Single Nanny Diary
Bio
I’m 36 single never married no kids and a what..... A NANNY!! I date but it’s some creepers out there. Just stick around and let me tell you what’s happenin!! This is not to be read grammatically correct by any means. IT'S A DIARY!!! Tips!
Stories (9)
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February 8, 2021
Dear Diary, Good Lord Almighty!! Bestie really showed his ass this weekend!! As long as we have been “talking” and this stupid fuck can’t answer a simple, do you want to be in a relationship with me question. After 20 years he’s telling me that he can’t answer that question. I mean he literally changed the whole damn topic on purpose. I asked him if he liked me to where he would be in a relationship with me and his manipulative narcissistic ass goes it’s a nice day outside hu? I was like what the fuck? He really wouldn’t answer the damn question. I have been asking him that question for the past 5 years and he does the same dumb ass shit every time I ask him. Like why is it soo hard for him to answer that question? It’s a simple yes or no!! Then he always wants to try and come back at me with some other shit about him giving me money. It should be clear to him that after 20 years, his money is not what I’m looking for. I don’t even ask his dumbass for money like that. He said it like he just hands it over to me. I could ask him for $20 and I wouldn’t hear from him for a week. Then what is he asking me for, SOME FUCKING ASS!!!! Like Tyrone… IF YOU DON’T GET YO ASS OUTTA HERE LOL!!! I loved Bestie with all my heart, and I tried but he doesn’t want a relationship with me. At least not the type of relationship I’m looking for. His ass wants me to sit around and only have sex with him but I can’t get any intimacy, care, love or any type of emotional support or cuddling. I doubt he’s even really attracted to me like that. I’m sorry but I’m not gonna be his hoe for the rest of my life. I don’t want to be his fuck buddy for the rest of my life either. I wasted 20 years waiting for a man that never cared for me, was attracted to me or loved me in any type of way. If his dumbass did, HE NEVER EXPRESSED IT TO ME. The only thing he has told me is I care about you and that’s only when he sees I’m hurt or crying. THEN, while I’m crying he says ok soo are you ready now? This dick really asked me if I was ready to have sex while I’m emotionally torn apart. That has got to mean he really doesn’t care about me any type of way. He just wants to have sex with me and that’s all. Like what type of bitch raised this piece of shit? Why did my stupid ass stick around the bullshit for soo long on a wish? I may never hear from him again because I told him I don’t want to have sex with him anymore because I want to be in a committed relationship. I would like to be married and I would like to have children of my own, He doesn’t want kids and clearly, he doesn’t want to be with me. I just ended it. I don’t want any closure because he’s given me all the answers I want and need. You see, It took me a long time to realize that I never ask him for money and he never really gives it to me either so I really aint missing anything but a person to fuck and talk shit with. I can get the same thing but with some truth and caring. Men need to stop opening a woman’s heart without the intent of taking care of the content inside. For years bestie has known the way I feel about him and now I see that he has just been using that to get what he wants. I won’t be that stupid anymore that’s for sure. I’m gonna miss the hell outta him because he was my friend. But there’s no better feeling than the feeling of a person wanting you to be around romantically, spiritually and professionally. It’s about building a life with someone and growing with that person. Helping each other reach goals and prosper not only individually but together as a whole. Bestie doesn’t want that with me and that’s what I want to accomplish with a man. Hopefully, I can have someone who cares, loves and adores me. Someone who thinks I’m pretty and wants to be around me. Someone who wants to travel and go places with me. You know, a man who wants to be married as well. I hope he’s out there. Anyway…. Imma Holla Atcha!!!
