Sweet Revenge: Four Harmless Ways to Get Back at Your Ex This Valentine’s Day
From Adopting a Roach to Naming a Stink Bug, These Zoo-Inspired Ideas Are Perfectly Petty

Valentine’s Day is all about love, but let’s be honest—not everyone is feeling the romance. If you’re nursing a broken heart or still cringing at the thought of your ex, this February 14th might feel more like a day of dread than celebration. But what if you could turn those bitter feelings into something… well, a little fun?
Across the country, zoos have come up with hilariously harmless ways to help you channel your post-breakup energy. From naming a stink bug after your ex to adopting a cockroach in their honor, these creative ideas are the perfect way to get back at your former flame without crossing the line. So, if you’re ready to embrace your inner petty queen (or king), here are four zoo-inspired ways to make this Valentine’s Day unforgettable.
1. Name a Stink Bug After Your Ex
Let’s face it: some exes just stink. And what better way to commemorate their less-than-pleasant qualities than by naming a stink bug after them? Zoos like the Cincinnati Zoo & Botanical Garden offer programs where you can symbolically name a stink bug (or other critters) in honor of someone special—or not-so-special.
Not only is this a hilarious way to poke fun at your ex, but it’s also completely harmless. Plus, you’ll be supporting conservation efforts, so you can feel good about your petty revenge.

2. Adopt a Cockroach in Their Honor
If your ex was the kind of person who made your skin crawl, why not immortalize them as a cockroach? Many zoos, including the Bronx Zoo, offer “adopt-an-animal” programs where you can symbolically adopt a cockroach and even receive a certificate with your ex’s name on it.
It’s the perfect way to say, “You bugged me then, and you’re still bugging me now.” And let’s be real—what could be more satisfying than knowing your ex’s name is forever linked to one of the world’s most notorious pests?
3. Donate to a Vulture Fund
If your ex had a habit of picking apart everything you did, why not turn the tables by donating to a vulture fund? Zoos like the San Diego Zoo allow you to contribute to the care and conservation of vultures, birds known for their, ahem, unique dining habits.
It’s a clever way to remind your ex that they’re no longer part of your life—and that you’re thriving without them. Plus, you’ll be helping protect these misunderstood creatures, which is a win-win.
4. Sponsor a Poo-Throwing Animal
For the ultimate in lighthearted revenge, consider sponsoring an animal known for its, shall we say, unique habits. Many zoos offer programs where you can support animals like chimpanzees or lemurs, both of which are famous for their playful (and slightly gross) behavior.
Imagine the satisfaction of knowing your ex’s name is associated with an animal that loves to fling poo. It’s the kind of harmless jab that will make you smile every time you think about it.
Why These Ideas Work
Revenge might sound tempting, but let’s be real—holding onto anger and resentment only hurts you in the long run. These zoo-inspired ideas, on the other hand, allow you to channel your feelings into something positive and productive.
Not only do these programs support important conservation efforts, but they also give you a chance to laugh at your situation. And let’s face it: laughter is the best medicine, especially when it comes to healing a broken heart.

Turning Pain into Power
Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about wallowing in heartbreak. Instead, it can be an opportunity to reclaim your power and celebrate your independence. Whether you’re naming a stink bug, adopting a cockroach, or sponsoring a poo-flinging primate, these activities remind you that you’re in control of your own happiness.
So, this February 14th, don’t let your ex live rent-free in your head. Instead, take a page from the zoo’s playbook and turn your pain into something playful, creative, and downright hilarious. After all, the best revenge is living well—and maybe having a stink bug named after your ex.
- It's wonderful to share this journey with you. Thank you for reading. If this piece touched you, please let me know in the comments. Subscribing means you'll be part of future explorations together.
About the Creator
mureed hussain
Hi, I’m a creative writer passionate about health & wellness, love, longevity, aging, and pet care. With extensive Quora experience, I craft engaging posts, thoughtful questions, and insightful answers.
Find me at>>[email protected]




Comments
There are no comments for this story
Be the first to respond and start the conversation.