The Black Box
A spooky Micro
There was only one rule: don’t open the door. You could scream, weep, wet your pants, as long as you didn’t open the door.
“How can it be that hard?” Matthew had asked.
Jaime had laughed, eyes wide with imagined horrors, and bitten into her candyfloss. “Well nobody knows what happens in there, but nobody’s won the prize yet!”
“Dad, you freaked out when you got locked in the toilet.” Ella loved bringing that up. “I don’t reckon it’s for you.”
Which was why he was now stood in the middle of a black curtained cube, shivering in his boxer shorts. He had taken the blindfold off after the prescribed twenty seconds, and now he wasn’t even sure where the door WAS.
Outside, he could hear the hubbub of the fair, and nearer, Ella’s voice. “….bet he wimps out…”, then Jaime’s “…home for dinner….”, then nearer still, a hiss. Matthew looked towards the sound and saw a sallow vapour seeping from beneath the curtain, creeping across the wet concrete floor. Was that a stain? He bent to look closer, and the lights went out.
It took a second to realise the sound had gone too. Matthew stood for a moment listening to his heartbeat, the scuff of something nearby, a flutter at the curtains, and… a second heartbeat? And then the screaming started. From every side, beyond his walls, the screams tore across the air, cut off in guttural gasps.
Then Ella’s voice, almost beside him. “Let me in! Dad, let me in.” Jaime’s too, and a hammering. Matthew lunged for a curtain, groping his way towards the noise, touching softness, wetness, unaccountable warmth and finally, a handle. “Dad! Please!”, “Ella, RUN!”, and a scream, two screams, and again, was that a second heartbeat, beneath his, in the sudden silence?
About the Creator
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The story invoked strong personal emotions
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Comments (44)
Was it an escape room? and something went wrong? my pulse is up anyway!
A well-wrought, random scene of terror!
Gave me chills! You can really feel the fear and confusion in that room.
I like how the intensity ratchets up as soon as he’s inside the box. The stuff of fairground nightmares indeed!
Very fun, great job. Congratulations on TS.
Back to say congratulations, Hannah, on placing second for Most Popular Story on this week's leaderboard with this amazing piece.
Yay Hannah!!! Congrats on second place for most popular story this week!! 🎉
Nice work! Congrats on TS!!!
Good work!
Fabulous story by Hannah Moore, congratulations on the top story
Congrats on top story!! 💌🥳🎉🥳🎉🥳
This is a truly frightening bit of micro fiction - and a great entry for the given prompt. Well done. Congratulation, too, on Top Story recognition!
Oh!!! This was sooooo good Hannah!!! Creepy, mysterious and well thought out!! Love it!!
Just circling back to say congrats on Top Story, Hannah!
What a fab top story - this was brill Hannah.
Congratulations on TS!
Great entry! Had me invested the whole time
Not surprised to see this on the front page at all. Congrats Hannah on a bloody great Top Story!
Wow that was a frightening ending. Great entry
Yikes! I'm with the dad in this story. You brought us right into the box with the hissing and screaming. Very well-told.
Very creepy, Hannah, great job! Congrats on getting top story for this one!
This is written beautifully! Nice job!
Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Great suspenseful story, Hannah!
Congratulations on Top Story. Happy to subscribe to your work. Suspenseful.