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
February 4, 2021
Dear Diary, It’s been a pretty cool week. I have just one question! How do you date a guy with multiple “homegirls”? Yep, I’m the girlfriend that is a bit jealous and it does kind of bother me a bit. So, O is pretty cool, and he doesn’t seem like he’s hiding anything. He’s told me about all the friends he has. He says he has told them about me. I’ve met his sister and she seem cool. It does seem a bit different because he always answers the phone. He’s soo sweet to me and this is really cool. Its not like I can do anything about them because they were there first. I think it’s a bit disrespectful and controlling to tell him that he can’t talk to them anymore because I feel uncomfortable about it. Like where is the trust right? Half of my brain is trusting, and half is like boys cheat and deal with it. I shouldn’t think that boys cheat, but he doesn’t really seem like a boy but a man. I guess that could be the difference as well. I’ve always seen boys cut up like that but the men I have known actually take care of their women and are loyal. I don’t think I have much to worry about with him. If it comes in my face, then I’ll say something about it but until then I’m going to leave it alone.
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
February 2, 2021
Dear Diary, My weekend was actually laid back for a change. No funny business at all. I spent it with O and I really like being with him. I feel soo comfortable when im there with him. I have fun, get attention, kisses and cuddles and it doesn’t really feel forced. He is doing better with his stress I believe. He doesn’t seem so tense and aggravated too much anymore. I think the financial burden isn’t so heavy anymore and I’m soo happy about that. I hate to see a black man doing his best and can’t get ahead and I’m soo happy that he is able to start again. I’m going to do my absolute best to make sure that I’m his peace and NOT his problem. That’s all I want to do. LOL!! This weekend I was rubbing his back while he was looking up whatever gaming stuff he was looking up and he was talking all sweet to me. While I was rubbing/scratching his back I said “All I want to do is make you feel good baby!” He started to giggle and said he got chills. Mission accomplished!! When I’m with a man and I really like him, I’m definitely trying to be his peace. I don’t really bug him about anything, I don’t ask him for anything unless he offers me something. He’s a gamer and this is totally new to me, so I try not to bother him too much because it’s something that he wants to do and he’s good at it. While he works on his business I’m usually working on mine. The only thing I wish he would stop doing is telling me he’s going to do something for me and then not do it. He does it without blinking an eye. I guess I’ll just let him know that it bothers me when he does that. Can’t be too hard to do right? I mean he did stop streaming all damn night. It’s like once his finances got in order then his mood got lighter and then his focus got better. I have to say, Finances not being in order seems to put a lot of stress on a black man. It doesn’t look like it’s any better when he’s a single father. We’re rooting for you guys!! Oh, and then he slipped up last weekend too and referred to me as mommy to his son. He comes in the room and goes “my bad baby”. It was cute and I assured him that it didn’t bother me. To some women it might bother them but to me, a 36 yr old single nanny with no kids and dating a single father, It ABSOLUTLEY didn’t bother me. I figured if he felt comfortable enough to say something like that out loud then he must like me and like me around them. I know his son doesn’t want me to leave sometimes but that’s normal.
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
January 28, 2021
