How the Magalizer Grows Seemingly Righteous Pelf

Can we talk? The guy who held the office of President the last time is not as well as he once was. He’s older. Not a lot older, but he is at an age where a year can make a very noticeable difference in abilities. It’s been four years. A lot can happen in just one year. I have no doubt that nearly everyone who reads this will have had the experience of losing an older loved one or friend who went from celebrating one Christmas to missing all the other Christmases to come. That person had no idea that it would be the last Christmas they would ever know. No one knew. Dementia can linger just beneath the surface of awareness for years before it strikes and quickly overwhelms the abilities.

There is a vlog, I suppose that’s the correct word, by a couple of men who are quite knowledgeable about the inner workings of the brain and the fundamentals of mind. In their vlog, which is making the rounds on the internet, they state pretty clearly that the last guy is suffering from dementia and it will not get better. That’s a stark statement. Maybe we need to take a moment and consider the probabilities that will transpire if he is actually suffering from a variety of dementia?

There’s a story about an Emperor of Rome who may very well have had dementia. I think Nero was his name. They say that he fiddled while Rome burned. Or was it that he Truthed while preventing a border bill from passing that would have allowed just enough Visigoths to enter Rome (Texas) to keep inflation at bay? Or maybe it was that he sat and watched the Senate burn for a couple of hours or so just to see if the serfs could hold their own against the armed lions he let loose in his colosseum to spread the fire. I heard he was dismayed that the serfs held their own and mostly survived.

Turns out, there are lots of turns outs these days is all I can say. Turns out that before he won that first national beauty contest, he’d paid off one of his buddies to disconnect tilt on the machine he was playing so that he could be sure to win. No other machine was rigged like that. That a dark horse won the prize was pretty sexy to a lot of wannabe and gullible players who didn’t understand how he won. It’s doubtful they even understood how the game is played. But he did have a great score in his first tournament. But now the tournament judges are reviewing the tapes of his second tournament and it ain’t looking good for our Pinball Wizard. Even though he has a supple wrist, he’s still a deaf, dumb and blind kid. Even if it’s the only thing he can do well, he sure plays a mean pinball.

He has a problem though. That Pinball Wizard crap doesn’t play well with the dungeon and dragons gamers of the judicial system. The Pinball Wizard has to sit and listen to all the ways the solids he did for his bros so they can all make money turned out to melt at room temperature. One of his game crushes ratted him out for how he played her and then sweet talked her by putting a lot of time on her phone. He didn’t go as far as putting her on his plan because his plan didn’t have any more room, according to him. Then there was wifey… Even long-time players in his campaign were relieved that pickle ball started in the neighborhood. Gave them something else to do so they had an excuse for umm, losing focus.

What’s crazy is that one of his players is a media giant. Not a News giant, a media giant. He is responsible for that grocery store gossip paper which blares sleazy headlines at shoppers waiting impatiently at a kazillion checkout lines all across the known world. He uses sleaze to trigger impulse buys of his sleaze at the check out. He does not run the Times or the Post or the Beacon, or ABC or CBS or NBC. Or anything approaching supposed respectability. But the guy has made a couple of tons of money promoting that last guy. The one who is running again. So all the Bettah News Papahs began to reevaluate sleaze and found that it is, indeed, highly profitable. Turns out that little by little, their highfalutin moral high ground wasn’t as beckoning as it appeared to be, it turns out that there’s nothing wrong with them making a little off the Orange Guy, too. So why not? And poof! The fifth estate is more like a room at the Downtown Marriott.

It isn’t only the Bettah News Papahs, but it’s the Legacy Television News Networks as well. They all auction off reality-based truth for the most seemingly righteous pelf and then advertise that Magalizer as sound fiscal policy to the public. The News Corporation people are terribly involved with copying something that made someone else bank. Originality is frightening, you know.

The problem is they have yet to find what it is they actually do and if they have found it, they’re hiding it in a closet somewhere. So they all cater to folks who are predisposed to like what Bonnie and Clyde did because it made the fat cats suffer like the skinny cats. And…it sells the hell out of The News. No work required.

There is often a problem with that approach to populism masquerading as titillating fact, though. Sooner or later, the long arm of the law reaches out and the car they’re escaping in is suddenly filled with flying particles which do immense bodily harm and the Bonnie and Clyde myth comes to an abrupt end. The next morning, everyone kibitzes about how unfair it was to end like that but then playing with fire will burn them patties.

Overall, the News folks have been tallywacked by the last guy and his ever-present whining. The televised offshoot of that sleazy supermarket checkout impulse buy brought that same sleazy marketing to the foxy market accessed by the hole in your house that lets the internet in. They promote the most sleazy issue of the day and the legacy news, not to be outdone, reports on it too. Mostly to poke fun at the sleazy reporting. But now they’re just as sleazy as the checkout sleaze. Ain’t that cute?

Well, I can understand why you might believe that set of facts doesn’t represent very much cuteness at all. But wait, here’s an even cuter happening you will really not believe. The Orange Guy is currently on trial for personally paying off a porn star so her story about how they spent the night together would not be leaping out at every bored shopper standing in every checkout line in the known world screaming to the public that Orange screwed the porn star. The reason he paid her phone ahead was he didn’t want her story screwing up his chance at the Biggest Office there is. Then he said that payoff was a legal fee so no one would know. Tch Tch, that’s such bad form, Orange.

But it’s hard to feel sorry for the poor pumpkin because he has had emotional support from the SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES! At his trial that centers around him fucking a porn star! The Speaker is supposedly an anti-porn crusader. Why is he supporting that Orange Guy? So he doesn’t feel the need to hide by falling asleep? What will the Speaker’s teenage son think about how this looks? Is the Speaker supporting fucking porn stars and then hiding it from… The voters? Awwwrrrk!

Orange has also had emotional support from TWO UNITED STATES SENATORS! Well, it was Tommy and J.D. They ain’t an A-team anywhere, but they are United States Senators backing fucking porn stars and calling that a legal expense so the voting public doesn’t find out. Are they leaving clues about their own closeted-skeletons? There’s been more parasites hanging around trying to suck up any extra attention, but altogether they don’t amount to much–no matter what CNN says.

The poor distraught man being tried for his alleged crimes has not had emotional support from anyone who knows him or is related to him, though. Well, Eric came one day, but couldn’t handle the pressure or maybe the sadness. The only support the Man is currently receiving is from people who want to ride his infamy to their own personal glory. I’m sure the Arizona Lake girl will show up. CrossFit Karen has to show up. Matt Gaetz has to try to keep out of trouble with the Congress for screwing an underaged girl, then bragging on the floor about his exploits and sharing his recipe for exploitation. So, he has his trial seat reserved, to be sure. Now that the defense has begun, expect the courtroom to sprout mendicant supplicants vying for the validation stamp to be issued for their acceptance into the Imaginary Guild of Freedom Circus Performers and Alternate Reality Apologists. It’s just like the Hotel California. You can check out anytime you want, but you can never leave. You won’t ever get that smell that surrounds Orange off your skin, either. I don’t know why, but it does remind one of sulfur somehow.

This blog was first published on May 23, 2024.

The Wright’s View is a blog written by John Worthington and is presented by The Business of Forging Agreement.

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