Family
You Loved a Tempest
You weren’t always there for me you know. You were there but you just weren’t there. I was your oldest, the one who made you a mom. I was the start of fulfilling your dream of being a mother of four. But just because you wanted it, didn’t mean you were always good at it. It was always clear that I was my father’s child. Emotional and volatile, given to outbursts of anger. He was still developing as a human and you had no backbone.
By Paige Franklin4 years ago in Confessions
Show up, be present, and say "I Love You"
Confession to Mom: Promise to Grandma What now seems like so many years ago, just shows actually time flies. Those days we rarely believe things would be how they were at times. I was learning to be an adult and enjoying what life gave me. Grandma just moved in her apartment around the late 90's. Mom, you know grandma always let us know her issues. She trusted and believe in me because I took time to listen to her. Grandma depended on me in many ways as you know. Honestly, grandma was lonely in her cute little apartment. Her sick days was lonely, you know I always dropped everything to attend to her regardless. Being set in her ways, and routine, sometimes she just wanted someone there. I couldn't ask to have those times with grandma taken from me. Yes, she would drive me crazy just like she did you and your sister.
By Della Lonaker4 years ago in Confessions
Dear Mom,
Hey ma, guess what I just smoked the fattest pinner joint and my aura and atmosphere feels like rainbows and unicorns. Such a blessing. I'm safe and comfy at my roommate's house, I pray to the higher power that my smooth transition to my permanent new home is the best I have ever experienced. I hope I never have to leave the house where I reside. I love it here, especially when I am alone and at peace even if I got a sweet buzz. It is heaven on earth. I cannot stand to think about being homeless that one way again, it will land me in lockup or dead and I cannot have that happen to me. I love being a success story, not a dead door nail, or locked up or getting the death penalty because a slum lord did me wrong and more than once. Slum lords, hate them big time. I hope the higher power will forgive me for feeling that way towards slum lords. It hurts to not be in permanent housing for life. It hurts very bad. It is the worst being homeless with no one to help me and keep me safe and off the street as much as I need. I feel like unicorns and rainbows with guardian angels all around me thus far. I get irritated and depressed but today is a very good day. I wish I was not feeling stressed earlier today, but at least now I feel better. I had a bad dream, so horrible I accidentally sharted on my bed, get it, a fart mixed with the gross stuff, ew. Ma, I just accidentally sliced my finger with blade cutting open a pack of bacon. Gotta do my job and stay busy as an author to get the shit off of my brain therefore it stops bothering me with the flashbacks. When I experience any type of trauma I get shell shocked by flashbacks. I hate it so fucking much hot damn it. I just washed my hands and applied a new band aid. I am so poor ma I just wish I would let myself come up. I hate being without money. I hate being broke it is doing something to my spirit. Penniless and need more hygiene items. I hate being so poor. I want to make five thousand stories within a couple weeks or so, or more than six thousand stories just to see how it makes my wallet better so I can have a sweet situation financially. I hope to structure and create some novels for vocal+ for real in the near future. If you believe in God ma please pray for me and anyone in the family who has a prayer closet please ask them to pray to the higher power as well therefore my situation will become brighter. I see a bright ass light at the end of the tunnel even though I do feel depressed and lonely and all alone I still see something great in my future and it is self made financial empowerment. I have been penniless for a long time mom because I have been so scared to hold anything because someone robbed me at gun point back in the day. I love this house that I live at and I hope one day it will be my house and that my work via vocal+ will so get my house bills paid and that would be possible if my roommate were to write a will and get legal people to help insure that I can get this house in my name off of a will being wrote out. I want to live comfortably permanently, I feel like I deserve it and I hope the higher power just makes it be and so be it. Hopefully our higher power will grant us the best that we need.
By Angelina F. Thomas4 years ago in Confessions
Birth of a Phoenix
Dear Mom, I never got a chance to tell you something before you passed away. Even writing this now, it is hard to say. I wrote much more of this letter before I came back up to this part to add my confession. Mom, I am a lesbian. I suppose I could have told you when you were in a vegetative state all those years but I found that hard to do without being able to see your reaction. Before you were in a vegetative state, I did not yet know this confession about myself. I was eighteen years old when it finally clicked. It happened while I was reading a reading assignment in a college class during a summer program away from home. The reading described characteristics of a homosexual within it. My very first emotion was my brain flooding with extreme fear. I did not want to be this way. I was worried that I would get beat up or murdered. I wanted to quit the program and go home to hide from the world. I didn't realize I was exactly where I needed to be. The summer program was known for diversity and acceptance. There were others like me there. I gave it all the strength I could muster and stayed. I think talking to the director about this struggle helped. All students that were going to be entering college in the fall were given a scholarship at the completion of the summer program. I was given one with a title about a phoenix because of my struggle with all this and the phoenix has been an inspiration for me ever since. When I was twenty six years old I got my first tattoo and it was the words Phoenix Rising. I always hoped you would accept me but given the rocky start with the rest of the family, I feel scared to think about what your reaction might have been. Then other times I am betting you knew. They say mothers know these things.
By J.M. Powell4 years ago in Confessions
Better Left Unsaid
I hold the large shoebox full of letters for what feels like the hundredth time. Will this prove to be like all the other times? The box ends up returned undisturbed to the top shelf of the closet. Nineteen years after her death and it still feels like it will be too painful to open and read through the letters. But no, not this time. Not today. Something moves through me this time. This time there is an overpowering purpose behind holding the box. A pull bigger than I have felt before.
By Don Money4 years ago in Confessions
A Mother's Confession
I can say that I do have some stuff that I have kept from my mom that I didn't want her finding out about. Sometimes when I do come clean to tell her, she already knows. At lease most of my secrets. Now I do have some embarrassing secrets that I should come clean to my mom.
By Manda Marie4 years ago in Confessions
I’m not broken
You didn’t break me, Mom. You did what you could in world working against you. When I was born, the knowledge of Autism was so basic, so limited… you simply didn’t know. When I was a kid, they’d say things like “cold parenting causes autism” and find any way to blame you for things we couldn’t change. I can see why you were scared to get that diagnosis and worry what else people might say about us. You didn’t want them jumping to conclusions, not about me, not about you, not about us. You just wanted people to see me for me, not a label, not a diagnosis. You just wanted to help. You know now, in ways it hindered me, perhaps I didn’t get the help I needed early enough. But you also allowed me to be me, you didn’t push me into ABA, you never stopped me from rocking, sucking on my blanket or fixating on the strangest things. You supported me however you could. You let me find myself however I needed to even if it didn’t quite make sense to you.
By Josey Pickering4 years ago in Confessions
My confession
Mom. I never told you this before, but you have always been my hero. I mean you're a real live hero. Yeah, you may not have those superficial powers but you do have those powers that save lives. I am one of the lives you have saved. You have saved me from so many battles I've lost count. The stories I can tell, I will never have enough time to tell them all without taking a lifetime to.
By topgun finiest4 years ago in Confessions
Hey Mom
I always dreamed that one day I would wake up and your pain would be gone. I remember the beginning so clearly. It was always me and you. A real life Lorelai and Rory situation. We were always in the car going places together and singing at the top of our lungs. Shopping together and taking a break to share a root beer and cheesefries with extra ranch. Always laughing and joking.
By Kris Hernandez4 years ago in Confessions
