love
All you need is Love, and Love is all you need.
Back of my heart
It’s been almost 13 years since the night we met. And I still remember it like it was yesterday. A chance meeting. A friend of a friend led me there. I almost didn’t go but got pushed by two friends there. I had recently broken up with someone who had kept me locked away for almost three years. I hadn’t been to a party in so long but I went. Walking into the party I was nervous and questioning why I even went and then I saw you. Like something from a fairytale or rom-com, a “meet cute” as they call it. From across the room our eyes met, I pointed you out to my friend and she dragged me over to you. From that moment we spent the rest of the party drinking and laughing. At its end my two friends, your two roommates and us went back to your house. We drank more and as they played guitar hero we made our upstairs, to your room. You picked me up against the wall and kissed me, your nose and lips ran up my neck and you told my my perfume drove you crazy. You told me I was beautiful. We spent hours in your room. You undressed me and yourself. We laid in your bed laughing, talking and kissing. You said you wouldn’t sleep with me that night because I wasn’t that type of girl. To prove to me that you respected me. You made me laugh, you made me feel happy and loved from the moment you spoke to me, touched me, kissed me. I remember leaving after the sun was up, giggling with my friends about you and how amazing I felt. How I couldn’t believe the way I felt. Then you broke me. The whirlwind of a romance didn’t last long. You told me you wanted to take me on your trip home to Alaska to meet your parents, to see where you grew up. I hesitated. And maybe that hesitation sparked what happened next. Not long after you got back I started seeing you less, you started lying. And then that same friend of a friend who brought us together told me you were “hooking up”, as she put it, with someone else. A someone else I knew. And I was crushed. My heart wasn’t just broken, it was shattered. I couldn’t believe it. You were the man I had always dreamed of. I thought this was it. This was perfect. But to you, I guess, I was just another girl, just another notch, soon to be a distant memory. You were in the Navy and soon after assigned to a different base out of state. You contacted me not long after leaving, you said that you were sorry, that you thought what you did would make it easier for me once you left. That hurting me, having me hate you would make it easier for me to let go. But you were wrong, it hurt worse. So much worse. And it didn’t change how I felt about you. I barely got to be with you and yet I still fell in love with you. A love I’ve never been able to let go of. A pain I’ve never been able to let go of. Over the years we talked periodically. After you I feel into a relationship with someone else, a someone else who lied to me, hurt me, manipulated me and tormented me. You blamed yourself, you told me it was your fault I was with him, if you hadn’t left me I wouldn’t have been with him, I would be with you. You got stationed in Italy and asked me to come see you. And I hesitated, again. Then you got married. You had two kids, a boy and a girl. I got in and out of abusive relationships with other people and myself. I fell into a drug addiction that tore my life apart. Then I got sober, I had two kids, two girls. But still in an abusive relationship. Still not happy. And I still think of that night, of you. How it made me feel, how it still makes me feel. How things could’ve been different if I hadn’t hesitated. If I’d let go of my past and gone to Alaska. If I’d let go of my pain, trusted you and gone to Italy. If things would’ve been different, if we’d still be together. Or maybe we were just destined to be a heart break. A distant memory of young love that died before it ever truly began. A dream of a life over written by reality. Whatever it was or could’ve been will always live in my heart. I don’t know if that love or pain will ever go away. I just know that after 13 years it’s still there. That first night is still there. A dream of a future where we meet again and get another chance is still there. And I wonder if I’m still there in your heart. If you ever think of me and what could’ve been. Maybe what could still be. DLG, named after your father. The Irish middle name I used to tease you about when you would make fun of my goofy laugh, the laugh you loved. Memories tucked away in my soul. Memories and a love I will never let go.
By Sam Slater5 years ago in Humans
Body Image, Hormones, and Spinning Out of Control.
In the 9th grade I worked in the office at the school, and it was my job to go around and pick up all the slips in each classroom that showed who was absent. There was one class in particular that I hated going into, because every time I opened the door the guys in the back row would hoot and holler and call me "sex". My face would grow warm and turn red, and I would practically crush my hand in the door trying to scoot away as quickly as possible. In other rooms, guys would whistle or make rude comments about me.
By Denise Willis5 years ago in Humans
Changing Lights
They say you should just rip the Band-Aid off. Gradually peeling it away each fraction of an inch is more painful. Perhaps. Of course, you could always just leave the Band-Aid on and hope that the glue will naturally dissolve, freeing you from the need to make any decision. Sometimes there's no choice and the Band-Aid is ripped away for you. You'll either discover you healed or you'll bleed all over the place.
By Dena Doval5 years ago in Humans
Lost
I stood at the top of the hill, watching the sun rise over the trees. I had to come here every day to remember who I was. To start the day with an understanding of how I was going get through the day without losing myself. I was exceptionally good at losing myself. Truthfully, I just gave myself away every day. I know I have the power to change that yet, here I am again feeling the same way as yesterday. And today, like very day, I promise myself that I will not allow others to deplete me; that I will do what best serves my soul; and I will emerge at the end of the day, as the me I feel here in this moment.
By Rosemary McManus Coleman5 years ago in Humans
Where do I stand?
Lately I’ve been arguing with myself. Going back and forth on what is reasonable and why I feel certain things. I’ve debated, made lists, weighed out the pros and cons. Questioned what I wanted and whether or not my gut feeling was correct. Spoke to my best friend, the only friend who could possibly understand, because like me, she goes through her days wondering the same thing- “Where do I stand?”
By Anna Cecilia5 years ago in Humans
Everyone Wants To Be Loved:
Everyone wants to be loved. No one should have to go through life alone. People ask me all the time why I am so kind. Truth is I have seen my share of sorrow. Years ago when I was in my late twenties I worked an overnight shift job at a bank. An older woman was very nice, very hard worker, and she was alone. She had no friends, no one to talk to except the people she worked with. One night me and my coworkers had a conversation about how we did not like when people would ring our bell, and try to sell us something. This woman said, "I love when people come to my door, because it is someone to talk to." The lady told us that every day sh came home to an empty house. This is the reason she loved to come to work every night.
By Cheryl A Nocera 5 years ago in Humans
Tomorn - "More at tomorrow."
Her tired green eyes flitted over the weekly ledger. Each jolt of the train causing Sara to lose her focus on the screen. It had been yet another week of early starts and long, busy days. Although constantly worried about her coffee shop’s never ending financial woes, Sara felt a real sense of pride and accomplishment. It had been eight months since she had bought the business from her ailing friend, Trinity. Poor Trinity had been even more succumbed to M.S. when Sara had last visited her. Yet whenever the conversation turned to the store, Trinity’s inner spark lit up, giving Sara the drive to keep it all together.
By Josie Morris5 years ago in Humans
Hey There Delilah
Hey There Delilah Hey there Delilah. What’s it like in New York City? Must be exciting to move; I remember it was for me. We’re a thousand miles apart now, but you’re still the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. That photo you sent me just arrived, of you in the white dress, and honestly, baby, not even Times Square could shine as bright as you do. I often sit outside the apartment on the steps, playing my guitar and thinking of you.
By Sean Lyall5 years ago in Humans
