Imagine if woolly rhinoceroses were still around today.

Imagine walking into your favorite fast food joint and instead of chicken and beef burgers, they had woolly rhinos on the menu. It may not sound appetizing now, but thousands of years ago, our ancestors depended on the woolly rhino for their meat. If you’re unfamiliar with the woolly rhinoceros, it’s been extinct for over 14,000 years, but we’re bringing it back! What would our world be like if the woolly rhinos existed today? Would you and your family be in danger, or would humans be hunting them down to make delicious Rhino burgers?

If the woolly rhinoceros never went extinct, what would have happened? Put on your winter boots because we’re about to embark on an adventure into the snowy world of the woolly rhino. The woolly rhino lived during the mid-Pline Epic (2 million years ago), alongside other animals such as the woolly mammoth SAA antelope and the bison. The woolly Rhino survived several ice ages, including the last Ice Age, and only died out around 14, 000 years ago. This means the woolly Rhino lived alongside humans for a long time, but we’ll get to that later. The average height of a woolly rhino is about 2 m, which is about the average height of an NBA basketball player. However, they ranged from 3 to 5 m, roughly the length of a large canoe. These were large, lumbering animals.

Imagine finding a woolly rhino lying in the middle of the road while you're running late for work or school. That would prolong your commute by hours. Well, good luck getting that out of the way. These rhinos were heavy-set, weighing up to 2700 kg, which is equivalent to modern-day white rhinoceroses. It would take dozens of extremely strong people to lift them off the road, and their two extremely long and sharp horns would unintentionally puncture many tires. As herbivores residing in the colder regions of Northern Asia and Europe, these two enormous horns assisted them in finding food. They scraped beneath the snow with their horns until they were able to reach the flora buried beneath.

Woolly rhinos were not violent animals; if they were still alive today, we might be able to use this skill to train them to clear snow off our driveways and sidewalks. Yes, I know what you're thinking—wouldn't these enormous animals be a threat to humans? Well, that's pretty unlikely—despite their size, woolly rhinos were not likely to attack each other, let alone another species. Instead, when faced with an opponent, they would likely scrape their horns against the ground in an attempt to intimidate them into backing off. So, unless you're afraid of loud noises, you should be safe.

Although it would have been more difficult for these enormous beasts to survive, some other mammals that survived the Ice Age, like the musk deer and the reindeer, were able to adapt to the warmer climate. Who knows, maybe if the woolly rhino had survived you'd be singing Rudolph the Red-nosed Rhino during the holidays. Earlier woolly rhinos lived up to and including the last ice age, existing during the same period as early humans. Climate change was not the only issue these fuzzy rhinos had to deal with when early people used them as food, kept warm with their fur, and made spears out of their horns.

Anthropologists suspect that the Woolly Rhino's extermination was ultimately brought about by overhunting; scientists have even discovered that our Neanderthal ancestors once feasted on Woolly Rhinos when they spotted mushrooms. Since there were a lot of rhinos in Siberia, perhaps they had a recipe for stroganoff made with woolly rhinos. However, because the meat was so dense, it would have been difficult to chew. If Woolly Rhino were served to us today, it would be best prepared like a steak. Just be sure to request thinly cut, or else the constant crunching might hurt your jaw.

Our ancestors used woolly rhinoceroses for other purposes, including covering and storing. They would keep them warm in the cold climate. If these hairy creatures were still alive, do you think we would still make coats out of their fur? Would you even be able to afford it? Most likely, the answer is yes. Nowadays, if you can find a fur coat, it's usually made from the fur of smaller animals like mink foxes or chinchillas because the woolly rhino is so large that there is an abundance of fur to spare.

It would be far cheaper to buy a woolly rhino coat than a mink coat, and the rhino would still have hair. After that, you could make some intricate wigs or give your living room couch some fuzzy pillows. Fur exports from countries like Mongolia and Russia would generate significantly more earnings than they do at the moment. Not a single woolly rhino coat is sold, although Mongolia, the world's largest fur exporter, makes 325 million dollars annually. Just think of all the extra money they could make if they had access to these massive fur-bearing creatures. Large fur farms would likely house the rhinos to maximize sustainability and productivity.

Nowadays, much like other rhino species worldwide, the Woolly Rhino may be targeted for its horns, but they would have supporters fighting for their preservation in their camp. You would also probably see anti-hunting organizations trying to save. If you reside in North America, it's time to celebrate since, in contrast to their Mammoth cousins, you can now live side by side with the Woolly Rhino. The Woolly Rhino was unable to cross the border from Russia to Alaska, therefore it never made it to North America. However, similar to polar bears living in zoos, there are now several ways to send them internationally.

The woolly rhino would reside in a specially designed artificial habitat, which would be cold. Warm temperatures and an abundance of vegetation surround the area; if you're lucky, you may even be allowed to feed the rhinos; just be cautious not to approach too closely to their horns. The woolly rhinoceros were amiable creatures that coexisted peacefully with humans; as a result of climate change, their fur may have decreased slightly, but it is still useful for fashionable winter clothing. They could move about with us or be housed in a zoo. Please don't mind if I borrow Rhino to assist shovel my walkway; the mushroom cheeseburgers and fries are quite delicious. If woolly rhinos were still in existence today, it would be a huge change, but you know what would be more significant? If woolly mammoths were still alive. However, that story is for another piece.