Dear Diary, Soo I totally spent the whole night with bestie!! I know im stupid as fuck. I probably shouldn’t have been over there like that, but he is definitely my best friend. Our relationship is like that slim thug song Special on his Suga Daddy Slim album. We rarely argue and when we do, we are back at it. It’s been a while since we did the month long I’m mad at you thing. We can sit and laugh and talk all night and that is exactly what we did. I went to “The Spot” and chilled all night with bestie. We drank, got tipsy, watched crazy Kevin Samuels (We both love that guy) and talked about our qualities. He was soo sweet to me and he’s never given me soo many compliments. So, I haven’t given a full run down on who Bestie really is. Bestie and I met on the old-school call-in chat line when we were about 19 or 20. It first started as booty buddies. We were still out there having our fun clubbing and cutting up. He would sneak in my window at night and we would chill and ya know…… FUCK!! I would say after a year or so I told him that I loved him and cared for him. You know what that dickhead told me? I don’t want to do that right now with you. So, me being the G my momma raised me to be went on about my business and did my own thing. I got into different relationships, but he would always call to check in on me. Or when the relationship was ending, here pops up Bestie. Time went on and well I started to want a real relationship and marriage. I kept telling him that and he would just laugh it off because he’s used to me being well, THAT BITCH!! Little did he know, I was calming down. I wasn’t in the streets and partying anymore. He would call me on a Friday or Saturday night, and I would be in my PJs watching TV. He would start to facetime me and started to see I might be kind of serious. That’s when He started to pass out the cash and really if I wanted or needed anything then he would give it to me. I didn’t ask him for anything. He was definitely my last resort for money. I really think he started to like me to a point where he wanted to make sure I was ok. At this point, I didn’t think he really cared for me and he was giving me money to keep the pussy around (He loves my head, and this pussy is undefeated right now LAMO). I started to tell him that money can’t keep me around because I wanted to be in a real relationship. He then gave me rules!! I could have a friend I could go out with, but I couldn’t get emotionally attached to any man out here. I was like ummm BOY PLEASE!! Still, he didn’t express to me that he wanted to be in a serious relationship with me. He gave me a door and I opened that bitch. I would tell him about dates I was going on and he would get soo upset that he would tell me to shut the fuck up or hang up in my face. But he wouldn’t express how he felt about me. I just counted it as he was mad, he couldn’t get any pussy that night. At this point I was soo confused. He called me one time while I was on a date and I told him that I would be home soon. You know that boy came over and was all in my shit about going out with a guy? I was like well you told me I could hang out with men. NOPE!! He recanted that real quick. Now, it was I CAN’T BE OUT ENTERTAING ANY MEN AT ALL!!!! I was soo confused at this point because still, he has no clue what he wants to do with a woman he’s known his whole adult life, that he fucks on a regular and takes care of. I felt like a sugar baby and I kept telling him I want a real relationship. By this time, we were both single. I broke up with my drug addict ass boyfriend and well about a year later he caught his common law wife at the hotel with another man. Aint that some shit!!! 5 years later to now…. He says I love you and he don’t want anybody else to have me. I don’t know if that’s his way of trying to start something without saying it, but it sounds like it. We were going to get something eat one night and I told him I was going to go find me a husband and have some kids and he could have banged my head against the damn window. He gets soo mad when I say that type of shit. You should see it. I just be laughin. I know it’s weird, but I love when he gets physical because it’s a soft physical with a little of that gangsta roughness. It makes my panties wet every single time. Now I’m stuck again. I still have O around and he’s really cool. I might go and chill with him tonight. He doesn’t really seem like he wants to have sex with me sometimes, but I don’t know. I think because his son is there, and he’s stressed out he doesn’t really want to be with me like that or he doesn’t really have the urge to. I can’t say. I can walk in the damn room and Bestie’s dick gets hard. It’s fun with him. He knows just how to hit it. Last night though wasn’t a fuck, he was trying to make love to me. No, HE DID MAKE LOVE TO ME. He took his time and I love when he moans. He sounds soo fucking sexy it makes me extra wet. Anyway, OFF TOPIC… kinda LOL. O is good too but me and Bestie got 20yrs of chemistry and that’s kinda hard to just throw away. Must be hard for him to just get rid of me too because he hit me up first. I don’t know Diary, Im fucking confused again. Imma Holla Atcha.
