How to trust others and gain trust yourself.

Trust is something we as human beings need to survive. We trust people to process and cook our food, to drive us, to build our homes, to be there for us, and to keep us safe. Many people do not realize the importance of trust which can lead to issues with the others around them. For some people, trusting and firmly believing people can be difficult. Sometimes people have bad experiences when it comes to trusting people. Maybe someone read something that you wanted private, like a diary, or shared your secrets. However some people just build walls around themselves because of anxiety, or stress. One thing is for sure, trust is something everyone should learn if they yearn for a happy life.

A common place I personally have to trust in people is at school. For example, when presenting things in the classroom I try to trust that my classmates won’t judge me if I mess up. I also choose to trust the staff around me to keep my learning environment safe. One very important place I need to use trust is at home. If I don’t trust my mom or dad then I could get into huge trouble or maybe even put myself in danger. My parents are the people I should trust the most. They’re the people who will always be there for me, no matter what. Trust isn’t something that can be faked or forced. It’s something that takes time, patience, and everyone putting in equal effort to keep it alive. I believe this is why some people struggle with trusting. It’s a difficult thing to earn and some people just give up trying.

There are a ton of different ways you can build trust with people; whether it be with a person you're in a relationship with, someone you work with, your parents, your best friend, or a person you just met. Some common and easy ways to build trust is to tell the truth, admit when you don’t know something, own up to your mistakes, keep your promises, extend your trust to others, and respect other people's privacy. Telling the truth, owning up to mistakes, and keeping promises is key to building and strengthening trust because it’s usually one of the first interactions you have with others, meaning it is a part of a first impression. Trust can be built up between people, but even quicker it can be destroyed. Which is something anyone, no matter who you are, can forget sometimes. That is why you can always take a minute to check in with people and try to strengthen your connections. That can help in building up the trust between you and a friend, family member, partner, or anyone else in your life.

For me personally I struggle with trusting people because I worry, and have built a wall around myself. However, I talk, and overshare a lot making it seem like I trust people even when I don’t fully. That isn’t fair to anyone around me and can just cause many problems like I said before. I’m trying though, no matter how many times I say that I really am. It might take a while but I know that life would be so much better if I just trusted the people around me. For example, I need to trust the people at home; My mom, dad, siblings, even my 6 pets. I need to trust my friends, teachers, even the random cashier at Walgreens.

I’m not exactly sure when this wall was built around me, but somewhere around 7th grade when my mental health started declining and I also realized that I was gay. I was scared of the opinion of others and didn’t trust that there would be people who would love me for me. That was a mistake on my part and I started separating myself instead of trying to tell the people closest to m about my feelings. However, I do know that I need to start letting people in. I need to stop worrying and try to figure out how to control the anxiety I feel when it comes to trusting people.

Anyways, take a moment to check in on your loved ones and strengthen the trust you have with each other. You never know when that could be what you need to keep going.