A Doctor Drew an Eyeball on My Arm

Everything happens at once, right?

But everything also happens for a Reason, right?

_____ *** Part I ***________

After not having any epileptic seizures for months, I had several Sunday-Monday, 10/5 & 10/6/2024. 😥 I loathe having my brain rebooted. It's awful. Until this week, I had thought I finally had these attacks under control, using my latest prescribed combination of meds. I had just recently published a poem about it here on Vocal—> ⚡ Brain Bursts ⚡

Because the seizures ravage my memory, I now keep reams of notes and a kind of diary. I'm always trying to figure out what the catalysts are for these electrical storms in my head-— why did I suddenly have several seizures after not having any since mid-June?

I have theories. I discovered we had not only a small natural gas leak in the kitchen (the gas dryer), that same dryer had a clogged flume that could have resulted in a carbon monoxide buildup. We've had all those issues now repaired.

My dearest-loved-one thought maybe I had pneumonia. I had pneumonia in the past and went unaware of it for a while. My memory is very spotty because of the seizures. Yes, absolutely, a fever (or even a severe common cold) can cause me to suffer an attack. But when I took my temperature with a thermometer, it was low, not high. And throughout those two days of seizures, I was freezing, even when huddled beneath a mountain of blankets, so it made sense to me that my temperature reading was low. My hands are always cold— my toes, my shoulders, my ears. I wear layers and layers and layers of clothes. (I'm investigating if I need to take an iron supplement.)

Prolonged carbon monoxide exposure can also lead to hypothermia.

If a person has any kind of gas buildup in their home, it causes their nose to be super sensitive. I kept smelling foul odors. And guess what I did? I opened a window in the bathroom to get some fresh air, but the shade was down, so it wasn't obvious the window was open. Then, when I had the first seizure, it wiped my short-term memory; I forgot that window was open. And it gets really cold 🥶 at night in October in central Indiana! So, after several more seizures, including one in that bathroom, I discovered the window was open, contributing to my low body temp. Doh!!!

I'm my own worst enemy (which is why I carry that crescent-shaped yellow shield.😂 )

I'm now convinced everything (the gasses, the cold nights and open window) — everything together combined to lower my body temp, not raise it with a fever, and that's what caused me this grief. 🫤 Figuring out what the catalyst is for these seizures is never easy and never certain. Amateur detective skills are hard enough to acquire. What I really need is medical detective expertise.

But life is only difficult if you think it shouldn't be difficult, right? Every Challenge just leads to Growth.

I often fail at remaining positive, but I do try!!!

_____ *** Part II ***________

So, after those two days of seizures, by happenstance, I had outpatient surgery scheduled on Wednesday. For reasons I'm about to explain, I didn't want to postpone it. I had to have a small spot of melanoma removed from my left arm. A month ago, it looked like this..... 👇

I think this is an interesting story, in-and-of-itself. You be the judge. Tell me if you have any advice when you hear what happened.

I first became concerned about that ☝️spot on my arm two years ago. I asked my primary care physician about it. She referred me to a dermatologist, who checked it out and said, "Nothing to worry about."

__________TWO YEARS LATER

I now have a different primary care physician. At a recent appointment, when I showed her the spot, she expressed immediate concern. She said, "You may need that cut out." Damn. "Cut out" was definitely not what I wanted or expected to hear. I have other moles on my body not that much different in appearance. When they were checked, none of those others were cause for concern.

The soonest I could see a dermatologist here in my city of Anderson was next February. I didn't want to wait that long. I found an opening at the office in Indianapolis, about a 45 min drive away. I can't drive anyway; thankfully, my insurance provides transportation, so I don't have to bug my friends. Riding with the drivers provided by insurance just involves long waits for pickups.

Patience is a virtue. ⚡

I first saw this new/current dermatologist just shy of a month ago. He couldn't tell if it was bothersome skin issue without doing a biopsy. So, he sliced out a piece of my left front forearm, roughly the size of a nickel.

They sent that specimen off to the lab. And wouldn't you know it? A week later, it came back cancerous. It had also penetrated to the second layer of skin.

