breakups
When it comes to breakups, pain is inevitable, but Humans thinks that suffering is optional.
What Happened?
My year started out like any other year: wishing I wasn’t the only one single in my family. I had just hit the 90 day mark at my new job and we had a team off-site meeting coming up so we had to make vision boards. The categories on mine were: Family, Relationship, Work, and Finances. My number one thing I wanted to work on this year was getting to know myself and feeling more comfortable in my own skin. I made the vision board and, of course, placed pictures of couples on there but didn’t have any high hopes of anything happening.
By Taylor Phillips5 years ago in Humans
Buried relationship
In these still moments I find my mind wandering to the graveyard of relationships long buried. While most I am happy are dead and buried one always stands out. The one that haunts me to this day. The one I destroyed from nativity of youth and pride. My last relationship had ended because my fiancé had found my poetry expressing my deepest desires and emotions. She threw it out and told me if she wanted her respect to not show emotion and be a man and suppress it. She eventually left me for a man she deemed more masculine. So, I was taught to bury my soul. I carried this knowledge to my next relationship. A funny thing about burying your soul is when you can't show or express an emotion it turns to resentment at the world. Being young and believing the stereotype that anger was the only feeling men could have I found it intoxicating. I was angry at having a job that was work I hated, I was angry at politicians who seemed to make a good living doing nothing but argue and make press conferences, and I was angry about my lot in life. I knew I could change my lot in life but, then I wouldn't be able to feel anger anymore the only emotion people deemed acceptable for a man. The next relationship saw something in me could tell I was suffering spent countless days trying to heal the pain, I carried with me. All she wanted was for me to feel safe expressing myself to her but, the lesson I had learned was ingrained to deep. I knew she wanted me to let myself feel and be whole again but, fear of losing her when she deemed me less than a man stopped me. Ironically it was this unwillingness to open up that doomed the relationship. For when she saw that I was unwilling, and it was not a matter of trust but of will that kept me this way she knew she couldn't save me and had to walk away. I was young, arrogant, and naive. This is why it haunts me. All I had to do was believe her when she told me it was ok to open up and trust that this time would be different. I threw away pure love in the name of fear and pride. I doubt she even thinks of me anymore in truth I hope she doesn't. I hope she found someone who can be what I refused to be but, still I regret the fact I had a chance at something amazing and lost it by my own fault.
By Thelomanious Skorinko5 years ago in Humans
This Place
And in that moment her heart started to beat out of her chest as all of their memories came flooding in. The tears the pain the frustration the love, she was overwhelmed with angst and cheer, to feel close to him again but only while being here. It wasn't the body of the person but yet the memories created with the person that created a feeling of a void. To know those memories would never happen again, and could never be replaced, that thought is what kept creeping in. She couldn't escape her feelings of guilt for being there without her, but most of all to be there with someone else. But she needed this like she needs food, she needed to sever her ties with her once known to be love, she needed to be free to do as she pleases without feeling guilt for doing so.
By UNpretentious5 years ago in Humans
Article: Trust is a Fragile Thing
Someone once told me that there is a saying that: "You can pick the right person at the wrong time." At first I didn't believe that saying because there is never a right person and life is unpredictable. Yet, I wish I could say that trusting someone is easy, that it's simple to love someone with all your heart and I wish I could say that relationships are easy. I wish that I could say dealing with someone's baggage is simple as fuck but it's hard and damaging. I know this because I know I've damaged people with mine, the same exact way they damaged me with theirs. But isn't that the price we pay for falling in love? Isn't that the price we pay for giving ourselves emotionally, physically, and mentally to someone that we barely know? I wish I could write and say that trusting and loving a person is easy but I would be spitting bullshit from my mouth. I wish I could lie and say that trust came easy to me...but it hasn't but it used too. Oh god...it used to slip into my hands so easily like water but even water starts to freeze and disappear.
