I Love That Trump is Running Again in 2024

I am so excited right now. I just found out that Donald Trump announced that he’s running for president again in 2024. I’m sure his fanbase of supporters are dancing in their trailer parks as we speak.

I’m dancing, too. After losing the 2020 presidential election by more than 7 million votes, Trump denied the election results were legitimate. He famously preached to his cult-like followers to “Stop the Steal” and told them to “fight like hell” the day of the January 6th insurrection at the Capitol. Of course, he didn’t bother showing up to the event.

But fight they did. Fought to the point of five people dying that day. Hundreds have been prosecuted and are in various stages of going to jail. Speaking of jail, Trump seems to be under the impression that he’ll be a free man by the time we vote two years from now.

That’s a big reach. Trump is facing criminal tax fraud charges in New York, being investigated for the theft of classified documents after leaving the White House, and likely facing future charges for inciting a goddamn insurrection to stop the certification of the 2020 presidential election.

So tonight, he reached out to his supporters, announced his 2024 election, and started immediately exaggerating and lying as he’s always done. We welcome this gesture. Thank you, Donald Trump. You’re going to make this easy once again.

Most people are over the overt racism, bigotry, and ignorance that Trump brings to the table. Besides the MAGA cult, he really has no strong following. Many of the GOP heavy hitters have distanced themselves from Trump in the recent days since the 2022 general election. They are looking toward the future of the Republican Party.

Trump has a history of losing. He lost the last time he ran for president. Not being re-electable after serving four years as president is laughable. He recently supported a number of politicians during this recent mid-term election and most of them lost. It’s almost embarrassing at this stage, his career in politics.

He was a loser prior to wanting to become President of the United States of America. He filed for bankruptcy more times than a businessman of his alleged greatness should ever have to. He’s insulted more people with his racist, bigoted slurs and social media posts than anyone else in recent American history. He’s the shit stain on the Constitution of the United States of America that he freely wipes his ass with.

Let’s not bullshit ourselves. Trump only cares about one thing, and it isn’t making America great again. He cares about Trump. And the personal enrichment of himself and his family.

That’s exactly why he’s announcing his presidential campaign so early. He wants to get a jump start on fundraising. Melania needs a new winter wardrobe. Barron’s size 17 Air Jordans don’t pay for themselves. And these lawyers who are trying to keep him out of prison require top-dollar retainers. These things add up.

Trump’s timing is somewhat questionable, in my mind. After most of the candidates he publically supported crashed and burned in the midterm elections, you’d think he’d pump the brakes, and go back to Mar-a-Lago to lick his wounds while preparing for his next rounds of prosecution.

But that’s not his style. Trump keeps that giant suckhole of a mouth open frequently because that’s what a con man and grifter does. He stays in the public eye. He preys on the weak and ignorant, taking their donations and lapping up every drop of their blind loyalty.

And I’m here for it. Bring it, Drumpf. I have serious doubts that you’ll even be the 2024 Republican candidate for the presidential race. There are better choices, though not by much. Plus you may not even be a free man that’s eligible to run for office in 2024. This remains to be seen, but it sounds like you have a LOT to answer for.

Let’s say you somehow beat the charges you’re facing and assuming the MAGA cult still has your back, what do you really hope to accomplish, Trump? America has proven in these mid-term elections that there is no red wave. It wasn’t even a red trickle. People do not want racist, bigoted shit-suckers like you to represent our country.

Let me say it louder for the garbage humans in the back. Take your White-Nationalist ideologies and shove them up your asses. America is the land of the free and the home of the brave. Not for people like Captain Bone-Spurs and other draft dodgers. We are not going to allow your kind to ruin our nation.

There will be no more stacking of the Supreme Court. Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s body wasn’t even cold yet when you rushed to toss the shittiest Conservative Christian asshole in a robe into the Supreme Court. We do not need irresponsible, ignorant, scummy leadership like you and your cronies that support you.

I’m not jazzed about those who will run against Trump in the primary. Mike Pence is an Evangelical Christian’s wet dream, Ron DeSantis is an epic bigot and cocky prick, and Greg Abbott from Texas is from Texas. Enough said. I kind of hope Trump IS the candidate.

This is assuming he’s a free man in two years and hasn’t had that widow-maker heart attack from all the McDonald’s he’s constantly scarfing down. If he survives to see age 78, he’s doomed to fail. He has a history of losing. He’s an ill-mannered racist, bigoted, asshole. His lack of political experience and human decency showed throughout the entire time of his four-year presidency.

America has seen enough. Trump will never make America great again. The only thing that will make America truly great again is to elect better leadership. And that will have nothing to do with Donald Trump. &:^)