Sarcasm
Coins, Cards, and Catastrophes
“You know what? You don’t have to work anymore! You don’t have to wake up at 7 a.m., punch your timecard, or answer to your grumpy boss. All you need is a crypto wallet… or maybe just one little lottery ticket. Success is waiting! Riches are one scratch away!”
By Shehzad Anjum4 months ago in Humor
TECH REVIEW: The Check Engine Light Does Not Mean Your Engine is “On”
At The Pompous Post™, we pride ourselves on keeping our readers informed about the latest technological breakthroughs. Last month we reviewed the cutting-edge “Toaster 2.0,” which can not only toast bread but also your hopes and dreams. This week, we turn our gaze to a truly revolutionary innovation: the Check Engine Light.
By The Pompous Post4 months ago in Humor
Why Aliens Would Do Better to Avoid Earth in 2025
Landing at Mar-a-Lago Imagine this: It's a balmy September evening in 2025, and a fleet of shimmering saucers slices through the twilight over Mar-a-Lago, their hulls humming with the promise of universal truths. Out step the extraterrestrials—slender, luminous figures with eyes like nebulae, bearing gifts of quantum drives and peace accords etched in starlight. They're here for first contact, a grand unification of worlds. But before they can utter a telepathic "Greetings, carbon-based friends," a golf cart screeches to a halt. Enter President Donald J. Trump, resplendent in a red MAGA cap, flanked by Secret Service agents clutching NDAs. "Beautiful ships, folks—tremendous. But what's the deal? You got warp tech? Fusion reactors? Because America First means we get the best terms, or you're outta here. You're fired!"
By Francisco Navarro4 months ago in Humor
The Secret Lives of Garden Gnomes: What They’re Really Doing When You’re Asleep
For centuries, mankind has slept soundly under the false assumption that their gardens are tranquil places. Quiet sanctuaries of flora, chirping crickets, and maybe a bunny or two, nibbling on carrots. But recent evidence uncovered by The Pompous Post™ investigative team (me, one pair of binoculars, and a suspiciously long summer evening) has revealed the shocking truth: your garden gnomes aren’t innocent ceramic ornaments.
By The Pompous Post4 months ago in Humor
Surviving Monday Without Witnesses
The Alarm That Will Not Be Silenced The first sound you hear on Monday morning isn’t the birds singing or the gentle rustling of trees. No, it’s your alarm clock blaring like a war horn, reminding you that the world has decided to throw another Monday at you. You lie there, half-awake, convinced that surely the universe has made a mistake.
By Sahir E Shafqat4 months ago in Humor
Nothing about Australia is normal!
“Gidday mate!” “Howzit goin'?” These would be typical greetings you might receive when arriving on the fair shores of the land of Oz. Not to be confused with the Wizard of OZ, Australia is populated by a breed of animal called Aussies. Some people think the typical Aussie, if there is one, is weirder than the Wizard of Oz characters.
By Calvin London4 months ago in Humor
BREAKING: Nation’s Grandmas Unite, Declare War on “Unsatisfyingly Thin” Restaurant Napkins
A Crisis at the Dinner Table For decades, Americans have tolerated flimsy restaurant napkins that disintegrate at the first sight of soup, shred beneath the weight of barbecue sauce, and provide less absorbency than a damp Kleenex. But no more.
By The Pompous Post4 months ago in Humor
Competition
Heckling a comedian is never a good idea... You ever see room of professional comedians and they are all just laughing and having the best time because they are all funny and they enjoy each other's comedy? I love seeing that, I love the shared love of their craft and seeing them just have fun together, it's really amazing to watch.
By Raine Fielder4 months ago in Humor
EXCLUSIVE: Local Man’s Wi-Fi Network “FBI Surveillance Van #4” Finally Gets a Knock on the Door From the Actual FBI
For seven years, residents of a quiet cul-de-sac in Des Moines lived in the shadow of a running gag. It wasn’t a neighborhood watch, or a barking dog, or even the HOA’s obsession with measuring lawn length to the millimeter. No, the source of both pride and suspicion was a Wi-Fi network named “FBI Surveillance Van #4.”
By The Pompous Post4 months ago in Humor