By Alexia Villanueva5 years ago in Humans
How to get over a Breakup
Crucial steps no one tells you about when getting over a breakup: (especially during a pandemic) Step 1- Be miserable. Cortisol, not to be confused with Cortisone, is a stress hormone. It accumulates in every inch and cervix of your broken body and covers your eyes and ears from the inside out, masking your world. Expel it from your body through tears and sweat. If you are not crying you should be exercising, or basking in 100 degree weather, or in a sauna. Just let it out, feel snotty and look wet.
By Anairda Ochoa5 years ago in Humans
7 HELPFUL WAYS TO GET OVER A BREAKUP
Getting over breakups is difficult. While some breakups are a relief, others are devastating, especially when such a relationship has lasted for years. Breaking up is not the problem as much as moving on is. Some people find it very difficult to get past a breakup and can remain stuck for a long time. Getting over a breakup is quite easy with specific simple steps and effort. So, here are seven dating advice to help you get past a breakup.
By KarenSHoffman5 years ago in Humans
Being cheated on
Call me old fashioned but when your boyfriend gives you his claddagh ring and a key to his place that's a big deal, and then cheats on you the very next day, that's messed up. So I am in a new relationship but we have known each other for over 10 years. The timing was never right for us to be together. Either I wasn't ready or he wasn't or he was in a relationship or I was and so on. Finally the third time seemed to be the right timing, starting off a fresh clean state. It seemed like we were always meant to end up together. Growing older and more mature. Living life experiences, living in new places, working new jobs. He had always been in different bands. One day I am over his house and all his band mates are there. He is the singer of the band and he announces that his band is going to go on tour for 2 weeks. There is lots of people talking in the background, shouting and celebration going on. We are talking in the living room, sitting on the couch. He stands up and says "I want you to have this" takes his ring off his finger and puts it onto mine. "A symbol of trust and loyalty" he says. He raises my hand up so that everyone can see and says "Jenn is my girl" That was a very special moment for me, no one has ever made me feel like that before. He was leaving the very next day. I still felt a little uneasy about him leaving, can I really trust him to be faithful to me while he's away. He said he wanted me to stay at his place for the next 2 weeks until he got back as I sign that he trusts me. I agreed and again felt emotional and I was going to miss him. I would still feel close to him as I am in his home. He gave me a key to his house and it felt like a key to his heart. He says you've been threw so much you deserve this and I start crying and he wipes my tears away and we start kissing in front of all his friends. I could hear people calling us cute lovebirds in the distance. As I walk into the kitchen to get a drink one of his band mates starts talking to me, "So you and Mike huh? I said yeah and he starts asking me can I really trust him while he's on the road, he lives a party lifestyle, things will get wild and crazy. I feel like he will end up cheating. He drinks a lot. He's cheated on girls before. I respond I really don't know we will see. I didn't want to start to doubt and worry. It was getting late and I knew there would be a loud all night party and I was tired so I decided to go back to my house and I would see him in the morning before he left. I said my goodbyes went home and went to bed. I got a good nights sleep, I wake up early in the morning and check my phone to find out that my boyfriend ended up cheating on me with some girl at the party. Naked pictures were posted all over. I rush over his house there are still people crashed out hungover laying on the floor and show him the photos and go "Can you explain this?" He goes "I was drunk and what happens on the road stays on the road." I shout your not even on the road yet, you can't stay loyal to me for 1 whole day, you haven't even left your house yet! He goes it didn't mean anything I was messed up and not thinking" Ya you weren't thinking your a idiot, obviously you don't care about me and what you said yesterday was a lie. You don't cheat on your girlfriend, there's respect and loyalty. Why did you give me this ring then, I mean nothing to you. I can't trust you. He said "I'm sorry" I said "Your not sorry" You've done it before you'll do it again. It's over! I take the ring off my finger and throw it at him the key included. I walk out of his house upset and angry. Blocked him. 10 years of friendship means nothing, waste of time. Uncaring, unloving person, karma will come to him. He has since moved states and I would never welcome him back into my life. I have zero tolerance for lying, untrustworthy negative people.
By Earth Angel Jenn5 years ago in Humans
