PACO Calling TACO - 4

This conversation happened on Sunday, September 28, after Putin was briefed on the UN General Assembly sessions and Trump's post on Truth Social about "discussions with the Middle Eastern Community concerning Gaza."

"Hey, Trump, stop it!" [menacingly]

"Whoa, Put'n, what are we, on last names only now? Why so mad?"

"I want you to stop playing for Ukraine and pretending to be the world's peace maker. You are not getting the Nobel!"

"Wow, where does this come from?"

"I didn't want to bring it up and was waiting for you to call me about it but you never did. So I'm calling now to tell you how mad you made me when you said Russia is a 'paper tiger' and that Ukraine can win the war, get its territories back and even some more. A 'paper tiger'!?? Do you really want me to show you my paper claws and teeth, Donnie?" [more menacingly]

"Whoa, whoa, stop your horses, Vlad, slow down! Who do you think you are talking to? Slow down, alright? Last I checked I'm still the president of the United States, the most powerful country in the world!" [angry]

"And do you remember who put you in that position, Donnie? Should I remind you why you are going after Comey?" [angry, talking through his teeth]

"No need, Vlad, I remember [softer]. As for the paper tiger post, I only did that because I had talked with Zelenskyy and he begged me to help. Begged like a baby. You've been ignoring my calls and missing the deadlines to set the bilat with him, so I had to do something. Something to attract your attention."

"Oh, really?" [softer, sarcastically]

"Yes, really. What did you expect me to do, as nothing was done by your side after we met in August?"

"Well, you've got my attention now! But yours seems to be elsewhere!"

"What do you mean?"

"I see you are posting like crazy about some phantom talks about Gaza while the UN General Assembly is still in session and its plenary session on Gaza completely failed. Are you trying to compete with the UN for the Nobel Peace Prize, Donnie?"

"I didn't know the UN was competing for the prize" [mumbles unhappily]. "Do they really?"

"Oh for f*ck sake, Donnie, your obsession with the Nobel is intolerable."

"Careful, Vlad. I have solved seven wars already. Seven and counting! Had you not been so stubborn, it would've been eight. You are letting me down, Vlad!"

"What if I don't want you to solve my war, Donnie?"

"That's what I figured. And that's why I switched my attention to Gaza. It seems like we'll be able to solve it with a very special deal. Very special, Vlad, the likes of which no one has ever seen before" [boastful].

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't need to hang your noodles on my ears, Donnie."

"To hand your what?"

"It's a Russian expression, to hang your noodles on my ears. Means to pull my leg, I think, in English. Basically, I can see through your bullsh*t!"

"This is not bullsh*t, Vlad, we are really close to solving Gaza! Really close, if Bibi comes through."

"Good luck with that, Donnie!" [sarcastically].

"Why so sarcastic, Vlad? Do you know something I don't? Did you talk with Bibi recently?"

"I haven't talked to that old hag for years, Donnie. But I don't need to talk to him to know why he doesn't want to stop the war in Gaza."

"Oh really? Why, Vlad? Please tell me."

"For the same reason you don't want to release the Epstein files and I don't want to end the war in Ukraine. The moment he stops the war in Gaza, he'll be eaten alive by his own people. He'll rot in jail if that happens."

"I think you are wrong in this case. Completely wrong, because Bibi is willing to make a deal."

"He is just telling you so, because he needs your weapons and doesn't want you to turn your back on him just like you did on me."

"I didn't turn my back on you, Vlad. It's you who turned his back on me. You are letting me down, Vlad. And I thought we had a good personal relationship. Are we still friends, Vlad, do we still have a good personal relationship?"

"Here we go again, Donnie, in a closed loop, you are intolerable! Eff you, Trump!" [hangs up angrily]

Trump, looking at the phone, "What did I say?.."