January 21, 2021

Dear Diary,

What a day yesterday. That inauguration was nice and calm. Thank goodness there wasn’t a riot or anyone getting bold. Not too sure what to think about this whole election. Its like, can America get any worse? It probably can but let’s pray for the best. How nice to have a black woman in office, a woman at all in that position is beautiful, but for it to be a black woman is even better. I sure hope they know what they are doing. I think things may get better for America. We are always looked at as the laughingstock of the world and the last 4 years we really were the laughingstock of the world. The headlines across the world about Trump leaving office have been absolutely hilarious. You got a woman online talking about how this is “Our Country” LOL. Ma’am, this is NOT ya’ll country!!! This is stolen land, and this is why America is the way it is now. BECAUSE ITS WAS BUILT ON MURDER, THEFT and SLAVERY. Nothing good can come from that. This is why America will forever be fighting itself. But we all know America will be America. I will always do what I need to do to prosper and be what God needs and wants me to be no matter who is in office.

Apart from that, I think we just took this relationship to the next level. I know I know what about the other stuff you said right? Right, I know what I said. We’ll see how it goes. I mean he’s paying bills some kind of way. We are both broke and we both have a vision we are working towards. I mean I can’t say that I can look for a man that has more than me, I can only look for a man that has the same thing as me. We are on the same wavelength and he doesn’t ask me for ANYTHING!! He always seems to find a way to get it himself and I’m not going to question where he’s getting it from either. I did give in and hit him up on his stream last night before I went to bed. He did hit me right back and asked why I was going to bed so early. I really was tired last night. He did call me this morning and OMG he was soo sweet with it. He was all you’re an inspiration to me and I really want to do this with you and grow together and I could have cried this morning. In the whole 20 yrs I knew J, not one time did he care about what my goals where or what kind of vision I had or anything. He never asked or wanted to know. He only wanted to know when he could fuck and that’s the only thing his ass was worried about. But O, he’s soo sweet and kind and cuddly and asks when he can see me again. I don’t ever remember having such masculine, I’m going to be the man you need me to be and I’m going to take care of you energy around me. It feels good and I’m not sure if I want to give it up right now or stick around to see what happens. I mean if we both have the same vision then I’m thinking we can definitely collaborate and come up together. We both want a drop shipping store, we both want to invest in having our own childcare center and we both are open to having a child at our age. Who knows what will happen now? I’m just going to focus on losing this weight and getting everything in order so that I can one day bring another little in this world. I would love that. Maybe one day down the road. Not too far down the road because ya girl is getting older LOL. If I don’t, Maybe I’ll just have a little boy to take care of and I get to skip potty training and all the other stuff. Even though I kind of want to do that part (insert sad face here). But yeah, We’ll see!! I have to get lunch made for these kids so, Imma Holla Atcha!!!