Hardship and Happiness: A Struggler’s guide of How to take back control of Your life

“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.” — Friedrich Nietzsche

If you are mistaking me for one of those eternally optimistic motivational speakers swarming the planet. Please, wait! Let me confess right away I am at the lowest ebb of the tide. My life is undisciplined, my behavior is erratic, and my routine is disrupted.

Because I am passing through a difficult phase of life and struggling to keep myself motivated and happy.

Then why am I writing this piece, and why should you read it?

To share the pain and connect with people passing through the same phase. Are you ready to reclaim the lost sense of happiness and work out an action plan to achieve that goal?

Enough is enough! rise together to take the challenge head-on.

What is the Challenge?

The modern lifestyle is demanding and full of worries and anxieties. Each one of us is dealing with his own set of worries and fears.

The fear of a loan default, unpaid bills, losing a job, performance pressures, health concerns, and strained relationships are most the most common worries that are exacting a heavy toll on our mental and physical health.

All of this worrying results in constant anxiety and low self-esteem. It drains the passion and energy out of us. We may appear to be smiling or laughing, but we don’t feel it inside our souls. Little by little, through the ordeal, our personality becomes infected with the following four negative emotions:

Resentment — Jealousy — Regret — Loneliness

What is the Antidote?

Amid all this doom and gloom, we need to remember that life is a constant struggle for every living soul. And the only way of passing this test is to never give up our right to joy.

Happiness is not entirely based on chance and circumstances.

According to Richard Davidson, founder of the Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin and author of The book “Emotional Life of Your Brain”, neuroscientific Studies have shown that happiness is a skill, like any other skill, that we can master through learning and practice.

However, it requires adopting and developing certain behaviors to shift our focus from negativity to positivity. We can call these sub-skills of happiness.

So let’s start our journey on the path of finding happiness and purpose in life.

First off, we will understand 04 sub-skills that will prepare us to face life’s challenges with courage and determination.

1. Acceptance

Life is difficult and unpredictable. The Theory of evolution tells us that loss and suffering are the building blocks of life, while comfort and happiness are much-needed breaks so that we do not get roasted along the way. Believe me, life spares no one, even the ones whose lives we often envy. We may not know their pain — but it is always there.

Therefore, accepting the reality of life will help relieve much of the pain and frustration. Getting comfortable with reality is key to happiness.

2. Resilience

Resilience or mental toughness is simply the quality of how fast and effectively we bounce back from an upsetting situation and move forward. Think of it as a rubber band that comes to its normal position every time after being stretched and released. It gives us the capacity to face up challenges effectively and flourish in the face of adversity.

Experts believe that resilience is a quality that can be developed and improved through effort and consistency. It is hard to master the skill, but not entirely impossible. It requires being developed on both mental and physical levels.

3. Positive Outlook

Do you know that the Gotthard Base Tunnel in Switzerland is the world’s longest and deepest tunnel running under the Swiss Alps? Despite that, there is light at both ends of the tunnel. This means no matter how deep and dragged our ordeal is, there is always a beginning and an end.

We should remain hopeful about our future while remembering our past achievements. This motivation builds up the determination and strength required for coming out of any mess intact.

Do not lose sight of ground realities, but being driven by negativity is also not good. To balance the act, keep a positive outlook on life. Being optimistic is one of the important competencies of resilience as well.

4. Physical and Mental Fitness

Nothing good comes out of a sick mind and body. When confronted with life’s hardships, it is natural to lose sight of our wellbeing spiraling down into the cycle of despair and despondency.

We stop caring for our mental and physical health. This attitude only compounds our problems. To break free from this cycle, we need to develop healthy habits and engage in constructive activities.

Action Plan for developing these 04 skills

Below, I have developed a course of action to master the skills we discussed above. It is an attempt to bring discipline and purpose into life.

There is nothing unique about these actionable points. perhaps, you are already familiar with most of these trips and tricks, but knowing them is not enough. it is the will and consistency to act that matters.

Plan your life

• Introduce a daily routine and stick to it. Slice the day into segments and allocate different activities to each segment with a timetable.
• Sleep and wake up early. Take a good night’s sleep of 7–9 hours daily. Do not deprive yourself of sleep. A well-rested body is necessary for an alert and active mind.
• Make physical exercise an integral part of your daily routine. Walking, running, or cycling are among the most common options for a beginner.
• If possible, join a gym for a proper workout routine. Remember, whatever option you choose, has to be consistent, easy, and enjoyable.
• Commit to a simple but healthy diet. Avoid regular intake of junk food. remain hydrated. Drink 9–13 glasses of water a day as recommended by Mayo Clinic experts.

Developing this daily routine will bring physical and mental health benefits. Along with physical fitness, it will enhance brain power and empower you to control your life.

Grow your network of support

• No matter what the circumstances, get rid of loneliness. Connect yourself with your family, friends, and community.
• Learn to be nice by taking interest in the lives of people around you. Appreciate them and share their joy.
• no one is perfect, so make it a habit to forgive others’ mistakes.

• Offer genuine help to people around you. An act of random kindness to someone no matter how small will not only lift his mood but yours as well.
• Harvard conducted the longest study on happiness lasted over 80 years. And one of the key findings is good relationships keep us happier and healthier.

Remember here that it is the quality of the relationships that matter. So engage yourself with good, caring people.

Engage in positive activities

• Explore your interests, make a list of activities or hobbies you enjoy, and keep yourself busy.

• The options for hobbies are unlimited. Here are a few to prompt your brain. Fishing, swimming, hiking, gardening, collecting (art, card, coins), sports, music, cooking.
• Reading books is another healthy habit. Pick an interesting book and read at least one page per day. Books educate, books provide unique insights about the world and turn you into an intelligent, happier, and empathetic personality.

• Write something every day. It could be a recap of your daily activities, personal opinions about political or social issues, or your grocery list. The key here is to express yourself in a freestyle manner. It will ease up your stress and lead you to the path of self-discovery.

“There is no greater cause of melancholy than idleness” — Robert Burton

Stop complaining and start thanking

• And last but not the least, be grateful to God for his blessings.
• Acknowledge the goodness in life and do not regret what you don’t have.
• Keep your happy memories alive and do not let past mistakes and sorrows overwhelm you.

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” — Oprah Winfrey

In the end, it is time for a customary call to action, but not for an affiliate link or a paid course.

Let’s promise to stand up, take back control of our lives and start the voyage to a happy and fulfilling life.