jollof

It shouldn't have been so suspicious in retrospect,

But the food I brought to school always had someone saying

'what the heck?'

My parents never thought twice about it,

And realistically why should they have?

Our culture should be respected,

But ultimately it isn't.

Brown paper bag of my country's food,

And kids are laughing because they can't understand.

Bag in my hand and shame in my heart.

Suspicious brown bag,

And the kids joke about farts.

My crush on the playground,

But she’s really like everyone else.

Unsmart and quick to judge.

I push her out my brain

Because anyone to love would never make fun of where I come from.

I stick with the native Asian kids,

For they understand the trite and bullying.

They understand not being respected,

Just as I do.

Met this cool guy named Blue,

Who everyone seemed to enjoy.

He had a plastic bag that he would bring,

And we would sit together and talk about our traumatic families.

Would you believe me if I said I developed a crush?

Such a strange world,

When you can get made fun of for being different?

I do wonder when this came about.

When did it become so common

For apathy to dominate the atmosphere?

It shouldn’t have been the problem that it was.

It was honestly quite ridiculous,

But how am I to respond as a child in the system?

I knew it wasn’t right

But it did not seem like my fight.

Jollof and rice,

Often made by my mother

And easily my favorite.

I know the bunny chow was intriguing to them.

Some were respectful,

While most were not.

It doesn’t hurt my feelings anymore

But it does make me stop to think

About all the little boys and girls

Who come from the continent I was raised

And have to endure what I endured and more.

I had heard stories

Of children taking their lives

All because of their identity at birth

And so much more than this.

But at the same time,

It was ultimately insignificant

In the grand scheme of it all.

Fall would come and I would feel so strange.

It wasn’t until after I graduated

That it started making sense.

I knew not to take those things personally.

I knew to love them as family because that’s what they were;

Even if they chose to ignore it.

My grandmother used to tell me all the time,

“You’re a culmination of the patterns you repeat.”

No matter how cruel the black americans can be,

I know that I am as kind as I can be

And I have a heart full of gold.

Or

At least that’s what my grandmother programmed into my brain.

A lot of americans love to hate talking about race.

They get so angry and riled up,

When there’s really only one race.

I know I know!

Very cheesy and problematic,

And there’s so much nuance surrounding race.

But hear me out.

We all exist on the same planet,

And the biggest things separating us physically

Are oceans and man-made fences;

And mountains.

I am a very peaceful Nigerian.

But I will fight if I need to.

Do not underestimate me for my patience.

If no one else has told you to today,

I want you to go to a mirror of some sort

And remind yourself how amazing you can be.

And then be that.

Shine your light.

Frick what anybody has to say about it.

And if you don’t have anywhere to stay

For the holidays,

You are more than welcome to stay with us.

Hope you enjoy the food!