Wit
How to Survive a Family Road Trip Without Turning Into a Cryptid
There comes a point in every person’s life, when they must embark on the most dangerous, character-defining journey of all... the family road trip! Forget Everest... Forget the moon landing... A road trip with your relatives is where legends are made and human beings mutate into mysterious highway creatures, sustained entirely on Fun-yuns and spite.
By The Pompous Post4 months ago in Humor
White House Doctor's Confirm Donald Trump Dying of Evil
White House Doctors confirmed today what many have long suspected, President of the United States Donald Trump is dying of evil. The disease is terminal, and there are no treatments and no cure. At a press conference surrounded by global media, white house chief medical officer Dr. Timothy Stephens, read a prepared statement saying. “It is with great sadness that we are prepared to announce today we have finally converged on a diagnosis for the mysterious illness that has plagued President Trump for much of his life, but recently turned much more serious. We had initially suspected frontotemporal dementia as the most likely cause based on his symptology which appeared to align closely with the seven stages of that disease. As a reminder that disease begins with mild cognitive changes followed by changes in behavior and difficulty with language. At that point the patient begins to see a greater impact on quality of life and personality changes. In the final stages we see significant memory loss followed by severe cognitive decline. President Trump’s early symptoms such as chronic incontinence requiring him to wear a urinary catheter and urine collecting bag running down the side of his leg at all times while in public, along with his strangely stilted manner of standing and walking, and ever more frequent non sensical incoherent ramblings all supported the hypothesis of frontotemporal dementia as the disease from which he has suffered for so long now.
By Everyday Junglist5 months ago in Humor
Chuck The Ambitious
Once, not so long ago, there was a small marshmallow chick. A purple marshmallow chick to be exact. His name was Chuck. He spent his days amongst his four purple marshmallow brothers and sisters in a small box covered in plastic. Chuck knew that he would never leave this prison-like home until the spring day when some wee boy or girl begged their mothers or fathers for a sugary treat. And the freedom that would follow would be short and sweet. But this knowledge did not stop Chuck from having dreams. Big dreams.
By Hayden Harner5 months ago in Humor
Inspector Hayden and the Case of the Missing Medication. AI-Generated.
*Story edited via AI with ChatGPT* In a twist of fate, Shaun, the oddball scribe and Dungeon Master who had worked at Cosmic Ranch Animal Clinic once upon a time, found himself magically transported back to the hectic desert clinic. Met with a mix of shock and relief, his arrival brought with it knowledge and wit which ensured a new and fresh perspective on the case of the missing medication. With his scribe talents and background in D&D, he very swiftly joined the team of strange colleagues. He was even able to illicit a few chuckles from Inspector Hayden and Aaron.
By Hayden Harner5 months ago in Humor
Inspector Hayden and the Case of the Missing Medication. AI-Generated.
*Story edited via AI with ChatGPT* Inspector Hayden Warner, an irritable veterinary technician with distinctive green hair, was known as “The Pharmacy Tech” at the bustling animal hospital, Cosmic Ranch Animal Clinic. She maintained the pharmacy with great care, filling medications for their canine and feline patients. What set her apart, however, was her mysterious passion for witchcraft. She kept a deck of Supernatural-themed tarot cards in her small corner of the pharmacy. They provided her with wisdom and guidance. Her coworkers thought of her as eccentric but they couldn’t deny her unrivaled dedication to her craft.
By Hayden Harner5 months ago in Humor
HR
Thirty years in HR. That’s not a career—it’s a sentence. I’ve survived mergers, lawsuits, and the Great Passive-Aggressive Email Epidemic of 2011. I’ve seen things. Heard things. Mediated things that would make a therapist weep and a lawyer’s bill double. I’ve aged like a fine wine—if that wine had been left in a breakroom fridge next to someone’s forgotten tuna salad.
By Lizz Chambers5 months ago in Humor
