanket and crying, and she looked at me and said, “I’m not trying to be mean, but when are you going to stop being like this?, I miss the happy you”. And her words resonated right through me. I had that ah ha moment. I was so stuck on what I had lost, , the loss of my routine and what I thought I needed to feel alive, wasn’t that at all, I was holding on to an intangible past. Then I started writing that night. Writing anything and everything on my mind, my thoughts, poems, stories, what I would say to him. It was a release. Writing has always been my passion. And I had stopped because I had lost myself in my self-assembled trench of darkness and exchanged the therapeutic effects of writing for a real bad wine head ache in the mornings. I feel free and light when I put pen to paper, and through writing, I felt a weight lifting little by little, day by day. I started practicing acts of self-care. Started listening to positive thinking pod casts, even downloaded one of those inspirational quote apps, there’s an app for everything. I have started therapy, opened up about my feelings to my sister and mom and I stopped hiding under all the debris of what ifs and if I would haves... Not to forget, I cut back on drinking, comfort sweets and binge watching Netflix, everything in moderation they say. A glass of red wine is good for the heart but a bottle everyday will probably give you cirrhosis of the liver and it cuts out the problem of drunk texts to your ex. That’s like a double resolution. I learned through therapy that the trauma of a break up or anything that changes your life dramatically, can flood your mind with only the good memories, it’s your brain trying to protect you, but it equates to loss and grief causing sadness, anxiety and depression. And that’s ok and its normal, but only you have the power to defeat it and purge it. Process it, cry, write, shop, take a boxing class and let it go. There is a reason I left that relationship and a reason why I was able to endure the emotional roller coaster and moments of madness and questionable decisions that brought me to this point in my life. Once I could grasp that concept, it helped to clear the fog that kept me in such a dark place and allowed me to see clearly. I was free to embark on a new journey the one I have always searched for. It was right in front of me now, a new life to build from scratch, however I want, I am the curator. My goal for 2021 is to practice self-care through my passions, writing and spending quality time with my kids and doing what I enjoy, keeping a positive mind set, and living in the moment, otherwise I’m cheating myself and my kids out of the most important memories of life, which is found in every second. So say a positive mantra in the morning, go get your hair and nails did, go out with the girls, don’t get too drunk, remember moderation, do something that challenges you and make no apologies for being you, we are all human and were made to make mistakes, we were crafted to be perfectly imperfect
By Monica Nissing5 years ago in Motivation
Anew Me
It was about 10pm EST when I began to journal, falling asleep unintentionally. "This bed is so comfortable!" I thought to myself and smiled. Wait a minute. "If I'm thinking to myself that means I'm up right?" My eyes squeezed shut as I stretched my arms above my head and my straightened my legs underneath the warm blanket. Groaning, I rubbed my legs against the soft grey fleece. My knee hit the connector part leading down to a wire that was plugged into an extension cord. Electric blankets are the best I thought to myself as I slowly sat up in bed. "What the-" I said, looking around the room confused. I see my dresser and bed and that's my tapestry on the wall, but this room looks slightly different.
By NappyJewelz5 years ago in Motivation
What are the Powerful Benefits to Know & Understand your Confidence?
What is Confidence? Definition of confidence: A feeling or belief that you can do something well or succeed at something. A sense and belief that someone or something is right and can succeed. The feeling of being sure that something will happen or that something is true. Merriam-Webster
By Heidi Fitzsimmons @RiseLoveLive5 years ago in Motivation
Avocado 🥑 Alo
Exactly one year ago, I moved from town (Honolulu) to the North Shore of Oahu. After spending most of my life in Honolulu, my wife, Kiyari, had randomly been looking at rentals on CL on the Northshore. We were fed up with town. Honolulu had become so overly crowded, expensive, dangerous, and stressed.
By J. P. Harrison5 years ago in Motivation
You Are Your Customer
There was a collective 'turning the corner' moment as the clock ticked down and we bid good riddance to 2020. I certainly felt it, did you? That emotional roller coaster, life threatening, mentally challenging year that we just escaped by the skin of our teeth was officially behind us, once and for all. Get thee behind me!
By Heidi Bacon5 years ago in Motivation
How One Good Deed Changed My Life...
