Continuously asking about one's partner's feelings during sexual is actually a sign of lack of confidence.

Dani and her husband met through an introduction and got married a year later. Like any ordinary couple, their relationship was neither particularly passionate nor especially bad, and their life moved at a steady pace. However, when it came to sex, Dani had always harbored a small complaint. Although their sex life was relatively normal, she rarely experienced pleasure.



It wasn't until one night when they were lying in bed, whispering to each other, that she finally spoke up: "Every time we have sex, you always ask me if I've had an orgasm and how it feels. I'm just enjoying the moment, and then your question ruins it completely. It really takes away from the experience."



What seemed like a casual comment to Dani triggered an intense reaction from her husband. He abruptly jumped out of bed, stood there barefoot, his face turning from red to white and then back to red again. After a long pause, he finally managed to say, "If you think I'm not good enough, then go find another man!" With that, he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.



Dani was stunned by this sudden outburst and couldn't understand why her husband had reacted so strongly.



What she didn't know was that her words had hit a very sensitive spot for him.



Dani's husband had used adult films as his primary source of sexual education since his teenage years. He had always compared himself to the male actors in those films and was particularly struck by the scenes where the female actresses screamed in ecstasy. As a result, he had subconsciously come to believe that loud vocalizations were a sign of pleasure. His first girlfriend had always been very quiet during sex, which was very different from what he had seen in the films. This had led him to worry: Was it because his size wasn't sufficient? Or was it because his skills were lacking?



Carrying these doubts, he married Dani, who was his second girlfriend, but he found that even with Dani, although she sometimes showed emotion during sex, her reactions still didn't match the images in his mind. Being an introverted person, he was too afraid to voice his concerns, fearing that the answers from his wife would be too humiliating. Instead, he secretly researched better techniques online, tried various methods he had seen in adult films, and constantly asked his wife about her feelings during sex. In fact, during those times, his own experience was also negatively affected. He was afraid that he couldn't satisfy his wife, worried that his movements were not gentle or appropriate enough, and even feared that she might mock him for being inadequate. His excessive focus on his own performance naturally diminished his own physical sensations.



Understanding the root of the problem, Dani had already made up her mind. She planned to have a serious talk with her husband. She believed that if he stopped questioning her about her feelings and focused more on his own sensations, their sex life would improve significantly. This, in turn, would greatly enhance their emotional closeness as a couple.