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
January 26,2021
Dear Diary, Let’s just say it was an interesting weekend and not to mention the start of the week was extra weird. Me and bestie (Jaylan) haven’t talked in almost a month because he’s a total dick. I have to say, I was thinking about him a lot on Sunday. I keep telling myself that he does not like me like that so I should just go on with my business. It’s soo weird. He’s always the hell around!! Its like we are joined at the hip, brain or heart. We are connected somehow. Sunday I was at home, just thinking about him and all the 20yrs we were “friends”. I was thinking about him real hard and something was like, something isn’t right with him, his mom or his daughter. I PROMISE, not even 2 hours later, BOOM, he calls me. Apologizing for being such a dick and for treating me the way he does and all this other stuff. Of course, he asked to see me so you know I said yeah. He comes over and we have this discussion about why he treated me like trash and he’s like he doesn’t know why he would treat someone who has been around soo long the way he does. He couldn’t do anything but look in my face and kiss the hell outta me. Then bestie says I don’t know what I be thinking cuz I don’t want anybody else to have you! Like what the hell!! NIGGA, IF YOU LIKE IT THEN YOU BETTA PUT A RING ON IT!! That’s all I’m sayin!! But here’s the weird part. After all the mushy stuff, he goes, Kayla is going to the Navy!! EXCUSE ME WHAT THE FUCK!! He looked soo worried and hurt but at the same time realizing that his daughter is no longer a baby but a growing woman that has realized that she must do something better with her life. I was just looking again like damn how does that even work? I just had this thought in my head about something not right with them. Bestie sees the look on my face and he’s like, did you have a feeling before I called you? I told him yeah like something wasn’t quite right with yall. He was like you always get those feelings with me when something big is about to happen around me. Look, I don’t know what it is with Bestie but somehow, we are deeply connected to each other. I don’t know if you call it a soul mate or a soul tie, but we feel each other and we know each other to a T!! We argue but we always go back to each other. I don’t know what’s up with us. I don’t know if he was serious this time or he just wanted some damn pussy? All I’m trying to know is if a man is consistently coming back to you then is it love and caring or is it because he knows you care and love him. I mean it’s been 20yrs for crying out loud!! There has got to be some kind of love there. No matter who I date, when it’s starting to come to an end….. Here comes bestie with his I miss you ass. It never fails, HE IS ALWAYS AROUND!! I just want to be married and be able to be with a man for the rest of my life. I haven’t had that and I’m starting to think that he is terrified of doing that. He did say he was scared of me like that because if anything happened then he might end up in jail. I don’t know what to think about that? This situationship is CRAZY!!! We’ve been at this for 2 decades and right now… I’m just going to continue to chill with O which seems wrong but I don’t know what Bestie wants. HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT HE WANTS, but he does know he doesn’t want anyone else to have me!! Yall men are a trip!! O on the other hand is far too damn stressed for me. He always yelling at his son and I have no clue why. That boy be up till 10 or 11 at night when I’m not there. When I’m there during the week, his butt is sleep by 9:30pm, WITHOUT SCREAMING AT HIM!! He got a whoopin because he wouldn’t eat his breakfast and he sat there for 2hrs. I didn’t make him sit there for 2 hours, I figured he would tell me when he was done. I also think he sat there and played with that food because he thought somebody would give in and feed him the bullshit he is used to eating. Nope he got his ass beat!! I believe O is extra stressed out right now and he’s definitely taking it out on his son which is not cool at all. His son could be in the room watching tv and singing the song or laughing and here his stressed out ass goes telling him to be quiet. I don’t think he really deals with that boy at all. I think when he gets home from school, He goes and watches tv until its time for a bath and dinner. Other than that, I really do believe there is no interaction with him. When I’m there on the weekends he’s on the computer and he doesn’t play with him, take him to the park that’s right around the corner or even just sit and watch a movie wit him. It’s really hard to watch and be around sometimes because I feel bad for the son and then I feel like he doesn’t really like me like that. Now here I am, caught between familiarity and stress working on a plan. With Bestie, I don’t have to pay for anything if I really don’t want to pay for anything (but I don’t take advantage of that, he is my last resource). With O, he’s stressed, unemployed but thank God he’s thinking about going back to work…. MAYBE. He was talking about looking at some childcare centers and I will definitely help him look for a childcare center if he needs the help. It’s definitely been an awkward weekend and start to this week. All I can do is ask God to guide me and listen. We’ll see how this plays out. Imma Holla Atcha!!
