Sarcasm
White House Doctor's Confirm Donald Trump Dying of Evil
White House Doctors confirmed today what many have long suspected, President of the United States Donald Trump is dying of evil. The disease is terminal, and there are no treatments and no cure. At a press conference surrounded by global media, white house chief medical officer Dr. Timothy Stephens, read a prepared statement saying. “It is with great sadness that we are prepared to announce today we have finally converged on a diagnosis for the mysterious illness that has plagued President Trump for much of his life, but recently turned much more serious. We had initially suspected frontotemporal dementia as the most likely cause based on his symptology which appeared to align closely with the seven stages of that disease. As a reminder that disease begins with mild cognitive changes followed by changes in behavior and difficulty with language. At that point the patient begins to see a greater impact on quality of life and personality changes. In the final stages we see significant memory loss followed by severe cognitive decline. President Trump’s early symptoms such as chronic incontinence requiring him to wear a urinary catheter and urine collecting bag running down the side of his leg at all times while in public, along with his strangely stilted manner of standing and walking, and ever more frequent non sensical incoherent ramblings all supported the hypothesis of frontotemporal dementia as the disease from which he has suffered for so long now.
By Everyday Junglist5 months ago in Humor
Turns out caffeine + chaos = a book. Who knew?
I Accidentally Published a Book. Oops. So, it happened. My first book is out in the world. Rom Com Published. Official. Done. It’s out there wandering the wilderness of the internet, wearing its little digital shoes, trying to find kind readers who will give it shelter, coffee, and maybe a good review.
By Tina's Blossom Life5 months ago in Humor
Human Bodies: A Squishy Design Flaw Waiting to Happen
Good evening, fellow meatbags! Have you ever stubbed your toe so hard that you suddenly believed in alternate dimensions? Or smashed your shin on a coffee table and wondered if bones can actually scream? Congratulations! You’ve just experienced the tragic comedy of human design.
By The Pompous Post5 months ago in Humor
Bad Drivers: A Field Guide to Vehicular Villainy
🚦 Exhibit A: Roundabouts – The Bermuda Triangle of Traffic The instant certain drivers approach a roundabout, their brains reboot. All sense of direction and purpose evaporates, replaced by pure panic. It’s like watching a flock of birds get flash-banged by a solar flare:
By The Pompous Post5 months ago in Humor
It’s August, and Santa Just Cut Me Off in Tesco
You know those moments when you stroll into your local supermarket, fully intending to buy boring essentials like milk, bread and maybe some strawberries (to trick yourself into thinking you’re healthy)… and then BAM—there it is. An army of chocolate Santas, stars, marshmallow snowmen, and suspiciously glittery gift wrap staring at you from aisle three. Excuse me, what month is it again? Oh yes—AUGUST. The sun is still burning my forehead, my flip-flops are still very much in service, and my iced latte hasn’t even considered turning into a tea with honey yet. But apparently, according to the great gods of retail, it’s already Christmas. And while I initially roll my eyes so hard I can practically see the back of my skull, I have to admit… they might be onto something.
By Tina's Blossom Life5 months ago in Humor
The Time I Tried to Adult and Failed Miserably
Introduction: Adulthood sounded great in theory. Pay your bills on time, eat healthy, have a clean apartment, maybe even have a plant that survives more than a week. I had visions of this perfect adult life. Reality, however, had other plans. My journey into adulthood began with confidence… and ended with a series of spectacular failures that left me questioning whether I was cut out for this “adulting” thing at all.
By Nadeem Shah 5 months ago in Humor
My Epic Fail at Yoga Class
Introduction: I’ve always considered myself somewhat graceful… well, at least in my own head. So when I decided to join a local yoga class, I imagined serene stretches, deep breaths, and maybe a hint of enlightenment. What actually happened was far less zen and far more… chaotic.
By Nadeem Shah 5 months ago in Humor
Alarm Clocks Are Gaslighting Me...
Good morning, dear readers! Or should I say “bad morning,” because if you’re reading this, you probably woke up to the soul-piercing shriek of your alarm clock. You know the one. The device you trusted to gently usher you into consciousness, but instead ambushes you like a SWAT team breaking down your door at 6:00 a.m.
By The Pompous Post5 months ago in Humor
