Coming Up on One Year of COVID-19: Tips from a Crisis Counselor

Alright, alright, alright - I know what you’re all thinking. “It feels like last March never ended, and now here we are again, still in the middle of this godforsaken pandemic, penniless, exhausted, and trapped in our homes, and you have the audacity to publish another empty-worded self-help article tellings us to get our lives together?!”

Look, if you’re anything like me, you’ve been foaming at the mouth at the commercialization of mindfulness during this period of collective trauma. I get it. It’s no use acting like yoga pant sales and discounts on meditation apps will help solve issues of perpetual poverty and systemic racism. We’ve had enough.

But we are absolutely not to believe that our situation is hopeless. As a crisis counselor, I speak to people every week who are on the verge of giving up, about to end their own lives even, because they simply see no way forward. And I’ve been there; I know what it’s like to look up at the future and see no point.

But I also know that if we can just make it one more day together, perhaps we’ll make it a hundred more. That’s why I want to take a moment to let everyone in on some tips that I’m actively implementing in my own life this spring, in the hopes that some of you will find them helpful.

1. Do less.

This might sound controversial, but now is a good time to not try harder. To not go the extra mile. To not give your 110%. We’re constantly bombarded with messages about reaching our full potential and making the best of the horrifying times we live in, but that’s a sure-fire way to drive your long-term mental health straight into a brick wall.

Many of us have lost loved ones during this time. Many of us have lost careers, moments with friends, and important life milestones. It’s okay, and actually really healthy, to take a pause and mourn these things.

Loss is something we’re all dealing with right now, so if you can afford to, drop a class. Cancel a shift. Free up an hour or two where you can just lie around with a cup of tea and not feel guilty about it. This is how we heal.

2. Carve out some physical space for yourself.

When I moved back into my parents’ house for the shelter-in-place last March, I discovered that in the four years I’d been off at college, my “side” of our shared room had been entirely taken over by my little sister. It was clear I wasn’t getting it back.

The truth was, I’d been gone long enough that I no longer knew where my place was at home; I was so different now from the 18-year-old child who lived here before. There was definitely some conflict as my parents and I learned how to live together as adults.

But one thing I wish I’d done earlier? Made space for myself. My “work area” right now is a blanket fort I’ve built in a corner beneath an old table, so it really isn’t much. But ever since I built it, having just this small space to myself has made it so much easier to keep track of my belongings and take care of my mental health. Physical space matters.

3. Is there sunlight where you live? Great. Go sit in it.

Sunlight is important for vitamin D. Vitamin D deficiency manifests as depression (among other things). Sunlight can literally make you happier. So as the days get longer and sunlight becomes more abundant, it’s a really smart move to take a few minutes each day to sit by a window.

Personally, I enjoy going on daytime walks because it works some movement into my routine. But if you’re too busy or just not feeling up to it, it’s equally helpful to rest in the sun with a book or snack or even while scrolling on your phone.

(I like using music to time activities, and this four-minute song by Hozier is perfect for a quick sun break.)

4. Invest in a coloring book and some crayons.

The quarantine life has us spending nearly all of our waking hours staring at screens, and for good reason: that’s where work is, that’s where school is, that’s where friends and family are.

And that’s also where fun is, from social media to video games to our favorite shows and e-books. So while it totally makes sense that we spend most of our time with our devices, I’ve found myself battling headaches a lot more these past few months.

Something that’s helped? Coloring. Now, I’ll color something while watching a show or music video, instead of reaching for my phone. If I’m just looking to pass the time before calling it a night, I’ll color instead of doomscrolling. Once you get over the indignity of feeling like a four-year-old, it’s actually a lot of fun! (Hey, just kidding. Coloring is for everyone, okay?)

5. Snacks. (And a water bottle.)

Look, right now - and I cannot emphasize this enough - is NOT the time to worry about putting on a few pounds. It’s happened to me, it’s happened to nearly everyone I know, and it’s probably something you’re dealing with, too.

This is not a bad thing. Gaining weight is your body’s way of preparing itself to outlive a crisis. It’s just your body trying to adapt and keep you safe. What’s far more dangerous is going hungry, either on purpose or because you forgot to eat.

So if you can, keep some non-perishable snacks on hand, like nuts and crackers. Leave a few in your workspace along with a bottle of water, and make sure you’re eating and drinking at regular intervals. Staying fed and hydrated will boost your mood and help you find the energy you need to deal with your day.

That’s all I’ve got for you guys today. I know the pressure is ON to clean, organize, and turn your life around this spring, but just know that if the only thing you do today is treat yourself to some water and a saltine cracker, that’s okay. That’s enough. Be as gentle with yourself as you’d be with a puppy you rescued from a flood, because for a lot of us, that’s what life feels like right now.

And remember, we’re not meant to do this alone. If you’re struggling, please reach out to a confidential helpline, such as the National Suicide Prevention Hotline or the Crisis Text Line. We’re here for you.