Delirium of Motivation

Let's face it, staying motivated is hard. Be it preparing for tests, facing unprecedented hardships or just repeating the mundane routine of everyday life, your will to face the unexpected consequences and still keep pushing yourself in the face of adversities needs mental strength - A lot of it!

And we mere mortals do not always have enough drive in us to push ourselves and hence we falter, break down or give up.

Motivation is a quintessential necessity in today’s life. And when we are not able to muster the inner drive to keep going, we look to external sources to boost up our low morale.

Be it reading an inspiring tale of a business magnate, watching old footage of hard-fought wins in a game or talking to our friends - all of these are external means to puff up our will.

This need to stay motivated is a never-ending quest. And at times you desperately seek a means to find the light at the end of the tunnel.

And this is where a slew of motivational products come in. The market and the internet offers you motivational products - podcasts, books, seminars, talk shows, fascinatingly edited videos and even personality coaches to keep you hustling

These motivational speakers, coaches and influencers have a way with their words, they radiate confidence, maintain impeccable body language and tell their stories to which you deeply resonate with. By the end of the show, you are high on motivation and prepared to make a dent in the universe

But just days later, after facing hardships or struggle or just the mundane routine, you again find yourself in the same deep mire of desolation and hopelessness that you promised to bring yourself out of!

You are dejected, confused and in the pursuit of guidance. So once again you knock at the doors of another motivation coach, investing even more time and money into it and hoping to wade better this time.

And yet weeks later you are back to square one. This cycle may repeat a few more times until finally, you realise that you had enough and it was time to call it a day!

This is true not just for you or me, it's true for millions of people around us.

But why does this happen? Why instead of being motivated, do we start getting immune to it? Why is it the harder we try, the more difficult it becomes?

Before digging into it let's take a small detour, shall we?

This is Chris Gardner

When he looked much younger and had hair adoring that shining scalp, Chris was wading through troubled waters. At the age of 27 years, Chris found himself homeless, jobless, hungry, abandoned by his girlfriend with a 4-year toddler to take care of. But it wasn't always this way.

10 years prior, Chris had dreamt of a career in medical sciences. Medical training is not a field for weakly willed. It needs brains, skills and quite a bit of money before you don the starch white coat with a stethoscope loosely hanging over your shoulders and write away illegible prescriptions with an air of authority and wisdom.

Chris on the other was not an average joe by any means. He was academically adept, had the necessary contacts in the industry and was on his way to shaping a career in medicine. But few years down the line, Chris realized that the medical training was too long a process. He would have to dedicate a decade of his life to the training before becoming a professional. Further, health care changes were occurring in this industry that could potentially invalidate all the training he would partake before entering the industry

So, one fine morning, Chris decided to abandon his dream of becoming a doctor and instead started seeking a job that paid well. Unlike the prime-time stories, Chris didn't take a drop for soul searching. It was the other way around; he abandoned his dream in search of greener pasture to mint money. The few years that followed were rough for him. Chris used to work as a research assistant that didn't pay enough. So, he chose to go the entrepreneurial way and started as a salesman, knocking from hospital to hospital to sell his medical scanners.

But this only served to put him in the deeper mire. His business never took off, driving him into more and more debts. No matter how many hospitals he visited or how many times he sought appointments, no one wanted his scanners. With each day, things only got darker. His girlfriend had to run the extra mile, do double shifts and run the house. It was an enormous burden on her to feed three mouths and one fine day she decided to abandon him.

Soon his house owner kicked him out for defaulting on rent.

And that is how at the age of 27, Chris Gardner found himself homeless, jobless, hungry, abandoned by his girlfriend with a 4-year toddler to take care of.

During one of those struggling days, Chris bumped into a stockbroker. It would be an understatement to say that the stockbroker’s fine clothing and his red Ferrari piqued Chris’s curiosity. Chris was utterly sold to this gentleman’s profession and he applied for an internship program to work at an E.F. Hutton, a stockbroker firm.

The program took 25 interns out of which only 1 would be selected. As can be seen, the chances of him getting hired were very slim. But Chris did not have the luxury of having second thoughts. Chris eventually quit his sales venture and dedicated full time to the internship and so started his days of hustle.

It wasn't an easy journey for Chris. One week into his internship, his hiring manager was fired. Following a scuffle with his girlfriend, he was arrested and citing his unsettled dues was locked up for 10 days. When he finally got the job, he found it much to his dismay that it was an unpaid one. But Chris kept hustling. He would pull long hours, coming in early and leaving late. He would run the extra mile to rope in customers even during his day-offs.

