πππ πΈπππππππππ
A Cataclysmic Catalyst!
Plagued with allergies from birth, Edwin Marx tiptoed through life adhering to a long list of restrictions. The only food suitable for consumption was bread and a few green vegetables.
Relying on supplements and specially formulated impossible burgers, his taste buds would never know the addictive pleasures of flavor...
It was in the first year of college that things began to get quite interesting for our hero...
*
Confronted with a keg of beer, (a staple for the cheering brood of adrenaline junkies) peer pressure was about to send him on a life-changing highβ¦
"No way man! I've never drank before. I have no idea what itβll do!"
"C'mon, wuss! You said you can eat bread. What do you think beer is? It's liquid bread! Basically the same ingredients!"
Somehow, the logic worked. He took the twenty-ounce mug to his head, guzzled it all and joined in on the raucous celebration sealing his camaraderie...
Little did anyone know, the alcohol began reacting strangely with his endocrine system, carving out muscles and causing the overproduction of intoxicating pheromones. Visible to the naked eye, these large specks of vaporous, piss-yellow chemicals stretched out a hundred feet. It's as if they were caught in his gravity and he was the nucleus of a holographic dome.
At first, students inhaled the specks by accident until they realized it gave them the appreciated effects of drinking. They could catch a buzz by inhaling his Pheromones! The more Edwin drank, the more he produced. This discovery rocked campuses everywhere! Edwin was soon sought after to attend every frat party possible, saving broke students tons of cash.
Although the national G.P.A suffered, Edwin went on to fully develop his superpower, assisting anyone's need to be irresponsible. Thus, The Inebriator, was born!
About the Creator
Lamar Wiggins
Creative writer in the Northeast US who loves the paranormal, mystery, true crime, horror, humor, fantasy and poetry.
"Life is Love Experienced" -LW
LDubs
Keep reading
More stories from Lamar Wiggins and writers in Fiction and other communities.
The steps to losing a child
Step One: Lose a child. Not what anyone wants to happen and nothing you can do to change it, but you can go through steps to becoming happy again. You can go through steps to loving again. You can go through steps to become a new you because after losing a child you will never be the same person you once were.
By Tabitha Hinkley3 days ago in Fiction
Comments (24)
Love how this went all the way across the country- βAlthough the national G.P.A sufferedβπ He would be very popular at parties!
Ps congratulation on the leaderboard placement
Man I love this line as a the scientific reasoning β endocrine system, carving out muscles and causing the overproduction of intoxicating pheromones.β You actually gave a fundamental reason why, too funny.
Humorously penned and loved your super hero story!!! Congratulations on the Leaderboard Honorable Mentions!!!β€οΈβ€οΈπ
Hey Lamar!!! Congrats on Honourable mention for most discussed story!! π
Congratulations on the Honorable Mention for the "Most Discussed Stories" this week on the leaderboard. Well done!
Clever and funny, Lamar! Very unique origin story!
So uber creative & amusing! π€©So well done!
Oh man I laughed so much Lamar. This is my kind of hero πππ. I also got a huge laugh from poor Edwin not knowing the pleasures of flavor. Made me think of the stereotypical white dude cooking chicken without seasoning ππππ
Haha, I love this, Lamar! "They could catch a buzz by inhaling his Pheromones"...this is such a fun and creative concept for the challenge! π€
Hahaha! I love this idea and you turned it into such a fun story! Great job, Lamar!
Liquid beer... I might need to steal that next time my husband asks what I'm doing and I'm pouring a beer. "Oh nothing, just making a sandwich!!" π€£ Honestly though, this was great! Love the creativity behind a very inebriating super power! π€£
Hahahahahahahaha this was hilarious! I wish Edwin would be able to produce food and drinks as well hehehe. Loved your story!
Thank you for the laughs - that was truly awesome!
The inebriator, hilarious.
Probably the most desired "speaker" on any campus. Great story, Lamar!
I bet he turns up at war zones next making both sides too drunk to fight causing world peace. Great job, Lamar!
I love that every entry to this challenge is silly! Loved this, Lamar! Reminded me of the beer drinking super dog in Strange Brew!
Haha. That is so creative, and ridiculous. Love it!
Too funny! Cheers
Genius. And, yes, beer is liquid bread. That makes it a staple.
That is a brilliant superpower ππ
Super cool and fun, well done!
this gave me a laugh lol great work friend.