Meat My Monster

Happy Halloween

Vocal Halloween Party Playlist

(Feel Free to Read as I have provided a few Musical Treats to Feast Upon. )

1. Wild Dogs

It’s another one of those dark ominous nights as the clouds gather around the Full Moon. And of course the car suddenly stalls out as you silently roll into some strangers’ driveway. You look up at the place and wonder should I ask for help or just call Triple A? The curtains shuffle in the window so you know someone’s home as you begin to dial for help on what appears to be a dead car battery…

Beepbop-booboo-beep-beep “HUH”… OH it figures you're out of range.

So You bravely venture to knock on the door for some assistance. The place looks dilapidated enough and you’re expecting lurch to answer. However, you keep knocking on the door to no avail so you wander to a window and peer in to see if you can determine if there’s anyone actually there or not; once again to no avail.

Meandering past wild vermin that's checking you out, but goes completely unnoticed by you; as you call out…”Hello…Hello…anyone home?”

Making your way back to the door you knock a little harder and toss in a pound for good measure.

The porch dimly lights up with an early Edison amber glow as the door swings open to a clunky halt, with you expecting to meet someone eye to eye, but instead; you are embarrassingly greeted by a pair of firm knockers perched on the chest of the most scrumptious creature you’ve ever laid eyes upon… Scanning upward and over the tall figure, you meet a curt smile and slightly lifted brow of a beautiful face slowly nodding, perceivably with a sarcastic pert.

“YES… How can we help you…? They communicate through the halfway opened door past the dangling chain lock still engaged as you explain the circumstance.

They pause... And then invite you in glowing from cheek to cheek like some extraterrestrial being from planet Mezmer; as you lower your face diaper and continue to explain about the current stranded situation.

Uhhh the creature exclaims with a look of bug-eyed horror as you raise the mask back into place and then a realization of accommodation proceeds from both parties as you enter the rustic smelling, of this truly humble abode.

A feminine singsong voice floats past your ears with tones of Monroe or West in it, but with a definite chill of Manson in the air.

“Take a seat darling you look completely stressed out?”

Obligingly taking a seat in a chair big enough to hold Barkley; it was hard not to wag your feet dangling off the edge like a toddler from some ancient television episode of Laugh-In.

Upon the coffee table stand next to where you’re seated, you behold a beautiful golden antique relic and immediately reach for it as you inquire…

“OH WAIT–PLEASE -DON’T TOUCH THAT BOX” The Beautiful Creature shrieks!

Too late as you try and set it gently back down with a…”whoops.”

“OH Now, you’ve done it. The Vixen Exclaims… “It’s Too Late for us…

It’s too late for us all. Here he comes…” sigh.

2. Hell Raiser

“Allow me to introduce you to Meat. - MEAT -meet Stranger.”

Peering down the dark hallway a Huge Shadow Darker than the dark murk’s its way towards you. You take several squints and agree with yourself… IT’S DEFINITELY DARKER THAN THE DARK?

Until... It Speaks

You watch it slowly moving in and out of the shadowy black velvet darkness, creeping past and through the amber lighting of the foyer like a curtain cutting the fabric of time; then shockingly it reveals an albino white face with hues of toxic pastel green and pale morgue blue.

“HIGH… pleased to Meat you. You do come at a most auspicious moment in time my friend; allow me to express my selves clearly. My Dominants have been unfairly strict upon me the past few years; however this All Hallows Eve, I believe I’ll have a moment to be free from where I have been shackled in the basement left in loneliness to muse upon all my life’s goals and endeavors. However, since you have set me free tonight…

Meat pauses holding out a paw-like hand allowing you to introduce yourself.

“Oh, I’m Townie…” as you look back waiting for this beast of a person to continue.

“Well Toni, I want you to know that I’m very “Good” … at Being Bad.”

Pondering that statement with a brow lifting slightly and frown; one would wonder why anyone would make such an announcement leading to believe if this is, a possible life or death situation as you calculate an option to escape? Then say Naaaaaa as you answer the muse of one's self.

The Dark Shadowy Bulk opens its eyes slowly with those toxic day-glow green, pupils and looks at the beautiful one; batting sweet lashes like a mistreated kitten about to hiss and says...

“Domina’ shall we depart my dearest…?”

The Beautiful Creature exits the room floating elegantly past your pulsing heart leaving you alone with the Dark Shadowy Entity with the curious name of Meat. And you think how very odd, desperately wanting to ask if you can get a cable for a battery jump. But the hulk of a shadow anticipates your need and grants explanation that there’s some sort of electrical anomaly in the vicinity and the only way to escape the blackout beneath the hood would be to push the vehicle a few blocks down the road and maybe it would just start.

“Perhaps we can help you, in some other, ungodly fashion?” it speaks in a deep mono-toned groan.

The drafty room then fills with breathy sounds floating about as you begin to hear distinguished vocal whispering through the faint walls from unknown entities talking about how they’re all going to midnight mass, on Halloween since it lands on ice-scream Sunday this year.

But they’re too embarrassed to bring Meat to see Reverend Smithy after the last family intervention exorcism incident was a fail.

Meat snickers …“What Fools don’t they know I’m an empty vessel and that spirits rise and fall within me, coming and going with haunting irregularity?” uh uh uh uh chuckling

Meat sees you looking faintly peeked, and says…

RELAX- Let us close our eyes and visualize the coming day of the dead my dear fiend.

