Permission to Pause

I Am Bored.

This is simply not a statement I can relate to. There’s a constant, nagging “to-do list” running in the back of my mind, reminding me that there’s always more to be done.

But this mental list isn’t a product of being organized or balanced. Quite the opposite—one of my biggest struggles is learning how to turn my brain off.

I have a million ideas I want to explore, but I often get distracted, overwhelmed, and stuck in negative thoughts. This vicious cycle causes me to shut down, accomplishing very little.

When I put too much on my plate, I freeze. I don’t know where to start. But I feel like I must start immediately.

Time is ticking…

I berate myself:

“Why are you wasting so much time? Look at all the things you could be doing.”

This mindset follows me everywhere. When it’s time to rest, my mind refuses. When it’s time for fun or self-care, a big inner conflict arises.

I’ve convinced myself that I haven’t “earned” those luxuries. I haven’t finished—or even started—everything I’ve set out to do. I become disappointed in myself and beat myself up over the time I’ve lost. The idea of rewarding myself seems absurd because, in my mind, I haven’t done enough to deserve it.

And so, the cycle continues.

Breaking the Cycle

It’s taken a lot of self-reflection to recognize this destructive pattern, and even more effort to change it. The process hasn’t been easy. I still make mistakes. I still slip up. I’m human.

Oddly enough, that’s been one of the hardest truths for me to accept. I’ve realized I rarely show myself the same compassion I give others.

Does this sound familiar?

Do you feel overworked and run-down, yet constantly believe you haven’t accomplished enough? If so, I encourage you to pause for a moment and reflect.

A Moment of Clarity

Take a second to silence distractions, especially the ones in your mind. Be fully present in the moment. Then ask yourself these questions:

• What do you do when your phone, computer, or tablet has a low battery?

You connect it to a charger, right? If you didn’t, it would shut down completely and be useless until recharged.

• What do you do when your car is running out of gas?

You refuel it. Otherwise, it won’t take you anywhere.

• What would you tell a loved one who’s burning themselves out?

You’d remind them to slow down. You’d tell them that they can’t keep running on empty.

Now, consider this: Why don’t the same standards apply to us?

Role Reversal

• What do you tell yourself when you find flaws in something you’ve worked hard on?

Do you call it a failure? Do you call yourself a failure? Do you tell yourself to just give up?

• What would you say to a friend in the same situation?

Would you tell them what a failure they are? Would you tell them to give up? Probably not. You’d encourage them to keep going, to trust the process, and to recognize their growth.

So why don’t we offer ourselves the same understanding?

The Hard Questions

• Why do we prioritize recharging our devices but not ourselves?

• Why do we urge others to rest but push ourselves to exhaustion?

• Why do we celebrate others’ successes but downplay our own?

• Why do we view failures as learning opportunities for others but as proof of inadequacy in ourselves?

We deserve the same compassion we give others. Yet, so often, we neglect ourselves.

The Bigger Picture

When something is drained—whether it’s a phone, a car, or even a loved one—we recognize the need to recharge or refuel. We understand this instinctively, without question.

• So why is it so hard to apply the same logic to ourselves?

• Why do we push ourselves so hard when we’re exhausted?

• Why do we expect immediate success instead of embracing growth?

• Why do we speak to ourselves in ways we’d never speak to others?

Reflection and Action

Take a moment to reflect. Absorb the reality of your answers.

• Show yourself the same love and patience you give others.

• Celebrate your successes, no matter how small.

• Allow yourself the grace to rest and recharge.

You deserve to live your happiest, most fulfilling life. And both you and the world deserve to see you living it.