Motivation logo

How To Achieve The Confidence You've Always Wanted

Have you always wanted to be confident? Here's how

By Robert CordrayPublished 5 years ago 3 min read

Someone who exudes confidence has a way of lighting up a room. The energy a poised person gives off can feel exciting and infectious, and yet, for many unattainable. You are not the only one who has ever felt that way. You too can be more assertive and self-assured. If you want to embrace a more confident you, here are a few tips to get you there.

Identify What Makes You Feel Self-Conscious

If you want to improve your confidence levels, identifying what is getting in the way of that can be a big step. Because you are likely your harshest critic, you are likely more focused on your insecurities than others. If they are detracting from how you feel about yourself, there are often ways that you can address these doubts. You can transform yourself if you want to. With laser eye surgery or contacts, you can get rid of your glasses or with invisalign Chandler AZ, you can get straighter teeth, you have options. It is important to remind yourself that you likely notice these more than anyone else and you should not let these make you feel less than.

Stop Tearing Yourself Down

Because many people are often their own worst critics, you need to rid yourself of the constant negative talk and show yourself some self-compassion. If you don’t stop tearing yourself down, you’ll never be able to build up confidence. A useful point of reference and check for yourself is, if you would not say this to your closest friend, you should not say it to yourself. It is up to you to stop this negative cycle of beating yourself up. Instead, tear down your inner critic and let yourself thrive, and you will naturally start to embody a more confident version of yourself when you get out of your own way.

Celebrate Your Successes

While curbing negative talk is an important step, you also need to actively participate in positive self-talk. This can be an immensely hard task for many people. To help you reframe this narrative, start celebrating your successes. By focusing on your successes and how you contributed to them, you can start to see how many wonderful things you are doing and the role you played in it. Consider starting a log of your accomplishments and when things are difficult, revisit this list and remind yourself of how amazing you are.

Fake it Until You Make it

With confidence, it is often best practiced to build it into a habit. Faking it until you make it, can begin to build up patterns of positivity and reaffirm yourself. A great way to start this is to stand up straighter, dress up appropriately, smile and make eye contact. This can signal to others that you feel self-assured and they will respond to your behaviors, reinforcing your confidence. Before you know it, you won’t be faking it anymore.

Rid Yourself of Comparison

The perfect thief that can rob you of your joy and confidence is comparison. When you engage in comparative thinking you focus on the progress and successes of others; however, you will only get half of the picture. When you look at someone else’s life, you only see small snippets from an outsider’s perspective, lacking many additional and often important details. The only person who can truly speak to their lived experience, their challenges and their feelings is that individual. This is why it is unfair and unrealistic for you to compare your life to someone else’s. This is often exacerbated by social media where lives are perfectly curated. If you want to become more confident and poised, stop robbing yourself of the opportunity by comparing yourself to a picture that is only halfway in your view.

If you want to be more confident, it all starts with you. The behaviors and internal monologue are all contributing factors to your level of self-confidence, and luckily, you can influence all of these. Let yourself become a more poised, self-assured and amazing version of yourself by getting out of your own way and let yourself thrive.

self help

About the Creator

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2026 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.