Not my wake

A lone Kookaburra’s raucous laugh splits the silent dawn. Soon, it’s solo performance swells to a trio, then a quartet. Birdsong rings from all sides of the stand of eucalyptus trees. Nature’s alarm clock at its best! Blinking away the last vestiges of sleep, I readily relinquish my grip on my weirdly recurring dream. Everyone had been panicking over an asteroid heading straight for earth. How bizarre! Such a random disaster to conjure up in my dreams nightmares.

With perfect timing my favourite night Nurse Sarah chirps, “Jenny, time for your medication.” Automatically, I compliantly swallow the tablets they promise will usher in a ‘New, Stabilised Me’! It is just another day at Brentley Psychiatric Unit, my temporary home. Or is it?

The past few days, nurses and ‘Wardies’ had been rushed, nervous, careless… glued to the endlessly murmuring TV, just outside our locked ward. Previously efficient workers were distracted, newly obsessed with their phones (supposedly banned while on the work clock). I catch snatches of their whispered conversations… “asteroid… certain destruction…”

Unconcerned, I restlessly pace round and round; prowl up and down the corridors like a caged tiger. Stealthily, I await my chance. Finally, I slip undetected out the door as it slowly eases shut behind a preoccupied nurse. Snagging a cap and coat from a nearby chair, I casually saunter out of the building.

Ah, free! Free as this mornings’ zany Kookaburras. Quick! Before they catch me… head for the bushland! What a treat! A brisk walk in the fresh country air is far more pleasant than my past few weeks cooped up in beige coloured rooms, breathing stale air. Oh look, I do love butterflies! Especially my favourite electric blue and black Ulysses butterfly which is just fluttering past. How beautiful!

Seconds or minutes or maybe hours later, a chilly wind nips at my fingertips. Hunger pangs send my muddy slippers back towards the stately red brick building I’d called ‘home’ lately. Lunch is due to be served.

Drawing closer, leaving the protection of the forest, a puzzling sight greets me. The typically deserted car park rivals Queen Street at Christmas! People scurry about like ants, car doors pop open and snap shut. What fun! Not wanting to miss anything, I hot-foot it down to join the melee. Fragmented conversations ricochet round me.

“Asteroid… tomorrow… total destruction…”

Weird! Who cares what happens to some distant planet or star or moon in outer space? Not me! Not before lunch! ! My transformation into ‘The Invisible Woman” is amazing. Not a single soul notices me. I sidle off to the nearby formal garden and sink down low onto a bench. What a captivating pattern in the wrought iron framework. My fingers gently trace its intricate design. Some time later, I rouse myself from my reverie to discover the garden and grounds are now silent and still. The car park has been swept clean of the earlier chaos, clutter and chatter.

Well then, time for me to sneak back into the ward for lunch. Clearly, the earlier ‘circus’ is over. The deserted entrance poses no difficulty. I wander unchallenged, undetected back to my room. What? Where’s my lunch? Hungry, I set off in search of it. The hallway resounds with my footsteps… mine alone. Oops! Don’t tell me I missed an ‘Evacuation Drill!’ Or have I forgotten about a picnic ? No, that was definitely no picnic outside earlier.

As I pass by the staff TV quietly burbling on, an earnest newsreader snags my attention:

“With less than 20 hours left before the Asteroid is predicted to hit earth, panic stricken people flee their homes in a futile search for safety. Traffic jams, riots and fires have broken out in downtown streets. People are advised to stay calm...”

Hmmm… so that’s what it is all about! How many times have we heard warnings just like this one? It has never happened before. It‘s not going to happen tomorrow.

My feet skip lightly over the polished tiles lining the corridor. A few corners later, the smell of corned beef and burnt cabbage assaults me. Yuck! A gentle push swings the door open. In I go. Forget the burnt cabbage… apple crumble and custard appeal far more to my tastebuds. Yep! Ice cream and cream top it off. Greedily scooping the delicious treat into my watering mouth, I weave between the benches and fridges. Look at all this food! They never dish up stuff like this for us! I wonder when they’ll be back… probably Wednesday, after the asteroid has sneakily taken a detour to destroy someone else’s planet.

I leave a trail of dirty dishes in my wake… no, I’m not having a wake! I’m not going to die! At least not tomorrow. Besides, as wonderful as I am, who’d come to my wake? They mightn’t even be back by then!

“The countdown has now fallen to 18 hours until the Asteroid cataclysmically collides with earth… people are urged to remain calm…”

Disregarding the irritating droning, I continue onwards. Feeling as bouncy as a kangaroo, I hop along to the Matron’s room. Curiosity wins out. I can’t don’t resist having a sticky beak. She’s about my size. I’m curious about her taste in clothes. Hmm… a silky red blouse, full black skirt and stilettos. They’re a pretty good fit and contrast nicely with my auburn curls… everyone loves them. Spinning excitedly in a pirouette, I pause to catch my breath. Another thought strikes me… I’m pretty ‘mean’ on the dancefloor. Scrabbling through Matron’s wardrobe, a pile of compact discs spill onto the drab carpet. What a surprise! Who’d have thought? “Flashdance!” “Maniac” is one of my all time favourite songs… for obvious reasons!

My little ‘tour’ of the facility circles back past the pesky TV and its reporter. Dark shadows now bruise his eyes. He sure has aged heaps since I’d last watched him a few hours ago… his previous handsome good looks are now positively haggard! I feel a bit weary myself… it’s been quite a day. The pressing need for a quick nap ambushes me. Sleep swiftly claims me.

Forty winks becomes four hours. My stomach rumbles, drawing me back to the bountifully stocked cold room. Perching on the front stairs — surveying my feast of chicken, salad, bread rolls and accompanying pavlova — I’m certain it’s a picnic fit for a princess… Princess Jenny! It’s got quite a ring to it.

Much too early, the sun departs. A blood moon and stars play tiggie. Their night sky begs for an audience, a dancer. Soon the Common Room’s compact disc player pumps lively strains of music through a doorway, spilling out onto the patio. Twirling, whirling — almost tripping — my fantastic night spins on and on.

I wish upon a star that it will never end… is an Asteroid a star? How silly. Of course it isn’t going to hit! Tonight’s much too perfect, such fun. Tomorrow… will surely arrive, just as it always has, always does, always will! And the kookaburra clan will be there warmly welcoming it in with their lively laughter.

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Written for the Daily Prompt Challenge: “Scientists predict a massive asteroid is about to hit Earth in 24 hours. Write a story about a character who isn’t worried.”