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
January 21, 2021
Dear Diary, What a day yesterday. That inauguration was nice and calm. Thank goodness there wasn’t a riot or anyone getting bold. Not too sure what to think about this whole election. Its like, can America get any worse? It probably can but let’s pray for the best. How nice to have a black woman in office, a woman at all in that position is beautiful, but for it to be a black woman is even better. I sure hope they know what they are doing. I think things may get better for America. We are always looked at as the laughingstock of the world and the last 4 years we really were the laughingstock of the world. The headlines across the world about Trump leaving office have been absolutely hilarious. You got a woman online talking about how this is “Our Country” LOL. Ma’am, this is NOT ya’ll country!!! This is stolen land, and this is why America is the way it is now. BECAUSE ITS WAS BUILT ON MURDER, THEFT and SLAVERY. Nothing good can come from that. This is why America will forever be fighting itself. But we all know America will be America. I will always do what I need to do to prosper and be what God needs and wants me to be no matter who is in office.
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in The Swamp
January 19, 2021
Dear Diary, I’m a bit confused on this whole dating a single father thing. Like how do married people even get booty? Its soo difficult. I’m guessing they can only get it when the kids go to sleep because I don’t see any other way to do the nasty with a kid wide awake. Whatever, I don’t really think it will last though. This is what’s happening now. So before when we first started talking there was a good morning text and a good night text. Now I won’t hear from him at all in the morning or in the evening. I guess he lost interest or maybe he’s just stressed out. I’m not too sure which it could be. I know he keeps saying he’s broke and that he isn’t receiving his unemployment. He has expressed his frustration with his finances and how he’s behind on everything. He does Favors but won’t get his ass up and do any of them to make the money. He’s mostly banking on things that need funding to start but won’t use the Favors to start it. He’s also gambling with the government income. He is always talking about the government money this and the government money that. Like find a job so you can pay the bills. Do Favors while your kid is at school. Get a work from home call center job or something so you can take care of him. He said that the company he used to work for making $1200 a week called him back to work. Guess what the fuck he did… TURNED IT DOWN!!! Like what the ENTIRE FUCK is that!? He said he isn’t comfortable putting his son in childcare which I get due to the pandemic thing going on. But you will need to do something to make money. I guess I was wrong about that ambition of his. I’m really concerned because I think the gaming is really an escape from the reality he’s living in. That’s what it seems like anyway. I can’t say what he does when I’m not there but when I’m there he doesn’t spend any time with his son. It’s just YouTube that takes care of his son. He watches YouTube too and its hella annoying. I’m like why don’t you have game night with us or a movie night with us. He says ok and then when I get there what does he do…. WATCH FUCKING YOUTUBE or hop on the game and tells his son to go watch TV!! Like bro… There is more to watch than YouTube. Not to mention the fact he feeds his son extra trash. I mean like when I’m there all he gives him is gummies, chips, candy and cereal. The boy won’t eat one fruit or veggie. He might eat some chicken nuggets. No Cap, this past weekend I was there he fed him two bags of Cheetos at 8am, then an hour later fed him gummies. I slept during lunch because my period came but when I woke up and called him, he said he bought him doughnuts for lunch. I left around 2 or 3 because I had some stuff to do. Came back at night and the boy had skittles. He aint little either. Then he got the nerve to scream at the child when he asks for the shit. I’m like, quit screaming at him because you are the one that has him addicted to this bullshit. Sugar is drug and he’s definitely addicted to it. Aint no point in screaming at him if you are going to allow him to eat it every damn day All day long. Monkey see monkey do with kids. If he saw you eating something different then he will. If those choices aren’t available to him then he will find something else to eat. He says he feels guilty because his mother isn’t around. That’s not your fault unless you killed her. I mean I’m not small but damn, I don’t eat bullshit all day every damn day. When I’m there and his dad is sleep I at least try to feed him some type of fruit in the morning and the kid wont even take that. Ill give him cereal in the morning but only a kid bowl. You know what the kid tells me? No a big bowl!! THE DEVIL IS A LIE!!! I don’t feed any child a grown-up size meal unless it’s a teenager and I limit that shit. Good Lord Almighty Diary. I don’t know anymore. So, this is what I’m going to do. He doesn’t want to call me anymore, fine, I won’t keep making the effort and we’ll see when he calls me and if at all he’ll call my ass. Not trying to play games but I’m not going to put energy and effort into a another relationship and I’m not getting the same thing in return. If he’s too stressed to balance his life as a single father and a girlfriend then he needs to drop the girlfriend and worry about himself and his child. I would be happier if he would let me know that. Anyway, Imma holla atcha!
