Movies of the 80s: Top Critic Insults Aimed at 'Xanadu'

If you grew up as a Gen-X-er living through the 1980s then you remember Xanadu as that soundtrack record everyone's older sister loved. The movie was there too, I guess, but it was the soundtrack on every turn table that was the lasting legacy of Xanadu. The music by star Olivia Newton John, burnished by the slick production of producer Jeff Lynne and his band, The Electric Light Orchestra, proved to be the one thing people kind of liked about Xanadu.

Even star Gene Kelly knew the score. He reportedly told director Robert Greenwald that the movie was merely a commercial for the soundtrack. Kelly was 67 years old when he co-starred in Xanadu and had no time for pretense, he openly stated that he took the role 'because it was easy.' He was promised he wouldn't have to dance in the picture and then ended up doing a number with Olivia Newton John and wound up on roller skates in the big final number. At least he seemed to have a good time.

Critics? Not so much. Below is a selection of the more scathing takes on the $20 plus million dollar commercial for a movie soundtrack, Xanadu.

1A. In a scathing example of reviews at the time of the release of Xanadu, critic John Stark wrote of Xanadu “Xanadu… is a film that… no I won’t say it, this is a family newspaper and my mother is a subscriber. I will say that the film does what Linda Lovelace also did, and let it go at that.” Stark continued saying “Trust me, there has never been a more grotesque and strident musical ever made. I saw it last night and I am still in shock.”

2. Michael Maza was slightly more kind in his review of Xanadu stating “With its heavy beat, flashy special effects, its riotous color, and script that bends time and space, Xanadu is both enveloping and exhausting. At 88 minutes, it’s also blessedly short.”

3. Critic Donna Chernin took things back in a meaner direction in her pan in the Cleveland Plain Dealer opening her review “Your dreams are supposed to come true in Xanadu, a new musical starring Olivia Newton John and Gene Kelly. After a few minutes my dream was for a swift end to this atrocity, but my wish wasn’t granted for some 80 insufferable minutes”

4. Critic Bernard Drew on Xanadu in The Reporter Dispatch “It was directed by Robert Greenwald who substitutes for magic, an elfin whimsicality upon which Xanadu ultimately chokes”

5. “Xanadu ranks up there among the worst musicals of all time.” Diane Wright The Daily Herald

6. “So much for good intentions. The net effect of this something-for-everyone approach is a camel of a musical: A Slow and often bumpy ride.” Jim Wright The Record August 11th, 1980.

7. “So they’ve tried to make a lyrical 80s musical with some serious overtones but the view is too constricted and the approach so pedestrian they’ve just created a travesty. And a boring one.” Tom McElfresh Cincinnati Enquirer August 11th, 1980.

8. “There was every reason to believe that Xanadu would prove to be a Xana-don’t.” Kevin Thomas Los Angeles Times August 11th, 1980.

9. “It’s plot is like One Touch of Venus done on the level of a Dr. Pepper commercial.” Joe Baltake Philadelphia Daily News August 11th, 1980

10. “We think of Gene Kelly wobbling along on those roller skates, and Olivia Newton John bleating her heart out and the sad side of nostalgia wells up. Ah to see a really great musical… maybe Singing in the Rain is on the Late Show this week.” Joanna Connors The Minneapoiis Star.

Bonus Positive Review! Even the positive reviews of Xanadu were a little mean: “Common sense has little to do with the sort of experience Xanadu is after, so perhaps that is why all the ungainly and inept things pass, leaving a blurred but beautiful echo in their path.” Lyle Slack The Hamilton Spectator

All quotes sourced via Newspapers.com

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