Marina

As she was going on her nightly run, Marina, miscalculated her step and ate shit. She tumbled for quite a bit until she reoriented her body and sat upright. She was covered in mud. Her nightly run that usually ended with a winner's high was cut short and now she was sure she was sitting in duck poop. “FUCKING HELL! ,” she exclaimed. As she tilted her head up she knew that despite her fall, she was lucky. The light of the full moon had the canal glowing, she could see little black fish glimmering as they swam together in creepy synchrony. There was a light warm breeze that, wavered her hair like a flag. Despite the fall, she was ok. She stood up and started limping towards the dirt path. Don’t cry, she thought, Chef Ramsey would be disappointed. She knew she had been binging his cooking show for so long, that now, Chef Gordon Ramsey was a part of her. A motivating force, you could say.

She admired how strong he was. The blonde strands of his hair resembled very closely the vegetation that the native ducks had used to create their nests. She saw him in everything that she did, everyone that she met, the air itself whispered Chef Gordon Ramsey. OH, how she wanted to be Chef Ramsey. She knew she was great, just like him. By now she had started trotting again on the dirt path next to the canal. She continued to jog, her heartbeat thumping” Crème brûlée,crème brûlée, crème brûlée ”. She decided to start looking down every once in a while, as she did not want to fall again. Only losers adhere to gravity, she thought. She looked down and on her gaze to look back up she saw a raccoon in the middle of the trail. It was holding an egg. Marina stopped. She didn’t want to get too close, raccoons carry rabies. Its weird evil little hand was caressing the egg. She felt fear. “What would Chef Ramsey do?”, she mumbled. She jumped and yelled out,”aaaahhh!” in an effort to scare away the raccoon. It worked. The raccoon scurried away into the darkness, leaving the egg behind.

Elated by her small victory, Marina shrieked and closed her hands into fists. She knew that little accomplishments add up. She picked up the egg. It was still warm. She figured the raccoon had stolen it from one of the duck nests, but It was dark and she was tired. So she resolved to bring the egg back in the morning. She decided to walk instead of run, for now, she had a precious life in her hands. She didn’t want to risk it. As Marina walked, she could not shake the feeling she was being watched. A flutter here a flutter there something was around her. All she knew was that whatever it was, was malevolent. She walked faster.

As she entered her apartment the first thing she did was lock the door behind her. Then she found a flashlight, turned off the lights, and shot the egg with a beam of light. It was see-through, all red and veiny. As she spun it in her hand slowly she could see that there was a little being in there. A little chubby mass in the egg that she knew in her heart she needed to protect. “What would Chef Ramsey do?” she thought. She jumped up and grabbed a little blanket. Chef Ramsey would be quick and efficient. She wrapped the blanket around the little egg and put in directly underneath a table lamp. Eggs need heat, she thought.

Content with herself, she started the process of her bedtime ritual. She washed her face, brushed her teeth, and put on all kinds of moisturizers. Marina put on her pajamas and went through the apartment turning off all of the lights. As she was turning off the last light, a small pebble hit her window. Perplexed, Marina tiptoed toward the window. And then SMACK! again another pebble hit the window. She almost had a heart attack. Chef Ramsey does not feel fear, she remembered. So she opened her window and stuck her head out.

She should not have done this, as a giant white barn owl flew by and grabbed her by the hair. The bird tried to pull her out the window. It failed and Marina fell onto the carpet floor of her apartment. She was not quick enough. The owl made its way in through the window. It stopped one foot away from her. All of the lights in her apartment were off( except for the table lamp heating the egg). The light coming in was the moonlight through the window and it illuminated the owl as if it were made of diamonds. This is no ordinary bird, Marina thought.

The bird's head spun and Marina knew what it wanted…the egg. The owl hooted. Marina slowly dragged her body backward pleading with the owl telepathically to leave her alone. She decided to use her words,“Owl I have the egg.I need to grab it”. It looked as though the owl understood. Jesus, she thought, why is this bird so damn angry, it’s not like I burnt its Beef Wellington. She went into the other room and turned on all of the lights. She grabbed the egg and presented it to the bird while bowing as you would to a king.

The bird grabbed the egg and moved back. Marina looked into its eyes and heard a voice. A voice as clear as day said,” Thank you, you now have one wish. What will it be?”. Without skipping a beat Marina said, “ I want to meet Chef Gordon Ramsey!”. Marina blinked and before her eyes was Chef Gordon Ramsey. He was looking intently at her. Marina got all flustered and made her best effort to say something, but she couldn’t. She could only cluck.