Bad Memes Rising
Sex! Sex!! Sex!!! And added Affirmations for Authors + a Superheroine Appearance!

At this point, my shit needs no introduction, right?
⚡😁👍
I'm __Lightning Bolt. ⚡⚡⚡
I do comedy bits using memes swiped from the Internet (Facebook). People laugh at them. And that's my goal!
If you want to steal any of these steamy things to post them elsewhere, go for it. Use them to Impress Friends & Influence People!
Because the Theme This Time is_Sex!!!
⚡😁👍
Most of this material is raunchy. <==This is your only FOREWARNING.
I'll get better at warning people what to expect in the future. As for now, just be aware, if you

Okay. So here we go!!!
In The Beginning...
#1) Historical Sex Meme- 1

If that ☝️ seems like an inflated percentage... think about it! It was a simpler time!
I'm bisexual!
And I believe!
⚡😁👍
⚡_______________⚡
#2) Historical Sex Refresher

Arousal takes effort.
Some things never change. ☝️
Am I right?
⚡_______________⚡
#3) Historical Sex Moment- 3

It was your mama's mama who inspired the expression: "Westward, Ho!"
🤭
⚡_______________⚡
A quick PUBLIC SERVICE REMINDER...

Not only will it get you drunk (and desensitized to the taste of spunk) really fast! ... each glass provides 7% of your daily recommended protein allowance!
Live Without Regrets!
Enchant Your Tastebuds!
It's like having Magic in your Mouth!
🍾🍷🪄🪄🥂
⚡_______________⚡
#4)- Bringing It Back to the Present...

That☝️ seems a little prejudicial. I don't think we are all that bad.
But hey, wait just a moment, will ya? A video just came across my radar that I really need to watch...
👀👀👀👇

THREE HOURS LATER...
Damn it, I hate it when my computer freezes up like that!
What were we talking about again?
🤷♂️
⚡_______________⚡
#5)- When Horny and Hungry Collide

To Boldly Go Where No Butter Has Gone Before!
It's good to be the Captain.
⚡😁👍
⚡_______________⚡
#6)- A Confession

Actually, truth be told, I'm fearful that if I give up innuendos, my fiancé will give me a tongue-lashing!
Oops! 🤭 I just screwed up!
My commitment was firm, but then it was like I just lost control! I admit my longcomings. 😉 I keep fucking up... up and down, over and over and over! But it just feels so good when they are gushing out of me. 💧💧
And now here I am: soaked in innuendoes! 💧💧💧
<sigh> 😔
Oh well!
Tomorrow is another lay!
⚡_______________⚡
#7) Penis Joke- 1

If you got it, flaunt it! Not every dude has that kind of impressive rock formation!
Now, he be like, "Your turn! Show me your grand canyon, baby!" 😉
Guys are geniuses when it comes to sophisticated flirtation!
😂🤣🤣
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#8) Penis Joke- 2 ✌️

Are all librarians that prudish or is it just the ones that I run into?
Now that I stop to think about it... 🤔
Batgirl/Barbara Gordon was a librarian Back In The Day, right? And she was pretty standoffish.
And all gothy.
Still, she's a superheroine, so she's always good in an emergency, right?
🗣️
"SAVE ME, BATGIRL!"

"You ask 'what's the emergency', Batgirl? Actually, I just wanted you to see this..."

Take this ☝️ home with you to your Bat-cave... and call me if you have an 'emergency' that I can assist you with!
😉
⚡_______________⚡
Oh wait! I promised inspirational shit for writers too, didn't I? Once I get my penis jokes started, I can go all night! 😉
Let me throw in this 👇 before I forget and then get accused in the afterglow of false advertising...
... (again)...

Before you take out your dick, first make certain you've checked these five settings...
- Airplane mode- OFF
- Night light- OFF
- Bedtime mode- OFF (as counterintuitive as that seems).
- NFC - OFF!
- and most important of all = Bluetooth - OFF
I have experience with these things. ⚡😁👍
You're welcome.
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#9) Penis Joke- 3 (going deep)

Clothes make the manhood!
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#10)- OMG!!! WTF?!?!