Imagine my surprise! 🫤

I immediately tried to track down the dermatologist that I saw a couple years ago. I had his number saved in my phone. I called him. The line immediately disconnected. I checked his Internet listing. Same phone number. I tried to call it repeatedly and it always disconnected without ringing once.

He was an old guy. Older than me and I'm not exactly young. I wonder: did he pass away? Or did he just retire after avoiding doing biopsies on people (like me) his last few years in practice? Kinda frustrating. This should have been caught two years ago and if it had been, my current dermatologist wouldn't have had to cut so deep.

What would you do if you found out a doctor of yours neglected to give you the correct treatment and then he just vanished?

________ *** __________

The surgical chair for this procedure was very similar to the kind I'd sit in at a dentist. It even had the huge kind of light on a pivot above my head— the kind of light I associate with a dental exam. A few things were different though. An armrest was positioned under my left arm. The nurse then 'grounded' my right hand by placing it on a big square metal plate. I'm unclear why. {Because I'm secretly an electric-charged superhero, I would guess. 🤷}

Dr. Dent the dermatologist had to go long and wide to make sure he expanded the incision beyond the edges of the affected area. The slicing was preceded by this.... 👇 ...he drew what looked like a huge eyeball on my arm.

Dr. Dent then left to go see other patients. His nurse did the numbing— lots of needle sticks. 😣😱😥😱 After that, she and I talked, while waiting on the dermatologist to come back. He finally did return, and the slicing began. He cut down to "just above the muscle."

Isn't 'just' a relative term? 😣

I didn't watch. While he used his scalpel on me, I looked away and had a conversation with him about the music playing on their sound system. I didn't criticize their playlist, even though it mostly sucked. Criticism always seems unwise to me when someone is wielding a knife at close quarters. 😂 We also talked about sleep. He admitted he didn't sleep well, and his wife recently kicked him to guest bedroom. I shared fun facts I know about how humans enter into a light sleep after our dream cycles, which happen every 90 minutes during unconsciousness. Dr. Dent and I also talked about the smell of my burnt flesh when he cauterized the wound (about how someone would seriously need to be a serial killer to enjoy that unusual odor <—my observation. 😂)

Honestly— Dr. Dent's 'bedside manner' sucked. 🫤 When I asked him about any concerns about the melanoma spreading since it had penetrated down to the second layer, he said something like, "Well, we can never be sure." I know nothing in life is certain, of course, but you'd think he would have had plenty of time over the years to prepare a more comforting answer.

The procedure wasn't traumatic though. It sounds worse to describe than it felt. After cutting out that swath of skin down to the muscle, he cauterized all the capillaries. 🔥💨 Yuck. Then he sewed in two layers of stitches. The lower layer dissolves. The outer stitches have to be removed in two weeks. When he was putting in the fun-looking top sutures, I joked it kinda felt like he was lacing up my shoes on my arm. That oddball comment made Brittany-the-nurse laugh, so my mission was complete.

Brittany took this picture 👇 of my arm when they finished.

Creepy, right? I can go as Frankenstein this Halloween! The hard part of a Franky costume is already done. I just need some green paint. I still have those old neck electrodes from my college days. 🤣😂

My arm is swollen as hell today. I'm icing it down with popsicles... which makes me sooo 🥶 cold.

No lifting for a while. Can't get it wet for a couple days. After 48 hours I was finally able to change the bandages. With help, of course.

I'm grateful.

_____Fun Times in the Big City!

Honestly— I am eager to see what the scar will look like. Maybe I can eventually overlap a lightning bolt tattoo on top of it?

I typed the beginning of this post yesterday one-fingered on my phone. But today I'm operating with two hands again.

Life never ceases to amaze!

👁️⚡

No matter how bad a situation may seem, it's never that bad. Perspective makes all the difference. A dark sense of humor doesn't hurt either. Especially when a dermatologist draws an eyeball on your arm.

___________________Bolt ⚡

Another eyeball of mine in a long-ass guaranteed-original bizarre-as-fuck horror story. 👁️🧠☝️

I appreciate your support.