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
January 12, 2021
Dear Diary, I had a pretty good weekend. No complaints here. Got to spend time with my significant other boo thang honey baby whatever you wanna call him. Like what do you even call that person anymore. I’m not even sure what to call him or what we are right now. He said he doesn’t want to put a title on it because then that’s when problems start. I HATE THAT and it sounds like he just doesn’t want to be in a committed relationship, but then again, I could be totally wrong about that. He did say that he was happy with the direction we are going and that makes me feel like he is interested in me. OMG it was soo annoying, sweet and funny what happened Sunday morning. So, his son throws the pillow on my head at 6 IN THE FUCKING MORNING trying to get into his bed. I throw the pillow back on his son’s bed and he goes wailing like someone just tried to kill him LMAO!! The dad screams, WHAT ARE YOU CRYING FOR? I tell him what happens and he’s all, NO GET IN YOUR OWN BED!! He does but after about 5 minutes here he goes all up under me trying to move me. HELL TAKE THE FUCKING BED LOL!!! I took my ass in the living room and take the sheet with me because it was a bit chilly. O is finally like, what’s wrong babe why you getting out the bed? So, I had to tell him like I’m not going to fight your son about the bed. He was kinda upset and he just came in the living room with me, but he was more concerned about my mental part on his son. His son is a bit rambunctious if you will, but a sweet boy all the same. He does have some issues and O told me about those issues before we dove into this relationship or whatever this is right now. He was soo apologetic and it seemed like he didn’t want to end this over his son and his behavior issues. Actually, he said that. He asked me like 10 times if we were still good. And 10 times I told him we were good. It’s going to take more than a 7 yr old taking over the bed for me to just wanna leave. I believe he did tell me some of the other women he has messed with left because his son may be too much to handle. I’m a nanny and I’ve been in childcare for almost 20yrs. I’ve seen and dealt with all kinds of behavioral problems and looked up different ways to deal with them. I also just think he’s spoiled LMAO.
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Humans
January 7, 2021
Dear Diary, Here we are.... 2021. Everybody is probably starting a challenge of some sort and I'm just hoping this is NOT how my year will be. Damn car wont start!!! Anyway.... not too bad of a situation. That's really all that brought my holidays down. Other than that it was ok. As for my love life..... lets just say... I think this time I'm free!! Me and Jaylan been at this for a decade and some change. TOO FUCKIN LONG!!! He forever single but I can't talk to anyone else. Like how the hell does that work? IT DONT!!! I wasted far too much time and even more time on emotions with that lil boy!! LOL!! I'm soo done now!!! I been tryin to get away from him for years and now I think this time.... Imma bounce!! I always loved that boy. Forever loved that boy and I didn't get that in return, so now I'm too old and too annoyed to be dealin with that. I think his bitch ass messed with my car really but that's a different story (rolls eyes). His ass always said he would do some ol petty ass shit like that LMAO! I'm soo annoyed you have no idea! But whatever. I wish him all the best LOVE YA LMAO!! It was real suga!! Much love!! I just know I can get back to ME!! Who I am and what I'm supposed to be doing in life. What makes me happy? What have I always wanted to try? I always looked better anyway LMAO!!! I need to do my hair, but I really don't want to. Anyway yeah.... fuck all them challenges bro. I'm just gonna love myself this year and still date because it’s fun but I’ll be damned if I hold my breath on any man.
By Single Nanny Diary5 years ago in Filthy
