True Love and Its Many Expressions

Many people say true love happens only once, like a huge, magical, unrepeatable experience. But I really don't think that's true. My own life has shown me that love is much bigger and more varied than that. I've felt truly deep and meaningful love more than just one time. I'm pretty sure there are lots of other people who also question the idea that true love is such a limited thing. I am confident that countless others share this perspective, questioning the exclusivity often associated with "true love."

My dissent stems from the fundamental conviction that an emotion as deeply personal and intrinsically private as love cannot be confined by the collective experiences or generalized opinions of others. Attempting to understand "true love" through the lens of public narratives or by passively observing others' relationships feels inherently inadequate. Comprehending such a profound feeling is not akin to conducting scientific research or analyzing statistical data; it resonates within the individual soul, shaped by unique experiences and perspectives.

Consider the parallel of expressing physical ailments. Individuals often struggle to articulate their physical sensations accurately, even within the structured environment of a medical consultation. Describing the precise nature or intensity of pain can be challenging, requiring a skilled practitioner to ask probing questions to arrive at a diagnosis and treatment plan. If we find it difficult to verbalize something as tangible as physical discomfort, how can we possibly expect to universally define or comprehend an emotion as abstract and multifaceted as "true love" through external observations alone? The very act of translating such profound inner feelings into words can be an arduous task for many.

Therefore, how can I reconcile the assertion that true love occurs only once, or why am I so convinced that this concept, as commonly understood, is often vague and, in some respects, inaccurate? The answer lies in the rich tapestry of my own life. I've been lucky enough to experience what I know was true love twice in my life, and both times it changed me deeply. Each of these experiences, while unfolding under different circumstances and with different individuals, shared a core essence of profound connection, unwavering affection, and a deeply felt, almost sacred bond. To dismiss these experiences as something less than "true love" simply because they occurred more than once would be to invalidate the genuine depth and enduring impact they had on my life. My personal history stands as compelling evidence for the possibility of experiencing true, pure, and even what some might call divine love, multiple times within a single lifetime.

My first encounter with this profound love began at the dawn of my awareness, when I opened my eyes and experienced a true and pure divine love from a man who cherished me unconditionally. Regardless of my appearance, my nascent habits, or my inherent nature, in his eyes, I was and would always be the most beautiful being God had ever created. He was my first teacher in the intricate arts of loving and being loved, of understanding hate and respect, of knowing when to fight and when to yield, of embracing truthfulness and genuineness, and of practicing honesty and kindness. He instilled in me the spirit of unreserved giving, the strength of unwavering confidence, the ability to offer constructive criticism and hold firm opinions, all while being an unwavering pillar of support and reliability. He nurtured in me an unshakeable belief in my own potential, convincing me that no goal was beyond my reach and no height too lofty to ascend. Above all, he imparted the invaluable lesson of never trading my self-respect for any worldly gain, emphasizing that self-respect is the most precious adornment a woman can ever possess.

With simple gestures and everyday moments, he imparted profound life lessons. He taught me that true wealth lies not in material possessions but in the legacy, we leave behind – the impact we have on the world. He showed me how to build a legacy that endures through generations, unchanged by time: through good deeds, a pure heart, and a helpful soul. He explained that to become noticeably unforgettable requires a heart free from corruption and a steadfast commitment to standing against injustice and evil. This man, who so profoundly shaped the woman I am today, never asked for anything in return, not even a simple "thank you."

What is this, if not true love in its purest form?

Yes, this is the truest and most unadulterated form of love, and in a woman's life, it often emanates from one person and one person alone: the father who will never knowingly cause her harm. My only regret in his invaluable teachings is that while he equipped me with the strength to navigate this often-cruel world.

But I was tragically unaware that I would one day need that very strength to learn to live without this extraordinary man, whose love for me was boundless and unconditional.

Well, indeed sometimes, "being strong is your greatest curse."

I will forever remain indebted to him, for the entirety of my life and beyond, for the immeasurable gifts he bestowed upon me, while I could offer him so little in return.

"He taught me everything, but did not teach me how to live without him."

The second time I experienced true love was with a captivating young boy who stole my heart at first sight. His striking handsomeness was undeniable, his playful yet kind nature endearing, and his mischievous, unforgettable smile remains as vivid in my memory as if it were yesterday. It took time and effort to win his affection, to understand his desires and bring him joy. Yet, each time I believed I had achieved my goal of earning his favor, he would present another need, another expectation I felt compelled to meet to deepen his affection for me. In this ongoing dance of striving and letting go, my love for him grew ever deeper. He became that person in my life for whom I would willingly endure any pain or discomfort to offer him solace and support.

Sleepless nights and challenging days held no regrets, for I dedicated countless hours, days, months, and years to guiding him, hoping to steer him away from pitfalls and equip him with the skills and confidence to face the world. I have stayed awake through the darkest hours, simply to watch him drift to sleep in my lap, to press a tender kiss upon his forehead, and have shed tears of both joy at his triumphs and sorrow at his pain. We have shared countless precious moments, exploring every imaginable place on his youthful bucket list, and I have lavished upon him expensive and meaningful gifts, even when it meant sacrificing my own needs.

And above all I have often embarrassed him by openly displaying my affection for him publicly, regardless of his youthful self-consciousness.

I have encouraged him to voice his opinions, whether popular or not, I have taught him to be kind yet direct, confident and strong, bold yet graceful and in return, he has gifted me with the profound confidence that I am accomplished and have nothing to prove to the world. But perhaps the most precious gift he has given me is the unwavering acceptance to simply be myself, in all my imperfections., and for him, that is enough, and for me, it is enough that he embraces me, with all my flaws and cracks .

"He completes me," in a way that is unique and profound. But as I said , sometimes strength can feel like a curse.

I know that one day I will have to let him go, a prospect that leaves a void in my soul, yet leaving me no other option but to be brave . This remarkable young man is none other than my son.

So, I ask you again , is this not a true and pure form of love?

We often overlook the diverse spectrum of love, instinctively gravitating towards its most adaptable and often unreliable form – romantic love. We tend to romanticize it, and failure in this realm often becomes a source of profound disappointment, blinding us to the other equally valid and potent forms of love that surround us. We forget that true love exists in the realm of the divine and in the unconditional approach we take towards others. God is true love, family is true love, our passions and dreams are true love, our ambitions are true love. When we are surrounded by so many expressions of pure love, why do we so often fixate on a form that is inherently subject to the vagaries of time and circumstance? A true companion, in any form, will accept and cherish you for who you are, not for who they wish you to be. And perhaps that is why discerning the truthfulness and depth of love can be such a delicate and intricate endeavor.

To wrap it up simply: Lots of people think true love only happens once. But because I've felt really deep, life-changing love more than once, I think our hearts can connect with people in a big way multiple times. So, maybe instead of worrying if it's "the only one," we should just be thankful for the real love we have in our lives, whenever it shows up.