Yes ssss that’s it… sssSleep… ssss-sleep and Let us Dream of Halloween.

The Dogs Begin to howl like wolves outside.

3. Welcome to my Nightmare

Meat continues to speak…

“Do you see them now, all marching up and down the street begging for sweets and making threats to place their tiny toddler hex upon me?

But tis I who am the trickster and this party is for the parents.

All those Adult Children who need some serious reprimand by none other…

THAN ME!

A deep baritone laugh bellows from the belly of Meat.

4. Frankenstein

“Tawny you’ll have to “forgive me”

For I know that is in “Your” nature. And especially now; for sending you to a very special place that is reserved only for the worst of the worst.

Oh Father high up in the attic please forgive me for what I am about to do.

Domina’- Domina’- hectoria'- introspecto -perfecta – intalecto- filia –filia - nomina intra-venously hocus pocus inconnecto -

So Mote it BE! Amen

5. Going to Hell

Jumping startled from a piercing pinprick feeling sinking into the back of your neck you slap and swat at something crawling across your shoulders into your hair, and then suddenly disappears.

Meat jumps up flipping a wall switch and the room spins into some sort of studio filled with a candy land of musical instruments.

“Allow me to set the mood and the ambiance within my funhouse so that your soul may be perfectly prepared for a night of horrific entertainment as my guest. Oh, and Don’t worry that sticky feeling in your face is just cobwebs… Hmmm... except that one which belongs to Boris my spider.”

DO YOU LIKE MY PIPES?

6. Cantata Fugue in D minor

“As I said My Dominants are very strict until they’re not and when they're naught I can literally get away with murder. Ahh Ha ha ha"

And I want you to know that it is SUCH an honor to share this intimate experience with you this evening Tony.

Here’s a special tune you’ll be singing by the time I’m finished scrambling up your mind with my party punch. So listen closely while my band

“Ghost Yah” and I perform this Lil Ditty.

And Remember no matter what happens this evening you shall always be my guest of honor forever and ever throughout eternity to wander the halls of my superiors' home with me and all my friends when I’m not chained up for misbehaving. Oh excuse me… my Dominants- My Superiors- My Creator and his Mistress- of course I do mean my parents. At least they claim to be my parents but it’s a slightly sordid affair since my father is a Dr of Invention having created me and my so-called mummy who was supposed to be “My Bride” for when I come of age but Daddy did such a masterful job in her creation he ended up taking her for himself. However, please don’t mention that, because my Domina' likes the title Mistress of the “Man”-ner."

Meat slings a guitar overhead and shoulders and announces...

“OK … On with the show and everyone should know my licks are sharp!”

7. Axe Victim

“First things first and that is to make sure we are all properly fed.

And I do hope that you’re all hungry my dear ghastly fiends; so please just gather round the dining table hear in this; my ghoulish dream.

I do admit that I visualize fantastic things that would make anyone’s lower lip puff up and curl in a quiver knowing how I mush I enjoy sharing all my salacious delights with you.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention we use only knives around this place but feel free to dig in with fingernails and get yourself a pound of flesh.

I've heard them say… It tastes like pork?”

8. Summer Cannibals

“OK now close your eyes; turn and face the mural of me on the wall, as we get down deep to business, in making our most Special Halloween Wish.”

Waking up when The Spell is suddenly broken from your slumber vision of being in a hypnotic trance where Meat has seduced you, with his induction methods and help from Boris's love injection upon your lily soft neck.

You’re Like forget about the car out front and you start thinking more like it’s time for you to head for the hills because this place is a complete madhouse cliché of every scary movie you’ve ever nervously endured in life. Knowing that now you slip from the monster's clutches twisting and rolling dodging your way towards the door frantically hoping that one day you’ll once again enjoy the sunlight warming your now cold dead heart… OMG

The Floor mockingly rumbles with a godlike echo as Meat shouts out in a snarky joking tone…

“HEY STOP… WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING? SLOW DOWN… THIS IS ONLY A DRES-S REHEARSAL!

COME OUT - COME OUT- COME OUUUT…

Hmmm well, you may have escaped me for the moment but there is a method to my madness and there is no cliché rhyme or reason to make things any way different.”

9. Good Ones

“Uh Oh I see my Times Up and I hear Daddy Warpath screaming and threatening to take my musical privileges away again…

What Did I do, this time other than breaking all the rules?

It was all for your entertainment pleasure and to secretly bring the vision of my party playlist to a life and now I must rudely kick you all out before I am permanently grounded!

Fly Away Fly Away Scamper back to your hole. Melt, fade or fizzle before the sun comes up to sizzle your drizzle like a dried-up toad.

MEAT CALLS OUT TO HIS DOMINA'

AS THE BEAUTIFUL ONE CASTS THE LAST HALLOWEEN SPELL...

10. Shapeshifting

ALL GOOD THINGS DO COME TO AN END.

So you ran and you ran and you ran some more until you thought you found the door. But my oh my to your surprise when you looked inside the mirror with those television eyes; we all laughed when we saw your surprise and you finally realized that you forgot to make that Halloween wish and now you're captured in my Spider Collection Dish. And because I love you so very very mush and I think I'll name you Squish.

11. Boris the Spider

Warmest Halloween Wishes

Love Frankie

Amazon Prime Music Playlist with Bonus Sound Effects