You Are Selfish If You Use These 8 Phrases

There is a difference between assertiveness and being selfish and this difference is all in the language. Selfish people use these phrases to push their agenda while ignoring the needs and feelings of others. These phrases are constantly used daily according to psychology and unfortunately, many of those who use these phrases may not realize it. The following are the 8 phrases that may expose you as a self-centered person.

1. That is Not My Problem

This is one of the phrases you will encounter more times than you can count. It simply reveals someone who lacks empathy and it is associated with selfishness. Sometimes people are more interested in protecting their convenience instead of taking responsibility. For instance, roommates skip their dishes and clean up after them. Be alert when you come across phrases like “It’s not my problem”, it is a pointer to a selfish attitude.

2. I Deserve…

People with selfish tendencies also use the phrase; “I deserve” quite often. This phrase may reveal an inherent belief that these selfish people are entitled to certain things regardless of the opinions and feelings of others.

It’s all about what they believe they are owed, and they don’t hold back when expressing it. The phrase “I deserve” may come with a different context, it could be the demand for an undeserved promotion, to expecting preferential treatment in a relationship. Whatever the case may be, the feelings and opinions of others are often sidelined. It’s one thing to know your worth, it’s another thing to ignore others’ feelings and rights.

3. I Want…

Another common phrase heard from selfish people is “I want”. It is a statement that depicts a self-centered mindset.

These people tend to tend to steer conversations towards the direction of their needs; What they want to eat, the kind of movies they want to watch, and so on. They often ignore the preferences of others.

The “I want” mindset shows a person’s inability to see beyond their desire. Though it is completely okay to express your preferences and desires, it becomes a problem when you completely ignore other people’s desires.

4. I Don’t Care…

Selfish people resort to this phrase when confronted with situations that don’t align with their desires and interests. These are people who lack empathy and have some tendencies toward narcism. They use such phrases as a shield to dismiss the ideas, feelings, and needs of others. People may occasionally use this phrase in their off-days, hence you shouldn’t be too quick to judge anyone by this phrase only.

5. Why Should I

Why should I is a statement selfish people make when asked to do something outside of their realm or preference. They use the phrase to question the need to exert any effort when they wouldn’t benefit from the situation. These are people who value only actions that will bring them some gains.

It is also a phrase that indicates an individual’s inability to do others a favor without expecting something in return.

6. You Always…

When selfish people want to deflect attention from themselves, they say things like “You always…” This statement is typically used to blame others thus creating a narrative where the selfish individuals appear to be the victim.

It can be painful to have this phrase used against you especially when you are innocent, it makes you feel like you are doing something wrong always while the perpetrator never claims responsibility for their actions. It is a phrase used in manipulating situations to their favor while shifting focus away from their selfish act.

Since this phrase can cause an emotional drain on the victims, you should stand up for yourself consistently until they stop using such phrases against you.

7. I, My, Me…

The frequent use of words like me, my, and I can suggest someone is selfish. These words often said by a self-centered person may highlight the focus on an individual’s needs which may overshadow others. According to research published in the Journal of Research in Personality, individuals who use pronouns like I, My, and Me are more likely to exhibit traits of narcism.

This does not mean using these phrases is wrong in every situation, it is all about the frequency and context in which they are used. Those who use the words consistently while dismissing the feelings of others are considered selfish. Remember, communication is the key hence you shouldn’t be in a hurry to judge people who use these words unless you know and understand their intentions.

8. I’m Busy

I’m busy is a phrase used by selfish individuals recklessly as an excuse to avoid responsibilities or commitments. We are all busy and we should communicate this to others ahead of their requests, however, when this phrase is used too frequently even when the victims know we are lying, then it makes us seem selfish.

Selfish people use this phrase to evade helping others especially when they have time to enjoy their leisure and request help from others often.

Remember, everyone has their responsibilities and commitment hence it is worth having a conversation about it before passing judgment.