trauma
At its core, trauma can be thought of as the psychological wounds that persist, even when the physical ones are long gone.
Entry #3
Where to begin. I wrote my letter. It was messy and confusing. I feel like the words "messy" and "confusing" sum up every single area in my life at the moment. This process is neither linear or easy. I'm having flashbacks and intrusions of some of the saddest moments of my life. My dogs. I don't understand why they keep coming up or what I'm supposed to do to process them. Do they play a part in the person I am today? I guess it makes sense. I don't know.
By Hilary Dane5 years ago in Psyche
How a Survivor Survives Divorce
Divorce sucks. Regardless of the circumstances between you and your former spouse, it's going to be difficult. The number of years you were married doesn't seem to lessen the emotional sting, either. I have an aunt who recently divorced after forty years of marriage and a close friend who, like me, divorced after five. Both have experienced and are still experiencing pangs of grief that, like chronic illnesses, really never go away completely. But, I'm not writing this piece for "normal" divorcees (whatever that means). This short essay is for anyone else who, like me, had to divorce swiftly, with a protection order.
By Jenny Rowe5 years ago in Psyche
Domestic Violence During Quarantine
A foreword: There are many kinds of stories of people that quarantined in 2020. Many of us read books, learned how to plant gardens, perfected baking recipes, practiced making babies, worked from home, took on active roles in our children's education, were grateful to just be alive.
By Alejandra Mora Hendler5 years ago in Psyche
A Spoon, Please
“What is it like for you?” I’ve been asked this, in a number of different ways. Each time, the speaker twists the words, bending them into the shape they feel is least offensive, unobtrusive. I usually provide brief answers, giving them words like exhausting, heavy, or bleak. But just for today, I’ll give you more.
By K.E. Diller5 years ago in Psyche
The Seventh Blue Bird
It had been two years since the sides of her mouth curled upward. Natasha had dropped out of school to chase after a boy she had met that summer. She didn’t know what drew her to him, but she was nuts about Travis. They ran away together and, at the time, she truly felt he was the love of her life. Then, a month into the relationship, things began to change. Natasha discovered the true nature of her lover. He was a narcissist and now she was sure of it. He forced her away from close family and friends, fearful they might persuade her to leave him. She became a far removed version of herself. Who she was had withered away into nothing. Now, in the form of a shell, she took demands and mostly kept quiet. She felt like a stranger living in her own body. It was as if she had been brainwashed. Sometimes she felt she had been. Every day she grew increasingly numb to the pain. Eventually, the vacancy of her emotions began to shift. Something stirred inside her and Natasha couldn’t ignore it any longer. She was angry, but not with Travis. Her feelings for him were mostly those of resentment and compassion. Knowing what he had experienced as a child was part of the reason she put up with the abuse. The anger she felt was directed at herself for giving away her control. She had to find a way out of this relationship or it would destroy her if it hadn’t already.
By Antonia Kimball5 years ago in Psyche
The Perfect Place
"We are so lost." Elle was skeptical of the old maps we found in his car. We didn’t have much of a signal out here in the middle of nowhere either, so GPS was hopeless. Had to rely on old school methods like a couple of wandering settlers in search of paradise. In this case a couple of college kids on vacation. Our first cross country road trip. We were on our way to an amusement park in Florida from Chicago for some much-needed relaxation.
By Nick Spivey5 years ago in Psyche
Behind the mind of Olivia
Beyond the vacant mind of Olivia lives a tumultuous past that she bears no recollection of. She knows her name, birthday, social security number and emergency contact but nothing else is present on her release forms from the hospital. At this moment, lying in a hospital gown, connected to an IV and a plethora of machines, Olivia is strangers with her reflection in the mirror. A reflection that she avoids as the thought of leering at the lifeless figure before her sends a repulsive chill through her borrowed body. Olivia is overwhelmed with the looming question that has flooded her mind since she awakened to the fluorescent lighting of the intensive care unit; how do I live a life that doesn’t belong to me? She hasn’t the slightest memory of life before feeling like an entity taking over another’s soul. How does she pick up where her former self left off? The obvious answer is to leave with her mother, Bethany and endur an awkward car ride with a woman whose eyes remain full of heavy tears on the cusps of falling. Bethany’s failed attempts at getting Olivia to converse in the messy minivan, that reeks of cigarette smoke, only makes Olivia feel less connected to this new life of her’s.
By Georgia Monroe5 years ago in Psyche