While he would plunge himself during the day, at night he would spend hours reading the books on the stock market, arranging for his toddler, doing odd jobs in exchange for food. He would set a personal target of calling 200 prospective customers each day and stick to it like chewing gum to hair

All this while he was homeless and would roam from one place to another in search of food and shelter, often sleeping wherever he and his son would find safety- motels, parks, benches, flophouses and even bathrooms. This would happen for over a year unbeknownst to any of his colleagues.

But every cloud has a silver lining. His efforts finally paid off when Chris passed his Series 7 exam in his first attempt itself and became a full-time employee.

But he did not stop there. A few years down the line, Chris established his brokerage firm and things only went upwards from thereafter. Today, he is a respected business tycoon, a motivational speaker, a renowned philanthropist, recipient of a multitude of awards, a warm father, an author and a producer. His net worth stands at an approximated 60 million dollars

And he even has a blockbuster movie on his life, titled “The pursuit of happiness” that received critical acclaim

Quite an inspiring tale, right?

So, coming back to the topic, what kept Chris motivated? What made him pull long hours even at no pay? Why didn't he quit this stockbroking dream as he did with his medical practice?

Well, two things answer these questions:

•Degree of need:

It all boils down to how desperately do you want something?

When he started his career in medicine, Chris had a lofty ambition but his desire to be a doctor wasn't as deep as was his desire to earn money. Hence he gave up his dream. But when he took up a position in stockbroking, money was not a desire anymore, it was a necessity - a panacea that could ensure his and his son’s survival. Hence even when he wasn't being rewarded, he kept hustling.

The same analogy is true for us. The dedication of our efforts is a reflection of how immense our need is. If you feel like quitting, reflect on the reason why you started it. If it is worthy enough, you will find your momentum. Else, maybe you will realize that your need was more superficial than intimate

•Negative emotion:

Nothing shapes your behaviour as deeply as negative emotions do.

For Chris, quitting his unpaid job at the firm would only lead him towards more hardships. Hence even when unpaid, he worked like a maniac and clung to his job in the hope of a better tomorrow.

Negative emotions are taboo to be talked but they are the driving factor that shapes our behaviour. Negative emotion is the reason why you can complete the entire syllabus in a night, before the day of the exam but find it so hard to repeat the same when you have an entire semester to prepare for it.

In the carrot and stick method, the carrot might tempt you but it is the stick that makes the work done. Hence next time when you feel low, just ask yourself what do you stand to lose for not trying hard enough this time. Maybe it could answer your dilemma.

High ambitions drive your inspiration, they elevate your dignity in your own eyes, they charge you with positive energy.

At the start of an academic year, you would have vowed to yourself to be more disciplined, more involved and even improve your scratchy attendance.

At the start of a new year, you would have taken some solid resolutions to be a more productive person, a healthy individual or improve your hygiene.

At the start of your new job, you would have committed to being sincere and interactive.

But just a few weeks or months into the studies or work, you start being lousy or keep losing interest either giving up or providing half-hearted participation. You would reason it was because this time around, the course was way too hard or maybe way too easy hence you lost your attendance. You would reason that being productive was mentally or physically taxing you and you saw no improvement and hence you decided to take a break. You would reason that the new job is not as exciting as the previous one and hence you see no point in being so committed

Well, none of these is pointless arguments, they might even hold some merit. But these are just superficial reasons that you would cite to justify your demotivation. The true reason is simple, your ambition to ace the semester, improve your life or make a solid impression in office were lofty ambitions. They were not dire needs, you don't stand to lose much by bunking a few classes, having a few cheat days or taking it easy at work. There aren't any dire consequences or "negative emotions" if you don't want to hustle your way out.

And hence you subconsciously choose to take the easier route.

When Chris Gardner was going through the rough patch, he didn't rely on external motivation to burgeon out of his woes, but that doesn't necessarily mean that you should do the same. When you feel demotivated, take help- either read your favourite quotes, go through a YouTube feed, watch an inspirational movie or listen to a motivational speaker.

Make use of whatever measure that helps you but be reminded it's always how desperately you want it and what you stand to lose when you don't achieve that drives you rather than lofty goals. I know, this train of thought is hard to digest but it is what it is!