DON'T!

Wait... maybe I misunderstood that red sign! ☝️ Push all the way into what until the balls release? Hmmm.
🤔
I can't be great without explicit instructions.
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#11)- One for My Lesbian (and bisexual) Friends...

It's good for the environment! 🌎🌍🌏
😉
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#12)- A Second Jest for my Lesbian viewers...

I mean... if you think about it, 🤔 Skeletor could be a woman. Who's to know since 'he' has no flesh?
The possibilities are just so erotic!
Am I right? 🔥
⚡_______________⚡
#13)- One for My Gay (and bisexual) Friends...

BRING ON THE TROJANS!
And don't forget the extra olive oil! (It doesn't have to be virgin.)
😏
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#14)- Not so much another penis joke as A Penis Observation...

Saying shit like that ☝️ (especially all in one breath!) is actually the way I flirt with good-looking guys.
Smooth, right?
⚡😁👍
Daddy knows what he's doing!
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#15)- Another One for My Gay Friends...

Have a get-together, invite only guys, and serve these ☝️ as party favors.
Subtle, right?
🤤🤤⚡
⚡_______________⚡
Here's two more Inspirational Messages for Authors...

It's a hard life, but somebody has gotta do it!
🤷♂️
More Proof...

It's a very hard life, but who else is gonna do it?
Do Literature a Favor: hug (or fuck) an author today... especially if you are seeing this on a Wednesday or Saturday!
🫂
📖📝🖊️📚📗🖋️📖🖊️
Okay, now back to the important shit (SEX!!!)...
⚡_______________⚡
#16)- Here's One for the Sexually 'Independent'...

🔥🔥
Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?
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#17)- Auto-Fellatio Conundrum...

A riddle that hard ☝️ would take me weeks of experimentation to solve!
I guess that's why Batman is considered a 'better' superhero than I am?
In my defense, I don't have a ward named Dick Grayson in my life, so I have no basis for comparison.
🤷♂️
⚡_______________⚡
#18)- Auto-Fellatio for Writers...

Twenty-seven if you count the friends on Facebook who can't unfriend me because they died!
And I've got almost that many subscribers now on Vocal!
⚡😁👍
Envy me, bitches!
⚡_______________⚡
#19)- WARNING! You're not going to like this next one if you've got a g/f.
(My warnings are always a little late. 🤷♂️)

Feel threatened yet, straight dudes?
Daddy is amusing as fuck and sexy as hell! 🔥
⚡_______________⚡
#20)- OMG, Having People Laugh at my Memes Gets Me Sooooo HOT!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

When this truck pulls up... consider it your Two Second Warning!!!
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
⚡_______________⚡
#21)- OH MY GOD! Holy FUCK!!!!

I'm drenched.
Again. (That's twice since we started this post!)
😋
Was this as good for you as it was for me? 😏 If so, hit that ❤️ button.
And if it wasn't that good for you... Hey! Tell me something I haven't heard before!
🤷♂️
😏
Thank you so much for your readership.
Please tip me $27,115.00.
⚡😁👍
💤💤
I'm sleepy now...........
😴💤💤💤💤
💤💤💤💤💤💤
______________Bolt ⚡

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Comments (12)
😂😂😂😂This is a quality harious story of jokes on sex
Another quality selection!
Hilarious! For some reason that video wouldn't load! 😜 Great stuff!!
This was hilarious!
lol
This is hilarious Bill. Love it.
Great fun
OK those memes well some were hilarious as hell, matter of fact, I am still laughing out loud on three of them. Matter of fact I borrowed the same three, never know where they will show up, lol.
Bad!
Oh darling, I love it! I’ve missed you (or rather, I’ve missed me! You’ve been right here!) Keep up the bad, bad work! 😈 Much Love, Your westward hoe!
I literally laughed out loud for memes number 2, 8 and 16 🤣
This series has me rolling! The wagon joke and the Batman were my favorites!