A good deed is an act or a gesture that is fulfilled by an individual or a collective. What makes a good deed so virtuous is the intent that an individual(s) possesses which will lead them to accomplish a particular action or a particular gesture onto someone else. No good deed can be viewed as “too small of an act” because every “act of service” can impact and go a long way for others. Good deeds come in many different forms, from many different people and can occur at any given time. Good deeds can also vary anywhere from holding the door open for a stranger to donating blood or to even donating an organ of yours. Since we are only aware of what goes on in our individual lives we are often blinded to the many struggles and challenges that are experienced by the people around us. This is one out of the many reasons why I personally feel that it is important to help others in ways that we are able to. Not only does this promote a sense of unity between individuals, communities and societies. But when our actions reflect altruistic behaviours our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health enhances which consequently improves our well being. Committing to and fulfilling a profuse amount of deeds that can benefit others generates a social system, which is founded from the kind actions that are accomplished by one or more people where generosity and gratitude are both present. This is similar to “Pay It Forward” which is a famous movement. “Pay it forward” was created in 2007 by “Catherine Ryan Hyde” who is a famous author. However Blake Beattie who was inspired by “Catherine Ryan Hyde” created “Pay It Forward Day” which is celebrated each year on April 28th. “Pay It Forward Day” inspires individuals worldwide to join this movement and to “Pay It Forward” for someone in their community. This can be anyone that is in your community or someone you encounter that you may feel is in need of and/or deserves some extra kindness in their life. Even though april 28th is the official day for this movement there are three hundred and sixty four days aside from that one so you should not limit yourself to spreading kindness solely on that particular day. To put it into perspective “Pay It Forward” can be described as a “ripple effect” where kindness is being spread and good deeds are being committed among many different individuals. Instead of directly paying back the person who helped you it is suggested that you “pay it forward” so you fulfill a good deed forward onto a new person. This creates a domino-like effect where each person that is impacted by this movement Pays it forward”. This can influence others to participate in it which in the fullness of time can stimulate and create a chain reaction. “Pay It Forward” is very inspirational as this movement is surrounded by feelings of compassion, generosity and joy. The impact this movement has is very large globally and it draws us closer to one another by making us feel a sense of belonging and by allowing us to feel cared for by one another. This is significant since the people who have been on the receiving end of the “Pay It Forward” movement are able to share their personal experiences with the people around them and spread awareness of this movement. Seeing as it is currently 2021 and technology is at its all time high individuals have a wide range of resources which allow them to: connect with others, share their stories and to hear about the interactions other people have experienced regarding this movement. These resources include but are not limited to the following social media platforms like: Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, Blog Websites, TikTok, Twitter and many more. In addition to this, the very first time I had ever heard of this movement was seven years ago in 2014 when I was just ten years of age. My mother and I were on a road trip when we decided to stop at Tim Hortons for some food. As my mother was approaching the window to pay for her food purchase she had realized that she had forgotten her debit card. For this reason my mom was going to cancel our food order when she approached the window. After my mother told the Tim Horton’s worker that she had to cancel the order due to insufficient funds she was quickly reassured as the worker told my mother that our order was covered. My mother and I were confused about how this could even be possible as my mother did not have her debit card on her at that time. The worker at Tim Horton’s told us that the driver in front of us had paid for our order and told us to “Pay It Forward” onto someone else. My mother thanked the worker at Tim Hortons then she proceeded to catch up to the car that had paid for our order. After what seemed to be a 15 minute parked car conversation my mother and I were educated on this movement from the family that had previously helped us and this encouraged me to make a difference in the lives of others in any way that I could. Not too long after, my mother and I decided that each year we would store all clothes of mine that were still in good condition that I could no longer fit in and we would ship these clothes to less fortunate individuals in Jamaica along with items and toys. We have done this each year since 2014 up until now and we do not plan on stopping anytime soon. I am forever grateful for the family that helped my mother and I out that one day in 2014 as it changed my life for the better. I can only hope that the clothes that I give each year will do the same for those who need it. We are deserving of everything good this world has to offer and if I can assist in bettering the lives of others I will without hesitating.
By Shadaé Brown5 years ago in Motivation
It's A Matter Of Perspective
Perspective, we all have one. Each different to the next. Crafted, manipulated and created in adolescents. Your very own upbringing created the person you are. As the fleeting seconds pass by you come to realize that you are all alone.
By Jonathon Larkins5 years ago in Motivation
My BEST Life
Today is January 25th, 2021 at 6 o’clock in the morning. It’s still dark out and as I sit here in bed, eyes closed, I can feel a stirring whirlwind inside my chest. It doesn’t feel good. It doesn’t feel bad. It feels unknown...or maybe undecided. It’s an unsettled wind that was turned up by the hurricane of events that was 2020: a mixture of chaos, anger, and loss. A breakdown of life as we know it, leaving pieces scattered about. Over the past year I have been feeling disconnected, moody, and heavy. And when I look at all those pieces scattered about, I am acutely aware that whatever my life previously was, it wasn’t what I truly want, or need. It’s too busy, too messy, and too bogged down with STUFF. I’ve been SPENDING too much, EATING too much, and WASTING too much. All this time, money, and energy spent with little to show for it that I actually VALUE. But in these early days of 2021, there is a sense that, in some ways, a storm has settled. And as I take an internal survey, I can feel that in between the cracks and rough edges lies the answer: the little pieces of GOOD laying around. The little pieces of what I value and hold dear: my FAMILY and FRIENDS, my HEALTH, my love of NATURE and respect for the ENVIRONMENT, my CREATIVITY, my GARDEN. This is MY potential. This is my compass. This is my way forward in 2021. With this new air of possibility, I’m not going to rebuild my OLD life. I’m going to identify the most important pieces of myself and stitch them together to form my BEST life. A life where my day to day has PURPOSE and most of my steps are leading me towards the life I WANT to lead.
By Leah Marke5 years ago in Motivation
Happiness in a Pandemic
Everyone around the world has experience the effects and side effects of the Pandemic. Life has shifted and changed as we know it. So many people say aloud to themselves, “Geesh", can’t wait until things get back to normal”. The truth is things have changed, and our lives have been turned from many different angles, but he must learn to adjust, by finding healthy and Godly lifestyle changes. We have experienced the pandemic individually, some loss loved ones, some decided why to wait to get married hey, let us just jump the broom right away, some experienced break ups, some invited a new baby into the world, some lost their jobs, some found a new career, and some purchased their first home. This pandemic brought on the good and the bad. Through it all, wouldn’t you like to find happiness and hope??? Where is your sanity???
By J.Clark5 years ago in Motivation
