The bigger picture

I am 22 years old indian girl . I just moved to canada 2 years back all by myself and before that i was living with my parents back home in india . finding me my true passion was quite a challenge . When i was 17 years old i saw Victoria’s secret fashion show for the first time. being a teen i was blown away by looking at how beautiful models were , walking in such a killer attitude , that i just couldn’t stop thinking about it the whole time , i started watching the show, day and night and decided that i want to be a VS model . I am blessed with good genetics as i am 5.8 inches tall and weights about 56 kgs so that was not a problem but i knew my parents were not going to allow me so i kept it in my heart until i came here in canada all alone and i started to actually do things to prepare myself to get signed up with some reputed modeling agencies ,like controlled eating , working out and as i was all by myself i was not able to afford a professional photoshoot for my portfolio so i started to take my own pictures myself. here are some :

I thought modeling is my real passion , and as the due date came closer that i gave to myself to go for signing up with some modeling agency i realised that i don’t feel same about modeling anymore and it doesn’t give me any peace but give me some anxiety instead . I started to loose my interest and even after all the hard work that i putted in , i never even went for signing up . And i just lost my track i felt so confused . I dropped out of the college and locked myself in the room , i introspected a lot and i realised that modeling was never my passion it was my childhood insecurities ( in india being this tall and skinny is considered abnormal so i faced a-lot of negative commenting ) which led me to choose this as way of making myself feel beautiful and proving people that i am beautiful .

If not this, then what is my true passion ? This was the question in my mind . Since childhood I’ve always been a person of depth , i love things which have deeper meanings for example : magic , meditation , our universe, law of attraction etc. i used to sit out on my terrace back in india and stare at the moon for hrs and hrs it just cools me down .

So, when i lost my passion for modeling i again got pulled back to just sit out and stare the night sky . It heals me . So deep , never ending . i got a thought that this is what i have loved doing always since i was a kid , no time has bothered me , nobody ever paid me for doing this , this brings me bliss , this is something for which i can even drop my work plans , and this is and has always been my true passion .

It was like the universe aligned with me and i started getting so many you tube video recommendation explaining the mysterious ways the universe works , composition of a star , ours and millions of solar systems out there so i got even more into everything to the point where i had no choice but to get myself a telescope , i got one beginner telescope here is it :

By this time i was half way through the degree in which i was enrolled in - associate degree majoring psychology which i enjoy too and i am still finishing it up and i have decided to go for space science course after finishing my present education .

Me and my friend we went to the beach after buying the telescope at midnight to view the moon and oh my god! What a beauty it is here is what i saw :

And since than i have gone to so many stargazing sessions and every-time i go , i always find a deeper purpose of life . It makes me feel connected to the source . So many times i went away from city lights on a moon less nights i saw , asteroids( space rocks) and so much space debris crossing above our planet which we see sometimes as shooting stars , and satellites revolving above us , best part is milky way’s ( our galaxy) part which is all visible with naked eyes . Few months back there was Jupiter and Saturn’s conjunction event which happens every 400 year i saw that too . It is mind blowing to realise that your own world is nothing . how far the humanity is from the truth of life is reason i think people should follow or at least get little engaged in something that is bigger than us all .

Planet earth is definitely not a permanent place for humanity to exists as we get our life from sun which is a star , and all the stars have limited life time only, so in few million or billion years sun is going to explode , also earth’s population is rising at a rate that it is overtaking earth’s capacity to handle . In other words resources are limited but people are increasing rapidly ,and there are so many more events happening in the universe which can lead to early destruction of our planet including , comet collisions or nearby star explosion etc . and even if we take a look at our planet’s evolution we can see earth has been destructed and came back to life several times. due to this reason i think people should follow space science as it is probable that humanity is going to turn itself into interstellar species sooner if not now . The other reason i think people should get engaged into space sciences is , that in today’s world everybody is so involved in their work and personal life issues as if everything is permanent and as they are going to stay here forever , when we look up , we come to know there are so many planets , more stars like our sun , many galaxies and even more universe like ours ( multiverse) together and we realise that how tiny and temporary is our world and how precise each single detail might have been, our magnetic field which protects us from solar storms , our atmosphere which shields us from solar radiations , our earth’s tilt and distance of moon from earth and so much more for the life to came into existence on earth ,even if have been little different there might have been no life on earth . Science has confirmed that everything is energy , if we look deeper inside anything the last we could see is energy , so that is the basic unit. now this tells us we are energy and universe is energy which means we are one , which is important for people to know because most of the people have forgotten that the problems they think they have doesn’t even exist as energy can only change forms which power we human beings have , that is our thoughts , in order to change your problem into happiness you need to make the energy change its form , by that i mean by thinking good and positive thoughts , by living in present and always keeping in mind the bigger truth of life . People can sit out under stars , look at the moon , meditate if they don’t want to get in deeper space studies , but just one thing i will end it with , how will you be able to learn guitar , dance , sing , write , paint , draw, workout if our planet will not survive .