Nonsensical

I closed my eyes and inhaled. A chill from the wind crept into my bones. How much longer is this going to take? I wondered to myself. You see I was never the person who liked attention. I didn’t want to be the center of the room and I definitely was not comfortable with everyone having their eyes on me. But in a moment like this, there was no getting around it. I knew one day I would have to bare this pain. The feeling of a hundred pairs of eyes staring me down analyzing my every move. With each passing second I could feel their opinions radiating off of them like the heat that radiates off of an open flame. To some people this would be one of the most exciting times a person could ever experience. But to me, it was my punishment.

I looked into the crowd to see if I could spot a face familiar enough to me to help calm me down. I knew my time to speak up was coming and I knew I would need all the encouragement I could manage. I wiped my sweaty palms against my mint green chiffon dress as I forced another inhale into my lungs in my effort to breathe clearly. How is breathing a difficult task for me right now? This is a basic necessity to life and I am struggling with this? I shook my head to try to free myself from the nerves. I could feel the room growing quieter with each passing second. There was a hoot off in the distance, it must be that barn owl I saw when I went out for my walk earlier. It just stared at me, like it was reading me and telling me not to get to close to it. He definitely did not need to worry about that, I had no intentions of getting any closer to him than he had to getting closer to me. I nodded at him and he adjusted his stance. I continued walking and his eyes remained transfixed on me. It felt weird, almost as if he could see what my fellow humans couldn’t pick up on. Or more so what they wouldn’t pick up on. I turned back around to face him again and to stare back at him because I could feel his eyes still on me. It felt like he was judging me, just like them. “WHAT THE –!” I yelled as I noticed this owl that was at least thirty feet away from me, only ten literal seconds ago, was right behind me. I looked up to where he was before and didn’t see an owl there anymore. So I at least knew for sure that this owl standing in front of me was real then. The wind rustled the leaves around me and I took a few steps back trying my best to put some distance between this owl and me. The familiar chill settled into my soul now.

“Look, I don’t know what you want or how you got over here so fast. I don’t even know why you’re staring at me like this but if you want me to leave, I AM. I’m leaving and I am going to give you back this field, this road, you could have this state for all I care. I’m not even from here––” Then I shrieked as the owl flew up towards my face. My butt hit the ground so hard I’m sure that I’ve bruised it and I could feel the pain quickly starting to set in. The owl that was in front of me before seems to have grown to be 6 feet tall. I blinked and gaped in horror. “NO, no no, No, No, no!” I cried as I crawled backwards on the ground towards the field shaking as I went. This can’t be real I thought to myself. “You can’t be real, there’s no way that just happened. You can’t be real” I shook my head no as I felt my face to see if it was warm. “It’s impossible, you can’t be real..” The owl bent towards me and held out one of his wings, “WHO?”

I sat up immediately, gasping for air as I tried to figure out where and when I was. I turned to my right and saw my husband seated beside me. The calming hum of our plane reminding me that we were still on our way to our destination. He grabbed my hand and held it steady, I hadn’t even noticed that I was shaking. “You’re okay, you just had a bad dream. Who were you yelling at? You were trying to crawl back into your seat. I had to tell the flight attendant that it wasn’t anything to be alarmed by and that you just like, did that from time to time.” He laughed as he gave me the snack I missed during my nightmarish dream. “Well one minute we were exchanging our vows again and the nerves of it all got to me. So I thought about a walk that I never took for some random reason and then remembered some silly barn owl I’d never seen. Then he literally grew to your height and he spoke to me and I ha–” Interrupted by the sounds escaping my husband’s mouth I looked over at him. My husband was hysterically laughing at me now and I had to laugh at myself too because it was all so absurd. The flight attendant came back to us with water and said in a southern accent “Honey if I saw a huge owl talking to me I’d crawl back into my seat too!”. I did learn something today though, I DEFINITELY should not have a second glass of wine during my flight, ever again.